Feeling so lonely in treatment

[ICSI]

DH and I have been referred to a fertility clinic due to male factor infertility as well as PCOS and raised prolactin in my side.

Our first appointment was supposed to be in March but was delayed because of Coronavirus. I had a phone version of the appointment the other day but it was just me on the phone and I felt really rushed through. The doctor told us we would need ICSI and referred us for another set of tests. As it was a phone appointment it was just me on my own.

I had a blood test at a new hospital quite a way away from where we live and had to go on my own because of all the restrictions.

I absolutely understand why all of these restrictions are in place and I wouldn't expect them to change, but it is just making me feel so lonely, like I'm doing it all on my own.

DH is the closest person to knowing how all of this feels but because of all of this is having less and less involvement.

I don't think there is anything that can happen to make it better but it just feels really sad at the minute and as though it's all real bit I'm doing it on my own.

Fertility treatment is very lonely even during normal times and with all the extra regulations at the moment i know it's worse. I've done 5 rounds of IVF and 4 transfers though and pretty much done every appointment, scan, egg collection and transfer on my own but I sometimes prefer it though as I can concentrate on myself and not have to worry what DH is doing! I'd join one of the threads running of women going through treatment at the moment as there is a lot of support on those. To be honest once your in the thick of it you might find you want to talk to other women going through the same - the husbands etc can hold our hands and maybe help with the injections but at the end of the day it's us that have to go through the worst of it - the constant intrusive scans, the body changes, the drugs, hormone changes etc. I found I'd rather talk to other women than my DH as whilst he was of course sympathetic he couldn't ever really empathise with what it feels like xx

Hi @ICSI IVF can feel lonely because it's hard to share with friends or family. I don't even talk to my closest friend about it because there are so many stages and factors and having to explain each one just isn't helpful. I have found Mumsnet forums to be a total godsend. There are women there who know what you are talking about without having to explain it. It also helps me take my mind of myself (a bit) being able to follow other people's' stories.

I know what you mean about your DH being excluded. I think I would have found that hard if it was my first time too. Having said that, he gets far more stressed than I do at stuff like being kept waiting so in some ways it was easier to do alone.

I found treatment is easier once you get going. But I would definitely recommend joining a thread. You will be welcomed.

Good luck

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