Me and my husband had been trying to conceive for 2 years before finally seeking help & getting ourselves on the waiting list for NHS referral. After waiting nearly a year, we were instantly rejected & told we were not eligible for ICSI on the NHS. We got money together for private treatment, when our marriage went on a slippery slope & after booking and cancelling our appointments a few times, not through choice of my own, my husband called it a day & said he didn’t want it anymore. My heart shattered. A week later, my husband understood his stupidity & explained his actions. He was hurting too. So after having the treatment ready to start, dangled in front of me & snatched away, I reluctantly agreed to continue, in fear that the same would happen again. My husband is a new man, his love & support has been everything i’ve needed through the whole process. Clearing the air & splitting made us understand what we wanted & how much we wanted it. We had our medication delivered in the beginning of March & days before starting, we were told that treatment will be on hold indefinitely due to Covid-19. My heart shattered again. I cry most days. I’m new to mumsnet as I just want to hear everyone elses fertility journey, as I don’t know if my reaction & heartache is normal. We read online that our clinic will be recommencing services in the beginning of July, and i broke down to hubs, cried & said I can’t cope anymore. It’s always a waiting game & it plays on my heart & mental health. Is this normal? Or have I really just had enough? There just seems like so many obstacles in our way!