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Infertility

Counselling or help to make a decision - IVF on NHS?

4 replies

Blankspace4 · 02/10/2018 09:25

We are on a wait list for a potential first cycle of IVF early next year.

We’ve had to attend a group presentation on infertility / treatment options. I’ve also had to have recent surgery meaning IVF is now our only option.

But I’m still not sure. All my appts so far have been very medical / procedural. I’m finding it very difficult to process the mental side of it and all the appts seem so rushed it’s difficult.

What can I expect in the 4 month run up to treatment date - and does this include / can this include talking therapy / counselling?

It’s such a big decision and there are so many things im scared about. Im not sure I’m ok mentally to deal with the disappointment of failure (there is only one cycle available). We’ve had to deal with a lot of Medical trauma in the past and I feel like I don’t have the emotional reserves to deal with the rollercoaster and my hormones being messed up.

Also at what stage are we expected to ‘commit’?

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JeNeBaguetteRien · 02/10/2018 15:02

Hi Blank,

Ask if you can access counselling now before starting treatment.
You may need to weigh up the fallout from not having IVF (which is a valid choice) or from trying and failing, or trying and being one of the lucky first timers who gets pregnant and goes on to have a baby.

I'm your case not having IVF means not having a child that you give birth to (because of your surgery I mean).
In my case it would've meant having that miniscule hope each month and the disappointment when my period arrives.
I didn't want that. But there is also a limit as to how many times we'll do IVF (even if money weren't an issue, it is!) because it is a huge emotional toll.
The general public often think why wouldn't you, it can't be that bad.
I will say I didn't find it too bad physically, but the 2 week wait was torture.

I don't know if you think trying IVF, and dealing with whatever outcome you get, might be easier than never having tried. But I think I understand how scary it is to think this is your only chance and once it's done any hopes are gone.
If it were me I'd have it, but only you can decide (with input from your partner). And remember it is a choice, yours to make and live with. You might think fate has intervened and set you on another path.

Good luck either way. 💐

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BeaCat · 03/10/2018 08:01

We are waiting to start our first cycle on the NHS. In the last few moths we've had about three visits to the clinic which involved an internal scan, blood test, sperm analysis, chat with the doctor about the process and then filling out consent forms with the nurse. So now we are just waiting to start the medication.
As this is our first go I haven't experienced all the emotions of success or failure but I know if we want our own baby this is our only option so to us it is worth the few months of stress.
Counselling was mentioned to us but we haven't done any as yet but it sounds like it could be useful for you. Good luck 😊

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Maximoo06 · 03/10/2018 20:48

@Aksg signed Smile

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