IVF- What did you wish you knew beforehand?

[Elouera]

For anyone that has or is currently going through this, what advice do you wish you'd known before?

[Awkward1]

The bleeding can start before test day.
Even with pcos you might only get say 7 eggs.
You could get a hydrocele (sp) which stops eggs collection.
You might get none fertilised or they fertilise abnormally even with icsi.
Few people get to day 5 and fewer have some to freeze. Day 3 can work too

[GingerBeverage]

That the NHS moves incredibly slowly but private moves super fast (almost too fast, pressurised decisions).
And that the same NHS doctor you see once in a year for 10min is available next day if you pay private. The gap in care is huge.

[ivfbabymomma1]

That is so true about private being so quick! I had my first ever appointment in June and I was pregnant in November and I delayed it a few months. They were giving me a few appointments a week for tests! And at the end I had my egg collection and they must have put them embryo back in 10 days later or something?!

[EL8888]

-it's invasive
-lots and lots of appointments (5 some weeks)
-you will pile the weight on
-people will ask you lots and lots of stupid questions
-your lady garden will get so so sore if you're unlucky
-everyone is different and response differently to the drugs
-if you win the battle you may not win the war (our IVF seemed to go oh so well but we didn't pregnant despite lots of good quality eggs)
-drink lots of water and eat lots of protein
-being blunt but it doesn't necessarily make you pregnant but only increases the odds
-failure is oh so crushing
-at the end of it you wonder why you bothered and also wonder why people think you should spend £10-30k on it

[EarlGreyT]

I think what you wish you knew before IVF is very personal and also dependent on how many cycles you go through and the outcome, but these are mine.

• That a cycle of IVF is statistically more likely to fail than it is to succeed.
  

• How emotionally stressful the whole thing is.
  

• How stressful it is when you don’t have many follicles growing/they are slow to develop/you don’t get many eggs/you have to await the call from the embryologist to hear how many (if any) have fertilised/you have to await another call to know whether any have made it to day 3 and whether you actually have anything to transfer.
  

• How stressful it is waiting to see if it has worked
  

• That the first failure is the worst
  

• The injections are not that bad either in terms of the side effects of the medication or actually injections yourself
  

• Other people don’t get it.
  

• Other people are over optimistic about the chances of the whole thing and assume it will work (or at the very least that it is likely to work when the reality is that it’s more likely not to).
  

• It’s ok to move the goalposts and if you’re unlucky enough to be one of the people needing multiple cycles you probably will move the goalposts more than once.
  

-pregnancy after IVF is terrifying and is a lonely place

• That this area of mumsnet existed and is the best place I found to get support from sensible, humourous and realistic posters. On other boards I found people far far too over positive and full of twee language (baby dust anyone??!! Urgh).

[EarlGreyT]

• injecting yourself