I need advice!

[Rdaisyleo]

So I've been ttc for 5 years. This last year I've had the fertility tests and I've referred for ivf. I have 2 friends and they know how l I've been trying, friend 1 knows I've been having tests but thats it and friend 2 just know I've been trying for 5years.... now friend 2 had an ectopic pregnancy on Friday, which is awful for her (I wrote a post about how I feel about that) and has asked me to come and clean her house on Wednesday.... I've said yes but I'm struggling already with my mental health about infertility and hearing that she got pregnant again so quickly after removing the coil has hit me.... so I need help about what to do if she starts talking to me about it?.. how do I say, I'm not the one to talk to about this??

The UK is in lockdown. You can't go into someone else's house. Use that as an excuse.

@physicskate. I'm a cleaner and The government have made it clear that domestic cleaners will still be permitted to work inside peoples' homes as long as the government guidelines on social distancing and staying safe are followed. And she knows I'm working. So it doesn't solve my problem unfortunately

I am currently waiting to start ICSI, will be stating next cycle. However I also had a very traumatic ectopic pregnancy 3 years ago. I won't go into the details but I was rushed into theatre and had emergency surgery. This was by far the most traumatic experience of my life. And I still feel guilty about having to sign the consent forms to end my baby's life in order to save mine. Post surgery I was in a lot of emotional and physical pain for a long time and almost got addicted to prescription pain killers.

I am not taking away from your experience (I am currently living that too). I do appreciate that you may not feel strong enough to be there for your friend. However you probably have more in common than you think. If you feel able to open up to your friend I think she will need it. As well as grieving for the loss of her baby she is probably also worried about her longer term fertility, which maybe you can support each other through. I don't know if you are aware but having an ectopic pregnancy reduces your fertility and you also have a 30% risk of any future pregnancies being ectopic (which would be terrifying for her at present, I don't know if i could go through that again). I think you could be an excellent support for your friend with your experiences. I hope you manage to find the strength for both of you x x

@donimo thankyou. I didn't know that about ectopic pregnancy and thankyou for explaining the emotional toll it takes. I honestly didnt know.

How were we meant to know she was hiring you?? You made it sound like she was wanting you to come over a do her a favour.

I'm sorry I can't be of any help.