Sharing infertility plans with MIL

[LondonTTC]

I would love to hear from those who are mother in laws.

I have been with my husband for 16 years and have a very good relationship with my mother in law. My DH also does. I have known her since I was a teenager when my mother died.

We recently shared with her that we are several years down the line of trying to start a family and are beginning IVF. We felt as a couple that we needed to 'let someone in'. My DH has said he is happy to share our journey with her (it is private except for our closest friends who are a married couple).

If you were my DHs MIL, how much would you feel comfortable discussing? If it were my own mother, I would discuss it with her at each step but I don't want my own experiences and wish to share to make my MIL feel uncomfortable. I feel I would like to discuss it with family but I appreciate the relationship is different and I'm finding it tricky to navigate.

Will also post in infertility.
Thanks in advance.

Hi, I'm not a MIL but I have shared our story with mine. I get on so well with her and she has been somewhat of a rock since my own mum died. She is also going to help us fund some of our treatment.

I just share as much as I thinks appropriate and she can ask questions. My MIL would also tell me I share to much.

I am a bit of an over sharer but she basically knows everything that we are going through. I don't discuss how much sex me and hubby are having but she knows the whole process and our obstacles.

I think how much you share is personal and I'm sure she will be supportive and understanding.

Xx

Thank you for replying and sharing your own experience. It is really helpful to hear from someone who has been through the same thing.

My mum died before I was ttc. We've told mil and fil but I am a bit disappointed as they go all awkward! They would never bring it up and when I do (rarely) they often change the subject quite soon. When I had to leave to go to an acupuncture appt my fil asked why I was having it and I said for fertility and they started apologising for asking! I think they just find it awkward and don't know what to say. I feel a bit sad for my dh as he doesn't get the support there. I talk to my sisters and factually to my dad, but he doesn't get that really. I think you should try it and see. Everyone is different.