IVF

[Sapph1e]

Hi guys,

My sister is about to start IVF treatment and I'm putting together a pack of information for her as a kind of gift (it's her first cycle). I'm just wondering what sort of stuff prospective/actual IVF patients want to read about? Clearly there are the obvious things, but never having gone through it myself, it would be good to get a fresh perspective. If you feel that you could reply, that would be great :) Thank you.

Hi, you sound like a lovely sister and a gift i am sure would be appreciated but I would leave it to her to get the relevant info from the clinic. Everyone's medicsl situation is different and you wouldn't want to give her the wrong information which may be incorrect or misleading or not apply to her situation. She will get info overload from the clinic anyway believe me! is there something else you could give her, a good book, magazines, flowers etc?

Hi Heels :)

Thank you for your message. I didn't so much mean medical info as other peoples' stories, common things that are worried about, stuff like that. She's expressed an interest in reading around the subject as much as she can and she has a very busy work life (marine biologist) so I just thought I'd help her out :)

Does that sound OK or am I over-stepping the mark??

You can get a lot of books about IVF on amazon some of which are diary formats that she may find helpful/interesting

I agree that maybe some other magazines/books too not about ivf would be good for when she gets 'information overload' and wants to distract herself from it all. Perhaps a voucher for a treatment somewhere to help with relaxation maybe a massage or manicure.

I guess a published book would be ok but I would steer away from anything else on the info side of things. Things to take my mind off it were what I wanted! A gripping novel was good for this.

I think there are some books available, although I've never read any I would appreciate and read one if someone gave me it. Other than that all of my info is from the clinic and is tailored to our treatment.

Tbh the only thing that I want to read about are things that might improve my chances of success. I don't care much about anything else! So diet tips, studies about success rates, relaxation techniques, benefits of particular holistic therapies, that sort of thing?

Other than that I suppose some people might want to read about the history, science or ethics of ivf. If your sister has a science background she might find that interesting. Although on an abstract level I'm interested in those things, when actually going through it, that goes out the window. I just want it to work.

If you want to help once treatment starts, I think practical things are what I personally would like. Occasional visits where you bring over the dinner ready-made to be heated up, lifts to the hospital, coming round and rather than being waited on, help change the bed, fill the dishwasher and then leave me in peace, texts to ask how I'm (honestly) feeling, that sort of thing? It all depends on her personality and how she's feeling once the treatment starts but lots of people feel really tired and a bit shitty, so gently helping make her life a bit easier might be good? That's what I'd want from my sister, if she wasn't heavily pregnant...

Hope that helps you sound like a nice sister

You sound like a lovely sister and I'm sure your support is a massive gift to her already.

It's difficult to have an opinion here because I obviously don't know your relationship and can only really give my perspective.

IVF is an incredibly personal and hard journey and despite support and handholding it can feel very lonely at times because each journey is so unique and results differ so greatly.

I also think that because it is her first time, she should maybe restrict her research a little as it can be very overwhelming. Dietary advice and tips yes, but maybe just point her to this site and she will gleam a lot of helpful knowledge. I personally just wanted to get on with it and try not to obsess and science is actually pretty bloody annoying at times because even if with perfect conditions etc, sometimes it's just in the laps of the gods (so to speak - not religiously!)

I second another poster about a more practical gift maybe - massage etc, ivf diet cook book (not sure if one even exists).

Anyhow, you know your sis best and you'll do whats right and wish you lots of luck.