1 year trying, feeling a bit lonely

[MrsP240518]

Hi All, long time watcher here, first time poster!

My husband and I have been together for 6 1/2 years and been trying for over a year now to conceive. I'm not really after any advice just want to let off some steam to those who can understand what we're going through.

I've had the 21 days blood test, came back ok. Hubby has only just been referred for sperm testing (his doctors are useless, first time he went the Dr basically said I'm the problem!!) So before he finally got the referral I went back to the doctors and today had blood test for thyroid and chlamydia (I was shocked by that one as naively I didn't realise it can lie dormant in you for years!!) Hopefully all ok with that one, nurse did say my vagina looked very healthy which did make me chuckle!

My periods have always been a regular 27 day cycle, sometimes up-to 29 but usually 27. The two week wait I always struggle with, I turn into a complete bitch and how/why my DH puts up with me I never know (I must be a good cook?!) Assuming hubbys sperm comes back ok what's next?

We're in an extremely fortunate position that we can go private if we wanted to, should we? Is the NHS wait ridiculously long? I can wait an extra few weeks but a few months I'm going to start getting even twitchier?

Again, I think I just want to hear everyone else's experiences, it can be very lonely in this infertility world!

You should be able to ask your gp for an fsh test before u get referred

We were referred to nhs (private health insurance does not cover any fertility issues we discovered) and tbh did not have a good time for various reasons and ended up self funding. Now nearly 10 weeks pregnant after our first round ivf. If I had my time again I wish we hadn't wasted time nhs (2 years nearly!!) but I may feel differently if we hadn't been messed around the way we were

Congratulations, that's lovely news!

Hubby was told his referral will take 4-10 weeks but could be more or could be less! So it could be any time between now and July!! We have got quite a busy few months ahead of us with holidays and family events so I think we'll give it to the end of June, if we're still none the wiser as to why we're struggling then I think we need to look into private.

Sounds like our journey. Next appointment was always 3 months.... sometimes ended up 6! Our first appointment with the nhs fertility clinic she decided to repeat some tests we'd already had (pointless as came back same.... they were fine. We are in unexplained category). Next appointment.... 4 months later! Was all just so frustrating.

We've had a great experience with our private clinic. We haven't rushed but felt like we've taken back control.

Took us 18 months first time round. I found out I was pregnant naturally the week of my fertility appointment.

Doctors have said 18 months Is quite a reasonable amount of time. Is really rubbish though when everyone else seems to fall pregnant at the drop of a hat.

Don't lose heart OP. Fingers crossed for you.

12-18month wait time in NHS sounds about right although I've heard of some people's wait time being much less.
Conversely my ivf wait time doing mild short protocol ivf was around 2 weeks!
Bear in mind though that if you go private first you probably won't be entitled to NHS ivf in the future. If you are in an area which offers 3 full cycles I would stick with your NHS - if it's only 1 cycle I would go private x

We are about to start our first cycle (nhs) which has taken about 6 months from when I was first seen by the consultant, and only took a couple of months to get referred from the gp. I don’t know if we have been lucky, as to me it seems to have happened quite quickly or if the consultant wanted to push me through because of my age (41, was 40 at initial appt) as we qualify for one round funded up until 42. Good luck.

Practically even when you are over 35 it can take 2 years from initial referral to gaene to IVF depending on the area— regardless of whether you are NHS or private. Also bear in mind that chlymidia is only classed as fertility impacting if it has damaged your tubes; you often need another test (Level 2) to determine whether infection (or thyroid antibodies) itself has raised your white blood cell count enough to warrant steroid / intralipid treatment.