How to support family member during IVF

[squiffyseesaw]

A close family member is going through IVF. I'm just wondering how to support them during this time.

I'm definitely not going to be texting them asking for updates, and am prepared to listen. I just wondered if there was anything else I could do that they might appreciate? I don't live close to them so can't pop over and help practically but I could send them something?

What would you guys love to receive at this time?

My DP and I are just about to start IVF. We've had all the preamble and signed forms - starting the shots next week. None of our family or friends know about our trouble TTC (16 months and confirmed fertility issues in both of us).
I would quite like to open up to some friends about it as I want to talk to someone other than my DP about it for once, however we're a little hesitant as we really dont want to be made a big fuss of. We're quite private people and hate being the centre of attention or having people make a big issue out of our lives. I think if your family who've started this journey have told you about it then it shows you they want you to be involved emotionally so support in the form of an occasional text or phone call (depending on how close you are normally) just checking in is probably the best way to start.
Just speaking from personal situation, I wouldn't want any big gestures, gifts or overbearing questions, I think I'd rather have people know just so they dont wonder why I might not be being my normal self or am a bit poorly (all the medication for 4 weeks or so before the actual procedures can make you quite ill). Essentially so they don't ask loads of questions!

Just to add - the time I'd definitely prefer to be made a fuss of is if a successful pregnancy occurs, because then it's all very positive and happy excitement instead of worry and concern. IVF is only successful around 20-40% of the time (depending on the situation) so be prepared for the journey to not be easy or always happy. It might help them and you if you do a bit of research into the actual process and how it's done as it might make you feel a little better equipped to talk to then about it and less likely to get lost in the technical stuff.