Thanks for starting this @RedPandaFluff, I've been thinking about creating a thread like this for a while.
So here's my (lengthy) introduction:
I'm 40 and fiancé is 50 and we are still ttc#1. Four rounds of IVF and I feel completely lost and further away than ever from being able to start our family.
We've had a really tough year since starting treatment, beset with problems, and I have felt utterly exhausted by it all, physically and mentally. As a result I've had to step down from my demanding career (maybe a blessing in disguise), so am about to take a year out and we'll see if reducing the stress makes a difference.
My tests are all ok and AMH fine for my age, and fiancé apparently has super sperm of a 25 year old (he was very chuffed with this remark). However I have recurrent fibroids that keep reappearing and getting in the way of cycles.
History:
Sept17 - fibroid surgery
Oct17 - IVF1 (long) but couldn't transfer due to new fibroids. One sub standard blast frozen.
Nov17 - fibroid surgery
Jan18 - IVF2 (long). Two fresh blasts transferred.
Feb18 - BFP!
April18 - traumatic MMC at 11 weeks. Very ill afterwards with Anaemia and PTSD. Fibroids recurred, inconclusive if they were linked to the miscarriage.
June18 - recommenced TTC, early chemical
July18 - IVF3 (short). Disastrous cycle, incorrect blood test led to an inappropriate protocol and poor response, nearly cancelled. Two day 1 embryos on ice.
Aug17 - fibroid surgery
Sept18 - IVF4 (long). Good egg collection but zero blasts so nothing to transfer. Defrosted the sub standard blast from a year ago, partially expanded but BFN.
On paper, our consultant doesn't see why we shouldn't be successful, but has now downgraded our chances of any more IVF with own eggs to less than 10%, just based on our previous results.
We have to make some tough decisions now about what to do next. All we know at the moment is that we are having a break until at least March (despite rapidly approaching age 41), to try and reduce stress and improve physical and emotional health.
After that maybe one more fresh round if we decide to go ahead despite the low chances, then we would try the two day1 frozens.
After that, well who knows... starting to try and get my head into the DE scenario and have had some great advice on here.
My partner is optimistic. He saw the BFP and the miscarriage as a sign we nearly got there. He thinks if I can be in perfect health then age is not a barrier... I admire his hope but I do feel the pressure of expectation.