Anyone starting IVF soon? Join me (2)

[purplemeggie]

I see we've filled up the thread and thought I'd better start another one. How's everyone doing?

Hi Frazoz, the doctor pretty much left it up to us to decide on if we wanted one or two transferred. He was fine with either option.

Ultimately we decided we were less afraid of the possibility of a higher risk pregnancy and twins than we were of a potential BFN (or two) and the price of two frozen cycles!

So really finances were the deciding factor for us. I'm in the US, and although my insurance company is very good and pays for some stuff, there is a lot we have had to fund ourselves. If this FET cycle fails then we've got enough money saved for one more fresh cycle and could probably manage to run to another FET too if that didn't work, but after that we won't really be able to afford any more goes - barring lottery win, inheritance, unexpected windfall etc.

Glad to hear you've roped in your husband as an injection giver! That should make it easier if you can just shut your eyes and try to pretend it isn't happening.

Hen - whether or not they recommend long or short protocol seems to depend on a combination of AMH levels and age, if I understand it properly. I am 41 and my AMH at the outset was 14 (which I'm led to believe is pretty respectable for an old bird!). That put me on the borderline of long and short protocol for my clinic, so they tried a long protocol for my first cycle. My second full cycle was a short protocol as they thought I might respond better.

They will no doubt have decided that with your particular age/AMH levels that you are more likely to respond well in a short protocol, I'm not sure from what you've said whether your IVF is NHS funded - I'm guessing it probably is from your age - but if not, the added bonus with short protocol is that it's a bit cheaper as you don't need nearly so many drugs - I think my short protocol was about £500 less.

I'm chuckling at the thought of all you brave ladies letting your DHs do your injections. Mr Purple has the biggest hands in the world and the thought of him trying to do something so delicate as administer an injection with them is far more terrifying to me than the thought of stabbing myself repeatedly in the belly!!!

Shell thanks for your comments on the injections I'm clearly just making too much of it. It's not a typo I'm at high risk of OHSS I've been told that when I have my base scan day 3 that they may decide to lower my Gonal F dose from 150 to something lower. Due to this I also need to have another scan day 7 as it may need changing again and I'll need scans 3/4 days of cycle days 9/10/11/12 as they said I'd be really ill and risk the treatment failing as there will be too many eggs. If we weren't trying for our first I'd think about egg sharing, they also said that my Husbands will eventually be infertile and that they can already see that his body is trying very hard to push the sperm that's made out so they said when he doesn't have to shave for a week that means he's infertile hence the reason we had to do a back-up freeze.....quite difficult to hear when he's only 33.

Battery I'm not driving either to be honest my Husband is driving me hence the reason the car park is such an issue....men!! i think he feels slightly guilty that I'm the one that has to go through all the invasive procedures because of his fertility issues so that's his way of making it up to me, that and he's very nosy and loved looking at the scan whilst they did the first scan and likes to make inappropriate comments

I think and I'm sure I could be wrong but I think it's the protocol your on that means you don't down reg as it's based on your normal cycle so it's a short protocol which is what I'm doing. I think it's called mild ivf/ICSI or antagonist Ivf/ICSI.

I'm not sure why they have said you need ICSI, I know we have to as my Husbands sperm is so low they literally can only find a few and they couldn't even give us the other results for mot and morp there are so few. I would ask the question if it was me I think it's always better to ask then have it on your mind.

I've told my Mum but we don't have a great relationship and she lives 4 hrs away and two friends one that got pregnant the first time she tried and the other has been pregnant 5 times, men only need to look at her and she's fallen. I feel exactly the same actually having people that know what your talking about is great. I find that when I do talk about it, the conversation quickly turns into talking about children which when you don't have one is pretty tough going.

GoBig thanks for your comments I think we will probably ask the question if/when we get to egg collection and see if they have any stats.

I see the benefits of your healthcare system we don't even have private health insurance that covers fertility treatment only diagnosis so this first cycle is costing us approx £7,000 and that's cheap only because I need so few drugs.

Did you find the FET cycle a lot easier on your body and stress levels at all?

I'm also wondering what people have decided with regards to taking time off work I'm thinking ER day plus one day and then ET day then maybe working from home for 1-2 days.

Youch! Where are you Frazoz (apologies if you've already said...) We've had to pay for every stage of this, because I don't meet the criteria for NHS funding (I'm one year too old, plus we have a ds, either of these factors would disqualify us) - our first fresh cycle was about £5,500 on a long protocol, FET cost about £2000, including freezing, thawing, all drugs and transfer and short protocol cycle cost about £4500, I think.

I didn't find the FET significantly different...I have noticed that I had a more cumulative effect each time....mostly emotional, so may be partly that the stakes feel higher each time so the stress is more, but I was talking to a friend today who is also doing IVF and she said that she's found each one has made her shorter tempered, too.

I didn't need to take time off after ER/EC (other than the day itself), but I did take time off after ET, because you want to know that you've given yourself the best chance. I didn't go back to work for 5 days afterwards (including weekends) - meaning that I took off 3 working days each time.

I'm speaking to my cousin tomorrow about egg donation....keep your fingers crossed for me....

Purple I'm from Hampshire but our clinic is Southampton with the screening tests, consultation, back-up freeze, drugs and ICSI. I originally thought it was going to be nearer £8.5k as I thought hubby would need sperm retrieval procedure so was quite pleased when they said he didn't need it.

I think I'll just have to see how things go as I can work from home and my boss knows it shouldn't be too much of an issue just difficult with the job I have which in itself is quite stressful and the travelling isn't always easy.

