Why do consultants make you feel like you’re lying? advice on laparoscopy please

[Lifeisstressful]

So following on from my previous post I had my Gynae appointment (telephone) today.

He ran through my symptoms and basically tried to fob me off any investigations saying because we do manage to have sex and I’m not off work with my symptoms all the time then he really wouldn’t want to put me forward for a laparoscopy.
I argued my case and said it does impact me and I’ve discussed the symptoms with family and friends and none of them have similar to me so I would like it investigated. He has agreed to put me on the waiting list.

I just feel like shite now and like I’m making it all up and exaggerating because I still manage to go to work and have sex (even though some positions hurt 🙄)

Any advice on laparoscopy? What did you feel like after? How long did you take off work? How long did you wait for your appointment?

I'm sorry you had that reaction. No advice on laparoscopy but just to say that I have been told I have endo due to having chocolate cysts but I have absolutely zero symptoms. The consultant told me it is possible to have silent endo

Thank you for replying @TTCIVF
He really made me feel like if I’m not in bed for weeks on end and not able to have sex at all then he wasn’t happy about a laparoscopy.

I’m pleased you have some answers and hopefully your consultant will help x

I was dishonesties with endo through laparoscopy over a year ago now. It seems to me like you were being fobbed off because you are not, in their opinion, unwell enough which is not very helpful. I was offered a lap as soon as I saw a consultant but I chose to be referred to fertility first and they took over and off course they did a lap as part of that process too. I waited for about 3 months on the nhs. I was exhausted after the procedure and didn't do very much at all the first few days after (I think this is mostly due to the anaesthetic) It took me about 3 weeks to get fully back to normal. The worst pain is from the gas trapped inside you so get some peppermint tea in to help with that. I would also recommend getting a few night dresses if you don't have them already as you won't want anything rubbing against the wound for a good few days after. Find out if they will treat the endometriosis if they find it whilst they are their. They did with me. If they just have a look and diagnose you might find you recovers faster but may need another procedure for treatment later on. Unfortunately, for me it has not solved my fertility problems however, at least I know. Good luck x

Thanks @SpyroC, he said they will cut away any endo if they find any. He just kept saying how it comes with risks and as we’re managing to have sex etc etc 🙄 he didn’t seem fussed about clots falling out of me in the shower or the excruciating pain. He suggested that I may have had cysts that have popped now (fantastic!)

Thanks for you advice, I will stock up on both once I know when I’m going in for it. I hope your fertility issues are helped soon, it’s just the worst club to be in x

Hi @Lifeisstressful
Sorry to hear you’ve been fobbed off. I was seeing a gynae privately who wasn’t keen on operating and has flitted between me having endo,adeno and once my haemmhoragic cyst had gone said it couldn’t be Endo and that I was probably experiencing ovulation pain which they can’t treat other than birth control which isn’t suitable as we are TTC.

I was seeing fertility on the NHS anyway and they’ve referred me for a Lap. I’ve managed to get that covered on my insurance and went for a pre op today, Thursday I’ll be having it done.

If you’re TTC then the fertility team will probably suggest you have one anyway- have a good look around l, check your tubes and treat any endo when they are in there.

I have PCOS and they’re going to do ovarian drilling for me at the same time so it won’t be a complete waste if no endo found

I too felt like you- I get intense pain but not as bad as some other people I know of who have endo. We also manage sex though it’s painful on occasion.

Part of me is dreading waking up on Thursday and them saying there’s nothing wrong with me as it’ll look like I’ve exaggerated the whole thing but we know our own bodies and if you want it checking out then I’d ask for a second opinion, you’re entitled to that. Look for specialists in your area- I’m i. Yorkshire and know of one

My new consultant put it to me like this
1.theres no endo but you haven’t conceived so we need to work out why (no judgment)

1. There is Endo and we treat there and then
2. There is endo that is too severe to treat so we’ll refer you for IVF and assess your options once you’ve had a child.

It’s frustrating that women not trying for kids are put on the pill to manage their symptoms but that seems to be the norm unfortunately

Good luck and I hope you get some answers soon

Thank you so much for your reply @Fro93

That’s such helpful advice and you’re completely right. It bothers me and we haven’t conceived so it needs looking into.
I hope the appointment isn’t too long.
Thanks again x