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Irrational anger towards husband

4 replies

pixelflower · 21/10/2020 12:15

Nothing anyone can do to help but just want to get this out to people that will hopefully understand.
I'm in the fertile window, we're both home in the evening at the right time ( I work nights) but husband had a headache last night, and has messaged saying he still has a headache. I try not to put the pressure on him by saying so just leave it when he's feeling bad but today I'm really upset, angry and feeling bitter and directing it towards him.
We're on the waiting list for IVF for unexplained after 5 years TTC and I feel so angry at him that even when we get to that stage I'm going to be the one that has to go through the most.
It's not fair on him cause the headaches are an ongoing thing that he's waiting for an appointment for ( bloody Covid) and he has quit smoking to help our chances.
I'm just so emotional today and need to get it out without upsetting him too.
Hoping that now I've got that out I'll feel better and stop feeling like a horrible person.

OP posts:
willithappen · 21/10/2020 15:35

@pixelflower totally understandable. I was the same for a long time too.

Because we are on the waiting list for IVF I have taken the pressure off us and don't time dtd or to opks anymore. It's been almost 5 years for us too so at this point I'm not seeing the point in the extra stress and just letting things happen. Seems IVF is the way it's gonna end for us so taking the time while we are waiting to take it easy on ourselves after so long.

EL8888 · 21/10/2020 19:48

Yep l can see why you feel this way. The burden of IVF was very much on me, it didn’t impact on him a fraction as much. We initially were “unexplained” but more recently we have found the issues are with him Confused

Chicasimona · 22/10/2020 12:26

Hi @pixelflower
We have been ttc since 2015 and it's s been a long 5 years. We are unexplained as well and waiting for IVF.
I went through all sorts of emotions and anger in the past few years and now I just let it go. If it didn't happen in the last 5 years what chances are to work this month right? If DH doesn't feel well or tired let it be. I stopped doing OPK's as I just felt more pressure on myself and my husband.
The main thing is we are on the IVF waiting list and we will get there X

pixelflower · 22/10/2020 13:49

Thank you all for replying. It's really helped and I feel a lot better. Sorry you're all going through, or been through this too.

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