Need support

[Luxylux84]

Hi,

I feel a bit silly posting here but I’m sure someone else will know how I feel. Been trying for a year and I just feel a little bit overwhelmed with everything right now, I’m stress eating so I’ve put on weight and I don’t feel myself and there’s a part of me that doesn’t even want to keep tracking etc because the disappointment of not being pregnant is too intense… I’ve been dreaming of the moment I’d realise I’m pregnant my whole life and now that I’ve finally met the perfect partner, I’m 36 and not sure if it’ll happen. Anyway, sorry for the rant, just spent the day sobbing and any kind word would be appreciated x

Hi @Luxylux84 you're definitely not alone, it's so tough, I've never has a BFP ever either. I knew there was something wrong so got investigations after 9 months and then went into IVF at the 12 month mark. Have you spoken to your Gp about investigations, it sounds like you've been trying long enough?

@Luxylux84
I'm sorry you're feeling like this. I've been where you are and it is so so hard. Nothing can prepare you for those feelings each month. I must admit when I hit the 12 month mark, as devastating as it was, I was somewhat relieved that I could get help. As soon as I contacted my GP I did feel better emotionally. But it is a very lonely place to be. Sending lots of hugs x

[quote DisneyGirl2387]@Luxylux84
I'm sorry you're feeling like this. I've been where you are and it is so so hard. Nothing can prepare you for those feelings each month. I must admit when I hit the 12 month mark, as devastating as it was, I was somewhat relieved that I could get help. As soon as I contacted my GP I did feel better emotionally. But it is a very lonely place to be. Sending lots of hugs x[/quote]
@DisneyGirl2387@Gardenlady543 thank you so much both for your replies. I’ve been in touch with my gp already and my partner and I have had blood tests which came back normal so the next step is the fertility clinic. I had an ectopic pregnancy when I was 19 so there might be an adhesion or something blocking one of my tubes and I’d love to get that answer so I can get closure. However, my fertility appointment (which was months away) was cancelled because my BMI is slightly over 30… I know I can “just” lose the weight but it felt so not compassionate to be honest, all my blood tests have been healthy otherwise (cholesterol, sugar etc) and I could have lost the weight by the time of the appointment… so that was a big blow to be honest! I’ve been told IVF is only covered by the NHS after two years of trying? But maybe that depends on where you are? I also feel like my life is on hold while I’m waiting to become pregnant, I’m not able to change jobs even though I’m not feeling very fulfilled in mine because I’d lose my maternity benefits etc etc… Sorry to be such Debbie Downer, just feeling a bit too much today xx

Hey! No, you're not alone.
I know it can be difficult to do, but try to focus on one step at a time. First, get a refaral and book an appointment.
Finally, there are many ways to deal with stress, like stress-eating, there are nutritionists that specialize in this area, and fertility as well. I'm sure they can help you. Find some general advice online, or follow some of them on social (that's what I do).

Good luck! Keep us posted!