TTC 2 year

[Lauren2409]

Hi wondering if anyone is in the same boat as me.

I've been off the pill now for 2 year next month and actively trying for a year and a half. I have regular cycles every month my cycles are every 26 days.

I've had had my bloods done and have been told I'm ovulating. I test every month using Ovulation test and I hit my peak on day 12 every month.

Before lockdown I was waiting to be referred to fertility clinic obvs got cancelled.

My partner has a 5 year old from a previous relationship so I'm adamant that theres something wrong with me. I just feel it's never going to happen.

I take folic acid and CoQ10. I put a pillow under my hips after dtd I'm trying everything.

Everyone around me is falling pregnant which makes it so hard and upsetting and I feel like I have no one to talk to

Hi @Lauren2409
You’re definitely not alone. We’ve been trying since August 2018, all bloods done and doctor said ok. I am in the geriatric category though at 35 so it might be my age going against me.

I don’t do any opk or temperature stuff, I’m too lazy 🙈 DH and I just have sex when we feel like it - maybe that’s where we’re going wrong!!

I do use Ovia app to track periods and see when Fertile week is, my periods are also every 25/26 days. I’m due on this Wednesday actually!

How old are you?

DH and I have talked about the possibility of a child free life as we’ve kind of written the whole baby thing off I have to say. It’s hard isn’t it?

According to NHS website though it does say up to 2 years to conceive is normal so maybe we shouldn’t give up yet!

@Phoneshea
I'm 30 and my partner is 33. I'm trying to loose weight too. I'm not massive but I could do with shifting a few pounds hoping that might help a little too.

I use the ovia app to track everything too however I found that when using the ovulation tests when I'm at my peak this doesn't match what the app is saying so when I log the information everything changes.

Did you get referred to a fertility clinic or anything?

It took my friend almost 4 years to fall pregnant so I'm not giving up hope yet.
If it never happens then it just was not meant to be.

It's so hard at times when someone tells me I'm all smiles and excited for them but inside I'm crying.

@Lauren2409

No we didn’t get referred. Just Had tests that the doctor surgery offers, which is bloods and sperm test. We won’t be asking to be referred either as we don’t want to do IVF.

Sounds like you’re doing everything you can. Good luck!

@Phoneshea
My partner already has a little girl so I couldn't even have IVF unless I funded it myself. Unfortunately that's not something we could do. But I know they can help in other ways.

Dtd feels like a chore at the moment

Hopefully it will happen for us both soon good luck!

I know you think because your partner has a child already that he must not be the issue but I would advise getting him tested.

There are so many factors that could have changed things for him since then, or they always say it only takes one so the first could have been a lucky one. Lifestyle factors can affect SA results and I think I would try that first to see if perhaps there is something going on there.

Is your partner taking any supplements also?

You are not alone! I've been trying since Easter last year 1st baby. Had progesterone test, ultrasound, internal etc. Came back with a bulky right ovary which suggests PCOS but my periods are fairly reg. Husband SA count looks to be low. GP didn't go into much detail and we are awaiting appointment now in July. We have been in limbo ever since. And it's draining. Found out an ex friend was preg on fb last week and I honestly had a meltdown. I don't even know why. Feels like everyone can crack it and I can't so believe me you are not alone at all.

We've been TTC for about 9/10 months now but have never used anything in the 2 years we've been together. Everyone that tells me they fell pregnant first time I just want to cry at. It's really getting me down but I'm trying not to let DP see it.

We've been referred, trying to book in for SA which is likely to show 0 as DP had cancer in the past, but I have PCOS too so basically not looking likely without IVF.

GP did bloods and told me I'm ovulating which I think I did that cycle cause my boobs were so incredibly painful but this month I definitely haven't ovulated (I tend to feel it) and no sign of AF, although I am only day 25.

Hi @Lauren2409,
A friend of ours who already has an 8 year old from previous relationship has been tested for SA and his results came back bad so unfortunately having a child is not a guarantee.
If I was you I would ask to be referred to a fertility specialist, they can run some extra tests and maybe you can try Letrozole or Iui that is less invasive if IVF is not the route you are willing to take.

@Chicasimona
@willithappen
Our doctor wouldn't refer him as he said nothing much would change for him in the 4 year so we went to a different doctor and her referred him for test but the current situation has put everything on hold. We called the fertility unit and they are not commencing appointments for another 4 weeks.

I hate waiting feel like I'm loosing time.

@Catsnkidsistheplan @Pinkbunny2811 I've had to come off social media for a bit it seems to all be about people having baby's and it is hard. My partner is so supportive but I don't think he will ever understand how I feel with him already having a little girl.

@Lauren2409 are any of the private clinics in your area testing?

I would get on some fertility vitamins in the meantime for both of you until you can get some answers

@willithappen no not yet another 4 weeks yet we have been taking vitamins since the start of lockdown we got told it could be later September by the ermine we get an appointment!!

Didn't want to read and run. I truly sympathise - it's so very difficult when it seems that the world is getting pg and you're not. We had 8 years of hell before our BFP, and many, many different types of treatment to get there. During that time all our friends were on their first, second and, in some cases, third baby.

I would echo what another pp has said - don't assume that the "problem" is with you. I know that your partner already has a child, but a man's sperm count can change from month to month, so things might well have changed since his little girl was born. Sometimes there isn't even anything that can be identified (as in our case); whilst that's intensely frustrating, it can help the feeling that you are in this together and nobody is to blame, nobody is at fault. Of course no-one is, but I myself felt that it was "my fault" that we couldn't have a baby because that's what women are supposed to do, even though my doctors never found the reason for the infertility.

I truly hope that you get your positive outcome. Hang in there, you are most definitely not alone.

I could almost be you down to the ages and everything! TTC since Jan 18, all tests for both of us have come back fine and currently have my fingers crossed that having HSG a couple of weeks ago might give us a bit of a helping hand.

It's completely heartbreaking (but plastering the smile on of course) when you find out that in your small circle of school friends, a 5th pregnancy has just been announced in the time we've been trying.

Just want it to be our turn now. I don't test any more as that is wasting money and time [staring at a white space willing something to appear].

I know exactly how you feel.
Hug