Sadness/resentment towards pregnant SIL

[winkingdemon]

My teenage SIL is currently over halfway through her accidental pregnancy. It’s all she ever talks about. The family know about my problems and that I’m struggling with it - still waiting on appointments, having more problems etc but there doesn’t seem to be any thought there when all that’s getting spoken about is baby this baby that.
I feel so sad and guilty for the resentment I feel and I hate hearing about it. I see her regularly but she never has anything to talk about but the baby and it’s getting me down. My partner went to a midwife appt with her today because her boyfriend is useless, and has told me about hearing the heartbeat etc (I did ask what happened) and now I just feel so sad because I feel he’s heard a baby’s heartbeat and it isn’t ours? If that makes sense? So I feel like even if we ever did get to have a baby (unlikely) it wouldn’t be the first time he’d been to those sorts of things.

I want so badly to be happy for her, I’m glad her baby is healthy etc but it feels like the longest pregnancy in history and the more pregnant she gets/looks the harder it is!

Am I a bad person? I’m distraught with myself for feeling this way

You're not a bad person at all, I completely get it, I had a sweary rant (in my head!) today about Meghan (the royal one) being pregnant already. It just seems like everyone and their dog is having babies and I'm the only one not, and I'd feel exactly the same about the scan

@Pinkywoo yes I’ve had a moan about that too! Yes it feels the same here, everywhere I look and especially on social media etc everyone seems to be announcing pregnancies and I’m thinking “really?” Just feels like it’s so unfair! Especially as it was an accident and she’s very young and it’s not the best situation

All she has to talk about is her pregnancy?? That's sad for her that she doesn't have an independently fulfilling life.

I don't know how you see her. I avoided my sil during her 'accident' and still do a bit - even though I'm now pregnant from if and her 'accident' (what she calls her) is now nearly two!!

Hugs. It's shite.

@physicskate I know, it wouldn’t be too bad if she had other things to talk about but everything out of her mouth is about the baby. she doesn’t actually do anything else or go anywhere so she really doesn’t have anything to talk about, yet everyone seems to think it’s wonderful (DP doesn’t, so fortunately he is understanding although I do feel bad if I have a moan) if she were my daughter I’d be worried.

I have said to DP that I will have to curb the amount I see her as it’s getting a bit much and there’s still 4 and a half months to go which feels like forever.

Congratulations!