It's just dawned on me that it's never going to happen.

[MsMalcontent]

Literally, this morning.
46 years old. Relatively recently divorced. The ex's gf is pregnant.
I knew I had fertility issues before I met him but guess throughout my marriage I was waiting for a "happy accident". Now the accident has happened and it's with the girl he cheated on me with. I'm never going to be a mother.

I'm so sorry xxx

Very sorry

That is heartbreaking for you, so sorry

I'm so very sorry, 😢

I'm so sorry

I would recommend joining gateway women, an online community for people in similar situations. It is very helpful in working through these issues and realising you are not alone. Its a bit of a faff to join up for the free trial but worth it in the end

I am sorry

I’m so sorry for the loss of your hopes. Be kind to yourself.

I'm sorry lass.

The previous responses are well meant, but rather suggest that the world has ended. It hasn’t. A world you had hoped might happen hasn’t - but life goes on and your life will be full of good things.

You are allowed to grieve. I found out I could have children and I grieved. It didn’t feel at all fair. It still hursts and Mother’s Day is a shitty time of year. But my life has moved on and I’ve changed, my job has changed and I’m doing things now that make me happy that I could not have done if I was a mother.

There are many different ways to mother. And a child is just another relationship. You are free to make many relationships with children and young people. You have not yet met everyone who is going to be an important part of your life, or you in their’s.

You are allowed to grieve, but please hold your head high. You are still someone with a great deal to offer. However much their situation feels like a punch in the guts, it’s not your life. It wasn’t done to hurt you.

Bloody auto correct! Couldn’t have children! Sorry.

I’m so sorry. Life is not fair. You can of course still find fulfilment and have such a happy life. You are a maternal person so it could help to explore mentoring, hearing kids read or other ways you can share that side of you, or helping with elderly people or perhaps animals to get in touch with that nurturing side of yourself X

If you wanted to, you could try ivf with donor eggs and sperm.

So sorry OP I couldnt think of anything worse.

Have you got a partner? Would u try fostering? Its obviously no comparison to having your own child but it certainly might help fill a hole and also doing something fufilling.

Thank you so much for all your kind messages.

I discovered Gateway last year and am forming a group of amazing friends through it. All different experiences, all different stages but really all amazing. I'm meeting them on Saturday actually.

It just feels so cruel that the life I thought I was going to have with my ex is happening but with someone else in that role not me. He knew about my fertility issues and swore he was fine with it, didn't want children of his own. In fact, when we split up I said to him she would want children as she was younger (of course) and he said at his age he wasn't interested. And now my time is over. I'm not going to try to do it on my own, I'm unlikely to conceive anyway. I didn't during 15 years with my ex. I just feel so bereft.

I'm so sorry :(