Advice please - Clexane injections / IVF and I am not strong enough to see it through

[abitlostandalwayshungry]

I started IVF and I think I am just not strong enough to continue. Since the start of injections I have been too tiered to work, which I allowed myself as I am freelance, but it already gives me the feeling of losing my work-self in potential motherhood, something i'm really scared of. I'm constantly nauseous and too tiered to think, I feel like i'm non-functioning. I found the egg collection horrific and can't relate to people comparing it to period cramps. I thought the worst would be over after the egg collection, but now i had to start Clexane injections, which are just too much too take. They are too painful and I am not sure if this is due the exhaustion caused by the medications or if I just don't want a child desperately enough to torture myself like this. The only solution my IVF doctor has, is to come into the clinic and have the Clexane injected at the clinic, which is not practicable as I would be taking it for 14 weeks. I also don't see how it will be less painful there? I feel like i have hit a wall and I can't continue with the Clexane - and i wonder is this really a sign that motherhood is not for me? maybe there reason i can't conceive is that i am mentally and physically simply not resilient enough? Is it crazy to think about stopping my IVF journey because of the Clexane injections? Any insights would be really appreciated.

Aw I'm sure you are not alone and many women have hit the wall like you have. I don't have any experience with ivf but I did have clexane injections after a c section, are they to do into your stomach? (if I've got the total wrong end of the stick here I really apologise)
Tips, do it the same time each day, I use to do it whilst watching TV... Kept me occupied.
Furthest away from the belly button seemed less painful.
Pinch an inch and grab that flab hard then needle in at an angle, over so so quickly.
Don't put pressure or ice on it afterwards as it does make the pain worse.
How about making a mood board of reasons why your doing this, to look at for motivation during your injections?

I'm sorry you're finding this process so hard, @abitlostandalwayshungry. Only you can answer the question of whether you want children enough to put yourself through this. There's no getting away from the fact that it's an emotionally hard process as well as a physically hard one.

I think you should speak to your clinic again about how you've been feeling - the tiredness, nausea and everything, not just the pain of the injections. They might offer you some counselling so you can talk it through with a professional.

Hi OP i'm so sorry you're feeling this way. I 100% don't believe your infertility has anything to do with your resilience or supposed lack thereof. What you're going through is really hard! It's emotionally draining, physically taxing and after so long ttc can really take its toll. Give yourself a break, in the kindest way possible!

I'm 8w pregnant after our third frozen embryo transfer and still on the clexane. I dread it every night, it hurts, and i hate it. I totally understand. I read somewhere some tips to make it less painful:

• pinch a fatty area under your belly button and keep pinching until all of the drugs have gone in
• make sure the air bubble goes in las by flicking the vial while it's pointing upwards
• make sure there isn't a droplet of liquid on the needle before it goes in, it makes it sting even more. Flick it off.
• don't press the skin afterwards, it'll bruise and won't help the pain
• if you use the antiseptic wipe, make sure your skin is completely dry before injecting. I actually don't use the wipes but don't want to promote that in case it's not right

I now do all of this and it's a bit better. Still hurts but not as much as before.

Best of luck with everything

Oh and i have a dd already, naturally conceived, so my hatred of clexane has nothing to do with my ability to be a mother! You'll do great.

Oh OP IVF is really hard at times, it is exhausting, I once fell asleep at my desk at work.
I found nothing as painfull as the egg extraction, including trying to give birth to a breech baby with no pain relief.
The injections are painful but I got more inured as time went on.
Fertility isn't a punishment for weakness, it isn't that only people that would be good mothers get pregnant easily. It's just a medical condition, no more, no less.
Look into things that could help manage your emotions at the moment, whether mental like counselling or physical.
Good luck. It is worth sticking with the cycle you are on.

This Youtube video is great: I had to inject Clexane/Lovenox to avoid blood clotting in early pregnancy and that video made a world of a difference. The needle doesnt actually hurt so much but it‘s the liquid inside which burns. Injecting on the stomach is definitely less painful than anywhere else, and going slowly with an ice pack helps a lot.

I had to take clexane from 12 weeks pregnancy until 3 months after baby was born - when you want something desperately you just have to do it - I lost a baby at 12 weeks before and knew clexane was important in keeping this baby alive. Yes it hurt but the results were worth it x

I had clexane for the first 12 weeks, my DH gave it to me, I would have really struggled to inject myself. Maybe he could inject into a less painful area, the bum / thigh maybe ? Not sure if this would be ok though. I pretty much would have crawled over hot coals for a DC at the time though and 7 years later it's all a bit of a blur now.

I'm not using clexane but am having to injections myself with 2 diff drugs every day (lubion and tinzaparin sodium). At first I just didn't think I could do it.... then u read a tip online to hold an ice cube over the site for 5 mins beforehand as it numbs the skin. It's really made the world of difference and now I can do the injections and not fretting about it at all

Good luck

How are you, @abitlostandalwayshungry ?

thanks so much for your insights, it all really helped and your words made a difference. especially the crafty tricks to deal with Clexane, I still think it's a badly designed product but all your tricks and hacks actually sum up to make it bearable.

I am sorry you are having such a tough time. The process is tough so you are not alone.

I did not need clexane, so am not sure, but check with the clinic and see if there is a tablet form of it or a similar medication that you can use instead.

I have to take Clexane due to a DVT I formed after a broken leg. It saved my life. The bigger stings though! The tricks with Clexane for me are:

pinch as much fat as possible around stomach

Pinch hard. Really really hard.

Use a totally different area every day around tummy button and over to hip so you aren't going straight into the bruise.

Inject directly at a 45 degree angle and get your fingers comfortable over the plunger at that point. You will be there for a while

Inject very very very slowly. I mean take around 1-2 minutes to inject it all. Look away and distract your mind while doing this. Have a Mumsnet page open or a book. This usually means no sting at all.

Ice cube on the spot for as long as you can stand before injecting (I never did this as previous point was sufficient)

Once done whip that thing out quick. Don't massage or press. Do something active immediately like pop to shops, make a coffee. Get the blood flowing

I find the Clexane much easier than those horrible IVF drugs though. Can't remember what it was but the one where you suck up stuff from the vial old school and had a massive needle. Eurgh!

Also no one enjoys injecting themselves. Majority hate it. It has no bearing on your ability to be a mother though.

Hello

I just can't across your thread because I've just started daily Clexane injections (although did it once before for 5 days), potentially for 12 week's minimum if the transfer worked, and I feel just as you describe. I've always had a needle phobia anyway.

Compounded by my daughter dying during full term labour two years ago, which already makes me think about whether I get to be a mother to a living child, or only in a graveyard. And then despite my desperation for that to happen, these injections are horrendous and making me question whether I can do this.

I just wondered whether you managed to continue. Sorry, I know you posted some time ago.