Low self esteem

[Eggcellent29]

Hello everyone

I am hoping that some of you can help me to pick myself up a bit here!

How are you overcoming the crippling feelings of failure and low self esteem that come with infertility?

I won’t bore you with the details, but it’s taking over my life. I have tried to get help from my GP but she completely dismissed me (actually asked me to leave because I was making other patients wait by taking too long to tell her what was wrong) and this has only added to my feelings of worthlessness.

Any tips welcome!

Yikes! Awful GP. Not your fault. Don't let others tell/show you your worth. There is quite a distinction between what we are capable of within our control and what limitations are imposed on us by our biology. Infertility is a disease just like any other. If you suffered from type 1 diabetes or a congenital heart condition you would likely be sympathetic towards yourself because you were born that way and it's not your fault. No one is perfect. Just be forgiving of yourself for having a disease over which you have no control. As long as you are trying to do something about it take comfort in knowing you're doing all that is humanly possible. So if it doesn't work out you should have no regrets, only a reason to congratulate yourself for doing your best with what life sent your way. Other people who haven't had trouble conceiving may not understand but that's ok because we are all naturally constrained by our own experiences. Good luck being your own best friend and cutting yourself some slack. Even if your body hasn't yet had much luck in the baby making department I bet it's good at many other things!

@eggcellent29 I remember you from the IVF boards (I used to be "itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted") and cycled at the same time as you.

Your LO must be a new born now?

Low self esteem is pretty normal as a new mother - it's a stressful and anxious time constantly wondering if you are doing you're best and dealing with the massive changes to your life (and body!)

Can you say why you are connecting your low self esteem to infertility? For lots of women who go through infertility when they actually get the baby they've always dreamed about the reality is very hard to reconcile with how you imagined motherhood would be? But know that we ve all gone through it and come out the other end x

You are not alone lovely. I feel like this most of the months specially when my AF shows up. I even went for councelling but the guy made me feel even worse so if you look out for help make sure it is somebody trained around infertility.
I put little targets for myself every so often to feel I have achieved something, baking a loaf of bread, complete a yoga class, cook something special it makes me a little better.
Watch a funny movie and have a good laugh X

Hi everyone

I’ve typed and Re typed a response but I think I’m going to leave it.

Thank you all so much for your responses, but my feelings of failure also relate closely to LO’s traumatic birth (we both almost died) and I don’t think this board is the right place to discuss something like that.

I will keep reading any other tips though! And a funny movie is deffo on the cards this evening :)

Thank you all again and apologises for posting in the ‘wrong’ place. I didn’t want to post in parenting as, tbh, I felt like people over there wouldn’t understand like I know you all do. 😘