Feeling utterly hopeless...anyone else?

[WE32]

Just a bit of a rant, I feel awful for doing it but I feel really alone with this with no one to talk to!
A few friends have celebrated first birthdays for their children this week and I want to be happy for them but all I've done is cry...they all started trying well after I did, I think in the time I've been trying I've had so many friends who started trying after us have children and I just feel like it's never going to happen.
We were referred for IVF this year but since covid that's been cancelled, I'm lucky that I have the option to look into going private but I'm worried depending on the situation that might get cancelled too.
I know other people are in far far worse situations and I feel guilty too for allowing it to impact me this much!

I hear you! I am even ‘worse’ than you. Spent the past two days crippled with jealousy after seeing a happy smiling picture of a girl I used to know in college cradling her bump. We got married the same month and I heard from a mutual friend she has been trying since then same as me (nearly 3 years) but we stopped being friends as she wasn’t particularly nice to me and it seems so unfair she has gotten success and I’m failed ivf rounds down with pretty severe male and female factors. And this is a girl who has struggled too clearly. But I just feel like why are we so unlucky and others get success.

Wonder if anyone has any tips for dealing with this kind of thing???

Never feel bad for having feelings! I’m in the same situation with birthdays, second babies etc. It’s horrendous and it does feel super lonely.

Have a cry! Let it all out, tomorrow is a new day and hopefully you will feel a little better for having a cry.
I’ve also started listening to thisisalice (insta) meditation and going to start reflexology on Monday for some ‘me’ time.

I hope this low passes you fairly quickly xxx

I feel like that 3 years then get to the stage of starting IVF and boom covid 19 hits and takes it all away. Everyone seem to be starting back up and my clinic has not as of yet. Some days I just don't want to face the world anymore. Then i look at the bigger picture not just my situation and feel guilty I feel this way because the devastating effect covid has had on people's lifes. So it like on rollacaster one min ok next crying. Then i can be in rooms with people and not really be there in mind so I have no idea what they said or did because all I am thinking about is IVF 24/7 xxx

Thanks everyone for replying, wishing everyone the best of luck for the future xx

Don't ever feel guilty for having feelings or belittle them by comparing to what other people may or not be going through. You are living this and how you feel is your reality, so allow your feelings to happen and don't beat yourself up for having them. Sending love.