I think it might be time to admit defeat. So sad.

[Hurricaneinateacup]

Two failed ivf cycles this year with an original diagnosis of mfi.

However consultant now thinks the problem is me as apparently it only takes one sperm - even though we have motility of 15% and morphology of 1%. He thinks it could be implantation.
The consultant wants me to have a lap which I will have to have privately through my health insurance. Health insurance won't pay for fertility reasons so consultant has advised me to lie to gp and say I have endometriosis symptoms which I'm not going to do.
Looked instead at going abroad for donor treatment but needed smear first in line with their regulations. Went today (privately again can't have on nhs) and saw same consultant as for ivf.

Smear was total agony and caused me to bleed. Before the test had even started. I've had egg transfer using a speculum and it's been fine but as soon as he put it in it was agony and bleeding started.
Consultant said this is probably a polyp which may or may not be cancerous and has said before proceeding I need to have a hysteroscopy, a hycosy and a lap and I need to see if the insurance will pay.

I'm absolutely at my wit's end. We started with male factor and now have:
Endometriosis
Possibly cancerous polyps

It obviously just isn't meant to be is it? I can't keep taking all this time off work. I think this is it for us.

[Hurricaneinateacup]

It's true that day 3 six cells can work. But 8 cells are better. There's not that much success with 6 cells. The fragmentation was ok actually. The embryos were just slow.

[Hurricaneinateacup]

Second cycle dh's sperm were slightly more motile but still only 2% morphology so they said we could try ivf rather than icsi in case my eggs don't like being icsi'd. So we did half and half.
The fertilisation rate was the same but all of the ivf ones stopped developing at 2 or 3 cells. So I kind of feel like those 5 eggs were wasted. The icsi ones did much better.

[Hurricaneinateacup]

You see quite a number of people who've had failed ivf then get pregnant with donor treatment.

We started with male factor and now may or may not have:

Shit eggs
Endometriosis
Implantation problems
Polyps

Argh. Just argh.

[naty1]

Though ive seen 2 people get bfn with donor with the same or less fertilisation. Its because clinics cant identify the issue. And they were both icsi.
Strange less cells with ivf than icsi ones. Youd think it would tell clinic something.
What size follicles did you have at trigger?
I think for me my follicles need to be 20mm to get a good egg,

[Hurricaneinateacup]

The follicles were pretty good sizes I seem to remember.
I've looked online and it says implantation issues should be considered after at least three failed cycles were at least four good embryos have been transferred over those cycles.
Given that we've only had one embryo more then 6 cells at day 3 I don't think that's us.

Yes the clinic said if we tried again they would do entirely icsi as seemingly even the sperm which managed to fertilise the egg naturally obviously weren't great. They said that both egg and sperm are important from day one but I don't know how true that is.

[Hurricaneinateacup]

I suppose I'm trying to weigh up if I really need all those tests. I'm type 1 diabetic - very well controlled - but it adds in extra problems when having anaesthetics etc.

I think if I conclude that I do then we will just give up because I really don't want them.
Of course if smear shows anything strange I will have further treatment for that.

[Smidge001]

Hi wistful would you mind telling me what you were given for the immune issues? I have had the tests and been told I have high NK cells (no surprise really as my family have many immune issues). I have been given clexane, an anticoagulant, but my doctor wasn't particularly keen to try me on prednisone (steroid) because of higher risks associated. I would be interested to hear what you took.

Thanks

[worriedmum100]

I hear you on the escalation of issues thing.

Within a year we went from "you're both fine but IUI will give you a boost" followed by pregnancy and miscarriage to....you have a pocket of fluid on your c section a scar which needs looking at...to endometriosis diagnosis ....laporoscopy. ...pregnancy....missed miscarriage....ERPC....repeat ERPC....3D scan showing .."A mass of some kind so you need a hysteroscopy and resection".

At that point I got some balls and refused to be operated on yet again. Every time someone does something it creates a new problem.

I think some doctors just see a womb with issues and forget there's a person involved too. I felt like I was just having things done to me and was being totally passive because I was so desperate to find the "problem" and solve it.

I've now put a halt to everything until I see a top expert in uterine surgery. I know I'm very lucky that we can afford to do that. But after this last year I feel really strongly about the lack of proper information and explanation and the throwing around of frightening words like "cancer" and "mass" and never feeling like anyone looks at the whole picture.

Sorry that turned into a rant but the way women's gynaecological issues are treated pisses me off! We deserve better.

I hope you make some progress OP. I'm not saying you haven't already and you may not have the fight left but it really helped me to take back some control and start making a nuisance of yourself until you get proper answers.

Good luck. X