Low reserve

[EightdaysaweekIloveu]

Hi, new to this forum. 39 years old, I have one child 5 years old, conceived naturally. I had a bad pregnancy and birth, took me a while to get over it. We have been trying for 2 years for no. 2, not focused just unprotected sex. I started tracking my ovulation properly about 6-7 mts ago, nothing happening so due to my age went to a fertility clinic for tests.

Basically I was told I have very low egg reserve, chances are slim, IVF was recommended but advised that it would only have a 15% chance resulting in pregnancy.

I'm floored. I'm angry at myself for being so blasé about it, convinced I'd always have no. 2. It's just sinking in that baby no. 2 may not happen, much higher chance of no baby than a baby.

Has anyone else been in this situation? Any positive stories?

Hello eight
There's a secondary infertility thread here which might be helpful.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/infertility/2888511-Secondary-infertility-support-group-here

Have you had tests to see if you are ovulating or not? Because low reserve is not no reserve, so if you are ovulating there's still a chance, and there may be some changes you can make to diet or lifestyle to help.
You would need the day 21 progesterone test (may not be day 21 depending on your cycle length).

Who told you 15% chance? A consultant at the clinic? Would you want a second opinion or consultation elsewhere (I appreciate you wouldn't want false hope).

I'd investigate these avenues first.
Did the clinic mention the possibility of donor eggs? Just putting it out there as the statistics may be more favourable. This is what I might be doing as a next step in my quest to become a parent. It might not be for you but there is also a donor conception topic, you could venture over and have a look.

Hi OP

Sorry you find yourself here. No success story - yet - but my story is very similar to yours. Almost 39, secondary infertility, I have a 4 year old conceived with no problem so did not expect to find myself at the point I’m at now, have been TTC for 2.5 years and am currently undergoing IVF. I also have low reserve, my AMH was a rather horrifying 1.5 and my FSH was 15. Are these the tests you have had done?

My clinic gave me a 28% chance of a live birth, I am doing a three cycle package with Create who specialise in treating women with low reserves.

I do find it hard to stay positive, because the odds aren’t in our favour, but I felt we had to at least give IVF a go. It’s been very tough with plenty of setbacks along the way. The uncertainty and unpredictability is the worst bit. I absolutely wish we had started our family sooner and maybe we wouldn’t be in this heartbreaking position, so I get you. As time passes there is more acceptance of the situation and sometimes I can manage to think of the positives of only having one child. But the truth is I would do anything to have another so for now we keep going and hope that somehow it will all work out.

If you can afford IVF maybe do some research of clinics. I think it will probably give you your best shot. Also look at some lifestyle stuff which improve egg quality eg supplements, diet, excercise. I do my best with these but try not to put life completely on hold by being completely angelic or I’d go mad. Acupuncture has helped me and sorted out my erratic and short cycles.

Good luck 💐

Thank you both CallmeNancy and JeNeBaguette for taking the time to respond to me, much appreciated.

Yes I have gotten all the tests done, so did my husband and I got an internal scan done, that is when the consultant was able to show me that I had low follicles, matched with the fact I ovulate early leads to a very low chance. I went to the leading fertility clinic in my area.

AndCallmeNancy my case sounds very similar to you. You are further down the road to me. Thanks for understanding. I told 2 friends and I found their responses condescending, even though I know they were being kind. They responded with 'Sure X had a baby at 44', 'the consultant can't be right that IVF only has 15% chance' I wanted to scream 'are you a trained fertility consultant?'

I'm usually the positive person in my relationship but this has knocked me. I appreciate there is still a small chance and grateful I have one child and other women have been years trying for a child but it still hurts.

My lifestyle is good, work can be stressful. I'm going to shake myself off, try again this month and the start IVF, suppose it will be for piece of mind to say I tried.

Thank you both again. Wishing you both good luck in your journeys. I'm going to take a look at the other threads.