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Infertility

Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

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Original poster

Caffeine/alcohol/exercise, etc?

21 replies

AliceScarlett · 26/06/2018 12:48

1 cup of coffee a day? Will that really make a difference?

I've stopped drinking, reduced my weekly milage and speed (I'm a ultra marathon runner), put on 2 pounds as my body fat percentage was a bit low, I take prenatals and make sure I make time for relaxation.... really not happy about most of the above tbh and not sure I want to spend my 30s doing this for little outcome.

BUT we are just about to go into our 2nd cycle of Clomid (33, 2.5 years trying) so I feel I should give it all I can.

How much do you ladies give up things you love for TTC?

OP posts:

mouse1234567 · 26/06/2018 13:12

Hi Alice. This is a really good question and one I spend a lot of time thinking about! We haven’t been ttc as long as you but it’s about a year now and over that time I have been very up and down. At the beginning I was very virtuous not drinking, avoiding too much sugar etc. But then when things didn’t happen so quickly I realised I couldn’t go on like that.

It’s just really hard as if you knew the sacrifices were going to guarantee a baby you wouldn’t mind -but we don’t! I am quite a slim build but have recently been diagnosed with PCO so know I should avoid too much sugar -it’s just really hard! Especially when you get your period! So I guess my answer is sometimes I’m good and sometimes I’m not!

sunshineandsea · 26/06/2018 13:35

I have been wondering about this too! It's so hard as you feel like maybe it will be the thing that makes the difference but then you look at all the people who get pregnant naturally with lifestyles that go against all the advice... I would do anything if it could guarantee a baby but we all know that's not the case and I don't want to make myself miserable / stressed over it!

We are 2.5 years ttc too, clomid didn't work and we're about to start IVF. I have cut way back on alcohol and plan to cut it out all together before we start, it's hard with so many social events over the summer though! I really don't want people to think I'm pregnant as that is clearly not the case! I've also switched to decaf tea (don't really drink coffee) and have started making a real effort to exercise 3 times a week, which isn't always easy to fit in around other stuff. And of course trying to make time to relax. I feel like infertility affects every decision I make at the moment...

It's hard to know what advice to follow isn't it, I've read some things that are really specific around nutrition and diet and others that say it makes very little difference to outcomes as long as you generally eat healthily.

Hope the clomid works for you OP x

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 27/06/2018 08:52

So hard isn't it. I'm so bitter and angry when I see obese women smoking over thier babies.... I just think: what is the point of me making these small changes? I know that is really awful of me :(

Day one of no caffeine today, I've decided to go all out this cycle and hope it doesn't stress me out too much, because as we know that's not good for conception either....can't win!

I reckon if we do out best then that's good enough.

OP posts:

ScabbyHorse · 27/06/2018 08:56

Both you and your partner would benefit from making healthy changes, it's not just the woman. Might help to know you're not doing it alone!

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 27/06/2018 09:12

He doesn't smoke/drink, he runs, his sperm was absolutely fine, I'm the deficient one.

OP posts:

Spoonspanner · 27/06/2018 09:31

No offence but 2 lbs is not going to make a difference if your body fat is low. Personally (and I hated it) I had to go from right at the bottom of a healthy BMI to the middle in order to conceive. Many many years trying with a BMI of 19/20, being very fit and healthy to the point of obsession (and convincing myself that that wasn’t the issue). Put on some weight, and a decent amount if you’re very slim, and dial down the exercise (I’m a competitive crossfitter) and pregnant in a few months.

Not what you want to hear. Some women do get pregnant with low body fat. And when I see a skinny pregnant person it still upsets me. But i couldn’t and you may be in the same boat.
Sorry - I’m not trying to be nasty.

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 27/06/2018 09:45

Not nasty. Having researched this a lot I think the research suggests that the more body fat you can have (as long as it's not in the obsese range) the better.
When I was 4 stone heavier my cycles were more regular, I had much more ewcm, etc.

My BMI is 19.8...

OP posts:

YogaPants · 27/06/2018 11:35

Do you have regular periods?

When my bmi has been in the 18-19 range my periods have been really irregular. I take it as a sign that it is probably not a good weight for me. I am not exercising rigorously either so I imagine being at the lower range of healthy but leaner will also have an effect.

