Start again?

[BuffyFanForever]

Hi all, sorry for long post but would love some advice. I used these boards a lot over my years of trying for my babies. I finally had success and had twin boys almost 3 months ago. I always wanted a big family but had years of heartache trying (not to mention a fortune spent) before these little guys came. I was also super sick with hyperemisis during my pregnancy so couldn’t even enjoy it.
I am really feeling like I want another baby. We don’t have any embryos left now so would have to start the entire IVF process again with egg collection etc. We only have one vial of our donor left and wouldn’t consider going forward with another one so it could all be a massive waste of time/energy/ money...am I being ridiculous thinking about this again? Should I not be thinking about how we can properly build up our saving for the future etc? Basically would love some advice about whether I should just be happy with what I have and move forward or start the whole thing again (would be a huge strain financially) to try and expand our family. Apologies if I seem ungrateful for my boys in any way, I’m not, they are a complete delight.

Congratulations on your twins!

Did you always want more than two? Of course you can be grateful for what you have and still want more. And nobody can tell you if that's right for you. I would say that at only 3 months after your babies were born, maybe things haven't settled down yet so it might not be the best time for making big decisions, if it isn't something you were already considering before you had them. I can't help but think it's a bad time to actually worry about it. You might regret that later when you think back on these precious months?

That said, if you know you want more and it's important to you, you have to consider whether you'd regret not trying. I know with IVF you always feel time is ticking by too quickly and there's always that pressure to do it before it's too late. How old are you?

Congratulations on your twins!

I also have 3 month old boy/girl twins (and an older child) after 7 losses and 5 rounds of IVF.....I have 2 more embryos frozen.

I'm also feeling like at the moment I want to transfer what I have left. I wouldn't go through another egg collection but I feel like I went through so much to get these blastocysts that I want to at least give them a chance (not to mention every last penny of our house equity and bank loans!).

Physically I couldn't risk twins again so can't transfer together as even though I had no sickness etc symptoms the entire pregnancy I experienced huge bleeds from 28 weeks and then haemorrhaged at 34 weeks when they were born by c section

I don't even mind if they didn't stick really. At least I've given them a chance and I'll have no regrets then and no "what ifs"

I haven't mentioned to DH yet although it's me as the main earner who has the biggest say and he hasn't done a single night feed etc with the 2 babies we have (so wouldn't matter if we had 3 kids or 10 to him!) but I'm sure his response will be that he wants us to start easing the reins financially (IVF has drained us the last 3 years) a'd another child would add another couple of years on to the already 5 year plan before we can move to a bigger house. But we've already had to buy a 7 seater car so in my mind I have 2 spare seats to fill! 🤣

If you are not done you are not done.

Personally for me though I would only use the donor sperm you have left to provide full siblings.

Thank you for your replies. We definitely would want our children to have the same donor so would only have one last try with our 1 remaining vial. I’ve booked a consultation at the ivf clinic for Friday. It’s a crazy amount of money we do t really have but feel it’s the right thing to just give it a try. If it doesn’t work we will be very happy with our 2 but will at least know we tried x