Resolutions?

[Didthatreallyhappen2]

Before I am accused of being disingenuous, I went through 8 years of IVF hell before I got a +ve result. DC is now a teenager.

I just wanted to wish everyone going through the horror of IF a peaceful New Year. I had 8 years of making the same New Year's Resolution - "by the end of this year I'll be pregnant". DC was conceived on our very last go, run out of money, stamina, health …. In that final year I didn't even pray for a pregnancy, I simply wanted all the awfulness to go away.

I don't know if 2020 will be "your" year, but those of us that have been successful never forget the agony that some of you are still going through. Be kind to yourselves; unless you've been through it nobody can possibly guess how truly awful it is. And get through the new year and beyond as best you can. Cry, hide, whatever.

Sending hugs.

What a lovely message! Nearly made me cry! Thank you so much for thinking of all of us so far beyond your own journey.

2019 has been one failed transfer after another so 2020 is a make it or break it year for us. We're riding it out with secondary infertility but it still is soul destroying at times. Like you, I just want to get the next 2 rounds of IVF done (ie awfulness) so we can move on with our lives, pregnancy or not!

Sending you hugs too. Happy new year! May the coming year bring all you wish for.

Lovely message there OP.

I will all on this rollercoaster the very best for 2020.

Whatever comes our way good or bad that we all have the strength to carry on and continue going whatever any outcomes are.

For me it’s about getting into my first round of IVF which is scary to think let alone day.

Wishing you all the best today

Beautiful.. also so true you never forget the agony even when they are here because it was so hard to get it’s even more precious in my eyes
Happy new year everyone ⭐️ X

What a lovely message thank you.
We are hoping to start round 2 next year, it is such a difficult process as you know but knowing others are going through similar really helps.

Lovely message which I echo!

Good luck to you all for 2020 💐

Thank you so much OP. In bed crying - wish could see way this pain would ease

@Didthatreallyhappen2 lovely wishes! Thank you and we too are in our 8 yr IF milestone, nowt to be proud of but here we are!
Feeling sad with it all and hit a crossroad so god only knows what’s going to happen. I am looking into adoption now as that’s our only hope (unless we win the lottery?) but if anything happens this year will be a bonus!
All the best to everyone on this shitstorm of an Infertility hell..I hope you all have a positive year and get your hopes and dreams of the family yous deserve ❤️

Echoing this message from one mumma who has walked this journey. I still read these feeds to remind myself of this struggle and lend support where I can. You are not alone. Sending strength and support x

Gosh this resonates.

Background, I did 8 years, 8 cycles, 5 miscarriages and was successful in 2019.

I can still feel and taste the anguish and pain of infertility. I’m always reflective but have been moreso over this period.

From the OP Be kind to yourselves; unless you've been through it nobody can possibly guess how truly awful it is.

The above is so true and I hope that 2020 brings some peace, strength and enjoyment to those in the struggle.

I hope this hasn’t been insensitive or patronising - I’m not good with words. but I’m sending a genuine hand squeeze to those in the midst of it.

LASH38 lovely words, and huge congratulations. How wonderful you got your happy ever after. Good luck with bump, or baby, if they're already here!

It might sound weird, but the sight of a pregnant woman / new mum always upset me - but never when I knew that that woman had been through a similar struggle. It was as if I was only happy for those who had been through the tough times. That sounds awful really, but it's the truth.

X

Thank you @CkFa, I’m always reluctant to give too much detail on such threads as I would have found it painful to read but he is 9 months.

The pain is still here, though not as bad obviously.

The limbo killed me. I remember a time that the agony felt like a ton of bricks. And bother period where I couldn’t think about it as the horror of what we had been through (all 5 losses were IVF) was just too much to comprehend.

Infertility is the absolute pits. The cruelty of such grief and loss while having to maintain hope.

So I just feel it for every person who has been through and is still surviving it.

What you’ve said re feelings for pregnancy/new babies is also true for me and a friend who had a similar tough journey.

Again I hope this brings some comfort or whatever works for the reader. It’s such a lonely place but you really are not alone.

I struggled to have my DS 5 years ago.

The despair I felt trying to have him will never leave me (as well as the struggle TTC his sibling which still hasn't happened).

I felt so much pain, most days I wanted to hurt myself, cause myself pain to try and get the pain out of me.

I understand and am here for a handhold.

Unless you have walked this path you have no idea.