I never cut out caffeine ttc or pregnant completely but did limit myself to one caffeinated drink a day.

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 27/06/2018 21:00

Yeah I do have regular periods, but they are generally annovulatory.

Maybe I'd rather be slim and barren, than fat and a mother that's terrifying.

OP posts:

hoping2018 · 28/06/2018 08:37

Apparently the most fertile BMI is 23.

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 28/06/2018 08:54

@hoping2018 do you have a reference for that? Be really interested to see :)

OP posts:

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 28/06/2018 09:35

hertsandessexfertility.com/wellbeing/nutrition/why-does-bmi-matter/

Urgh.

OP posts:

hoping2018 · 28/06/2018 10:10

Hi@AliceScarlett I read it ages ago! My BMI was 18 when I got married and then Went up to 20 due to an under active thyroid - always felt I wanted to get back to 18 and I know if I diet I do it well but I'm a bit all or nothing! Took us two years to conceive but I made the decision to not try and diet and my BMI has been between 20-21 for the whole two years.

Currently 9 weeks pregnant but had two cycles of ivf - so don't think BMI was a factor in the end (MFI)!

But certainly a higher BMI in the middle of the normal range is known to be more fertile.

Good luck

NoNotheresnolyrics · 28/06/2018 16:10

I’m not sure it makes a difference to be honest. I got really upset the other week when I saw a pregnant woman, with two kids, rolling and smoking a Joint. Fact is that she’s fertile and I’m not, no amount of giving up anything is going to help me.

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 28/06/2018 16:39

Can't extrapolate statistics in that way though. Some smokers love til thier 90, other people get lung cancer who have never smoked.

OP posts:

EstrellaMay · 29/06/2018 23:41

Deficient is not the best way to describe it ...

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 30/06/2018 09:14

I know. I'm not very good at being compassionate towards myself. Deficient.

OP posts:

EstrellaMay · 30/06/2018 10:06

Yes be nice to yourself as it's not an easy time. Unfort ultra marathon running may not be the ideal pastime for the next little while. See what your doc says. Would you consider switching to swimming or something else softer on the body?

kikisparks · 03/07/2018 08:31

It’s tough. I’ve been off alcohol now for 6 months apart from one glass of wine I had on a very stressful night 5 months ago. I was asked at the consultants appointment if I drink as it’s considered a no-no for getting further fertility treatment. I try not to look at it as a punishment and it helped looking at some stats that say that all alcohol is carcinogenic even in small amounts so that put me off drinking it. Also the fact I’m not drinking now means that if I do get pregnant everyone will be so used to me not drinking they won’t see it as a sign!

As for caffeine I still have up to 1 cup of tea a day sometimes 2 at the weekend. This is within the guidelines for what is safe in pregnancy so I’m hoping it’s ok. Plan to ditch caffeine altogether except maybe chocolate if I’m ever lucky enough to get BFP.

It does really suck though! Be kind to yourself as others have said, we’ve been dealt a particularly rough card and we all need to deal with it in our own way.

Oh also my BMI is 22 and I’ve been slowly losing weight just really to have something I can control that makes me feel better about myself but I’ve been wondering if I shouldn’t, I’ll look into it more. I know under 20 is not seen as ideal for fertility so I was aiming for 20.

Original poster

AliceScarlett · 03/07/2018 12:39

So hard isn't it. Other people get pregnant at a drop of a hat and we are thinking about the difference between 1 and 2 cups of tea :(

I've dropped my running to a slow 4-5 miles 3-4 times a week. That is the minimum I'm prepared to go to, I enjoy it, it's good for me, it's my social life, I'm not wreaking my 30s for something that might never happen. Over the last few years I've not booked holidays and changed jobs incase I got pregnant and now it's clear it's not a walk in the park I'm less inclined to change my life any more.

I'm just bitter and angry I think

OP posts:

kikisparks · 03/07/2018 13:32

Yeah I totally get you Alice. We need to have some things we enjoy or it becomes unbearable. I’m going on lots of holidays, albeit I only book them 6 months in advance so that even if I am pregnant I can still go. Going away a lot is the only thing keeping me sane. We might need to stop that if we need to save for ivf down the line but for now I can’t even think about that. The only thing that helped me survive AF arriving again this month after coming back from our holiday was booking another trip away.

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