Devastating news from the Doctor

[Welshgal78]

Me and my Dp have been trying to get pregnant for the last 7 months, we went to the GP for tests as I'm 38 nearly 39. Test results are in and my prostesterone is low but even worse she told us that my Dp has very low sperm count and they couldn't find even one single sperm that looks normal. But the fertility clinic won't see us until I loose over 2 and a half stone which will take time and time is not on our side. I feel like my dream of having a baby has been taken from us.

That must have been hard to hear and still difficult to process. Hoping someone with direct experience will comment shortly but I have friends who left having children until forties.

If you lost one pound per week you could see them in 6 Months. It sounds a long time but the whole infertility process is so long that in the tend scheme of things it's negligible.
We had icsi, 4 cycles over 5 years I know it's a horrendous time when you're in it.
💐

Low progesterone - you can be prescribed it to supplement your own. No need to worry on that score.

Receiving bad news is impossible. Be very kind to yourself today and give yourself time to process. I always feel like my entire world crashes down when small thing change, but actually the information you are given is power and you can use it to find solutions - of which there seem so few...

Get cracking on the weight loss. I've lost over a stone since April and not taking it ALL that seriously (joined weight watchers and try to stick to my points, but sometimes I go over and I'm fine with that). I reckon if you did something like slimming world and started really killing it in the gym it could be done within 4-5 months.

You might even find that with weight loss the progesterone issue improves.

There is so little about this that is in our control - so take control of what you can! I am having issues with the lack of control in this too... but take one day at a time. Set small goals and give yourself the tools to reach them. You can do it. Decide if you really want this to happen and then make it happen.

Sorry to hear that OP, I remember my initial fertility tests and I just burst out crying.

You and your husband have a good chance of conceiving through IVF with ICSI or if needs must, sperm donor.

To get this stage you of course have to lose weight. BMI has to be 30 or under for IVF. A friend of mine is on a shake diet, Lipotrim, from the pharmacy, its £37 a week and she's lost 2st 2lb in 4 weeks. It's doable.

Don't give up yet.

I wonder how long the appt would take to come through? If you've a decent amount to lose, the first 5/8 lbs will drop quickly and then a steady 2lb per week is definitely do-able.
Would you be able to get some evidence (either a slimming club booklet or a print out from Boots weighing machine) for your weight now and make the appt soon so they can see you are losing weight and committed to doing so?

People seem to lose weight well on The 8 week blood sugar diet (Michael Moseley)There`s a support group on Facebook.Good luck.

I can understand your devastation. But don't give up. And don't let it come between you and DP.

Have you successfully dieted before? Do you prefer groups, solo, strict plans or a mix of healthy eating/exercise? Make a plan to get cracking on the weight loss. Make sure you're on the list for an appointment in the meantime.

You can lose the weight, it'll give you the best chance of getting the help you need to conceive. Good luck

The appointment times can take 2/3 months so get started. Lose a stone this month and go back and see dr showing him your goal of a pound a week. Ask for referral.

If you can go private you'll get seen in 6 weeks. You can lose a stone by then.

Nhs may not refer once you hit 40.

That's shit. Can you afford to go for a private assessment? Private clinics often treat patients at bmi 35, while the NHS want bmi 30.

Thank you for all your messages, lots of great support and advice

Agree with all that has been said. I'm a GP and I usually don't refer until the patient has hit the BMI target because - to be quite honest - 95% don't lose weight. But, if you had 2.5 stone to lose and you came back to me having lost half of it and asking for a referral now on the condition that you'll continue and lose the rest, I'd be happy to do that, especially given that time isn't on your side. good luck with it all

Have you tried the Cambridge Diet? I went on it at the start of the year and lost 10lbs in the first week, 7lbs in the second. It took me less than 2 months to loose 2 stone. Its very very difficult as all I was having was 3 shakes a day. Just remember complete all 6 stages as you will pile the weight back on if you just go back to what you ate before. The foods contain a high amount of vitamin a so better to complete it a few weeks before TTC again.

Good Luck and keep us updated!

Sorry to hear all your problems welshgal. It can be crushing when you hear news like that. When I started my journey I knew they would pick on my weight, my bmi was 33.8. I embarked on a very low calorie diet to lose the weight. Though it was great and I starting losing weight rapidly, unbeknown to me, was the impact it was having on my fertility. Before I started the VLCD, I could feel my ovaries (if that makes sense) but as I went on with the diet I couldn't feel them and all the ovulation tests I took came back negative. I did some research and found that vlcd diets, though fantastic to help you lose weight and thus improve fertility in the long run, can have a damaging impact in the short term. I stopped the VLCD and started a healthier plan, ensuring I ate properly, fresh fruits and veg, lots of water, ensuring I go for a half hour walk after my main meals, eating 6 times a day. I have lost 1 st and 7 pounds so my bmi is now 29.05, I have a long way to go but am now able to incorporate exercise into my regime. Stick at it and you will get there.

Went to the Dr's today because I've got a urine infection, while I was there is asked her to clarify the requirements of being eligible for IVF on the NHS in Wales and it was not good news!! Apparently they've tightened the rules. Now they won't accept anyone over 38 and a half years old and I'm 39 in two months so I'm already too old to qualify and I'd probably be over 39 by the time I've got to the right BMI. So my dr has said I'll never be able to have IVF on the NHS and I could never afford to go private, so basically it's going to take a miracle to get pregnant and have a child with my DP ;(

Welshgal try not to get too disheartened. I know it's easier said than done. There are loads of success stories of women having babies when they are 40. Have they investigated your DP low count?

That must be so disappointing. You need to take a bit of time to get used to it and then think about your options. Can you move to an area with funding? Could you afford cheaper treatment abroad? Could you consider AI with a sperm donor? Would your parents pay for treatment?