Feeling ridiculous but so envious of Jools and Jamie Oliver

[FeelingRidiculousBut]

Have name changed as this is clearly pathetic, but I'm feeling SO envious of Jools and Jamie Oliver.

I look at the pics of them with their five children, brimming with happiness, and my heart just aches.

I am 39, my husband has male factor infertility, we've tried IVF. It just isn't happening.

I imagine their house full of laughter and joy and Christmases and birthdays.

Our house is so quiet.

I'm tearing up as I write this, but I know it's pathetic.

Does anyone else understand / feel this way when they see pics like this of big families?

My husband would prefer to adopt when he says 'there are already kids out there' etc (rather than donation) so I guess I'm just grieving a biological child.

Sorry but this is not a reason to give up having your own child. Why not adopt AND have a baby with donor sperm? I find it unsettling that your DP would prefer that you are denied pregnancy and your own baby because he is infertile. Sorry if this sounds harsh but I think women are too quick to give up their right to happiness and what they want in life for men.

I understand