No idea where to go from here. If I am so perfect why doesn't it work?

[closephine85]

We have just had what has to be our final round of ivf for money reasons - I'm 7dp5dt on a natural FET and have been spotting since last night. It's the same as I always get so we are out.

I just don't know how to move forward. I'm not ready to give up (4 years of secondary infertility marked today of all days and 32 years old). Every test I have had I have been told 'looks good', your lining, AMH, FSH, ovulation etc etc are all 'perfect'.

DH has a low count, he has low morphology and slightly high DNA fragmentation but we produced 4... wait for it... 'perfect' blasts at IVF. So why didn't they implant?! Is it me after all?! For the last few years we've been told that it's his sperm causing the problem. But his count it low at about 13million p/ml however not completely obsolete. Shouldn't we have conceived naturally eventually with those numbers?!

We just don't know where to go now. We had agreed to try donor sperm via IUI next, but now I'm wavering and wondering if there is actually something wrong with me.

We can't really afford many more expensive tests... the ERA seems a little pointless if we then can't afford ivf anyway if it turned out my implantation window was out.

Literally the only thing I have come up with is that my TSH was 0.66 on my last test and although in the normal range, it seems to say online that it should be between 1-2.5 in relation to fertility. Also, I always spot for 2-5 days before AF, horrible brown sludgy stuff. Other than that I draw a blank but it's been four years now without a single BFP. It took us 7 months to conceive our son in 2011 so I think we must have been 'sub fertile' then too, we either just got lucky or whatever is going on has worsened.

I'm sorry for the waffle... I'm just hoping someone out there might have some ideas for me as it feels like the door is closing.

Please no replies saying it might be implantation spotting etc. I know my body and this is usual pre AF for me just a fraction earlier.

Are they going to give you a repeat blood test? Will help put you out of your misery and see what's going on..

Were the embryos tested for chromosome abnormalities? If not, perhaps look into PGD. good luck OP.

I really hope it's a positive sign for you. If the clinic is still telling you to keep on, they obviously think you could be pregnant!

For me personally, the progesterone stopped my period in our first cycle and I didn't come on until several days (7-10 I think - as the clinic predicted) after the clinic advised stopping progesterone (because I def wasn't pregnant).

Thanks all. I don't get another Beta until Wednesday as have been given hcg injections which can alter the result. We didn't have them PGS tested but my DH has high (ish) DNA fragmentation so I am thinking chromosome abnormalities could be the reason for this failing.

Whenever I've used progesterone from ovulation I think it's pretty much delayed it until I stopped taking it and then would get AF 1-2 days after stopping. However, slightly different this time as I didn't even start using it until 10dp5dt so it's new grounds for me as to how it works at this stage.

Beta much too low so that's that. I always thought I'd be pleased to at least get this far after so long without a BFP but right now I just feel totally exhausted and mentally drained. I suppose if we got as far as implantation then we can hold off on the ERA testing for now and I guess perhaps it points to chromosome abnormalities and that maybe donor sperm is a sensible next step. But I mean really, could it not have just worked?!

I'm so sorry

I’m so sorry, it’s so unfair.

My two pence worth - don’t bother with the ERA. You say this is secondary infertility, so it it is highly unlikely you’ve got an abnormal window of receptivity. Those who get the positive tests have never had a pregnancy.

You need to look into immune testing. I had 2 fairly easy IVF bfps but then couldn’t get pregnant again despite everything being perfect.

After 9 failed rounds, and being told ‘it was just bad luck’ I went for immune testing.

Of the 7 measures they tested for, I was off the scale on 5 of them. 2 doses of humira and then a lot of steroids during the cycle, and I got a BFP first cycle at the new Clinic.

No one knows what triggered the immune issues, but there was no chance I would have got pregnant again without them being treated.

Be kind to yourself this week

I'm so so sorry, you were on my mind yesterday and I kept checking for news This is just so unfair

Do you have one more frozen if I remember correctly? I have everything crossed that it's just been bad luck so far. Be kind to yourselves and take time to recover before planning next steps.

xx

Oh gosh I've just seen this close. I'm so sorry you're going through this, it's horrible

So sorry you're going through this. I hope I'm not too late to be helpful. I also suffered secondary infertility and can completely relate to your feeling that you're not ready to give up...it is so hard.

I did 6 failed cycles (2 fresh, one frozen with own eggs and the rest with DE). In desperation, I had the testing for "hidden infections" from Serum - you can ask for a test kit even if you aren't their patient and it can be done by post. I tested positive for two hidden infections and followed their antibiotic programme for a month.

I felt sure that my next cycle had worked - I had strong cramping sensations around five days post transfer and I was convinced it was implantation, but I got a BFN on test day. I described the sensations to my doctor when I went for the next cycle and he said that the lining of my uterus was unusually "mobile" when he had scanned me. He prescribed additional progesterone, in the form of patches, and also intra-muscular injections twice a week for two weeks.

That cycle worked - in fact, it worked with bells on. I had two embryos transferred and one split into identical twins with the result that we now have 16 mo triplets.

Wishing you a change of luck in all this....it's miserable x