I hope everything goes ok for you tomorrow....my fingers are crossed!!

Thank you - I'll let you all know how I get on.

We're not far from each other...I'm just over the Surrey border...

Sooooo...
....my cousin's daughter has re-iterated her offer to donate eggs, which is amazing. I'm trying not to let myself get carried away at this stage, as there is a way to go...I think we all have to have counselling for starters. But I am allowing myself to "try it on" as a possibility and that feels good.

Purple that's great news. It definitely worth exploring, that's for sure. Counselling is a good idea and might help you work out all the 'what if's'. I'm intrigued to see how you get on.
I can't decide how I would feel about knowing the donor - it's great in a lot of ways, but complicated too. Wow, lots for you to think about!

Yes, there's an awful lot to think about!

It's a funny one though, knowing the donor. I see a fair bit of my cousin - we're close, we talk fairly frequently and see each other two or three times a year, but I haven't seen her daughter in ages, so she wouldn't be very present in our lives. I'm still getting my head around it...

Purple, that is an amazingly generous offer of your cousins daughter. After pinning hopes on two IVF's and an FET, it must require a real mindshift but I am glad to hear that 'trying it on' at least feels good.

Battery, hope the Dr can provide some insight as to why you need ICSI to put your mind at ease. I am curious too so you will have to let me know. The count definitely seems low but the motility is amazing and if the morphology is good, at least the few he does produce are great. Better than having lots more and they are all bad (as in my hubbys case). I can imagine in a natural cycle 9mil/ml might be low as they have to make there way from the cervix to the egg and many die along the way, but when they are all poured into a petri dish with eggs, you would think 9ml/ml would be plenty.

Fraz, I never knew that being prem caused male infertility. Is it rude to ask just how prem he was? I am always irritated by my husbands beard prickling me when he doesn't shave... maybe now you are giving me a new found appreciation... albeit all the ones he does produce are duds. Here's hoping my next ICSI cycle will cure all.

Today is CD6 of my cycle prior to IVF. Really being good diet wise now. I have seen when I didn't take Aspirin from days 1-15 for a cycle prior to IVF that my day 2 AFC the following IVF cycle was only 5. When I did take Aspirin from days 1-19 for a cycle prior to IVF, my day 2 AFC the following IVF cycle was 19. So I have seen first hand that right now is the time when my follicles are preparing themselves for my next cycle so I am being very good and throwing everything at it.

Purple I think it's amazing that your cousin would do that for you and you have that relationship, also that you and your hubby feel comfortable undertaking this.

Shell my hubby was six weeks prem he was born with undescended testies and the consultant informed his parents they would eventually drop. He was six and his parents took him back to the hospital and the consultant at the time told them he would have been forty and they still wouldn't have dropped.

It does annoy that he was born with this issue and we still aren't able to get NHS funding, doesn't seem fair.

I'm currently Day 15 and keep counting down the days till I can start the Gonal....going slowly!!

Should be receiving the delivery of the injections today so will seem more real then.

Can I ask whether you are specifically taking aspirin to get more follicles and did your consultant recommend this?

I hope your next cycle is successful....I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Frazoz- we were referred on nhs on the basis of male infertility. Relatively quickly , appt within 4mths of sperm test. We had been ttc around 1.5 yrs by then. I think though if the test had shown at 6m even the same thing we would have been referred straight away due to the severity as they could hardly say keep trying(which they would have done with just my pcos)
Do you mean the waiting lists would put you over the age limit?
Did they tell his parents there could be an issue so he could get checked?

Wow Purple how kind of her, that must take quite a shift in mindset though - how do you feel about it?

Fraz That is so unfortunate, how is he doing? I had to laugh at him making inappropriate comments re scanning - the Lister supplied me with my first few day's worth of Gonal-f. I showed it to him and he said "he he he - that word looks like 'Gonads'' with much Beavis & Butthead style chuckling

Sounds like we live quite close to one another too - I am quite close to Hampshire too...

Re the ICSI comment, DH had the SA done locally, so it wasn't actually the Lister who said that, was the embryologist who performed the test. I've been thinking this over and actually feel a bit better that this might be the cause of our problems, although it does seem odd - we have been trying for aaaaages so you would think that statistically at least one of the fellas would have made it to the egg?

Anyway, finding this out just as we are about to embark on IVF is not so bad. Had we found out while we still had hopes of natural conception, that would have been quite a lot harder, I think.

Well, still no AF, but I think she is heading my way tomorrow so have booked my baseline scan for Monday morning. The local BMI hospital have (so kindly) arranged for their consultant gynaecologist to do my monitoring at no additional cost. Really quite chuffed as I was fully expecting (and am paying for) whichever sonographer happened to be available at the time to be actually doing them.

Have ordered my drugs and will be collecting them tomorrow. Yikes, all feeling a bit real now

NB Frazoz I showed it to my DH, not yours!

Naty we had this confirmed back in Aug and the Hosptial wrote to the CCG explaining our circumstances haven't heard a thing since, at the same time we were waiting for a referral to a see an urologist and haven't heard back about that either so honestly at this moment in time I'm pleased we didn't wait. The issue is our CCG (North Hampshire) require you to have been ttcing for 3yrs and you can't be over 35yrs old. They didn't tell his parents he would have any issues, when he told his Dad about the issue he cried :-(

Battery he's doing ok hes now in total positive mode which normally I'd be chuffed about but if this doesn't work I'm really worried how he will cope. I asked him what he wanted for Xmas the other day and he said a baby!!

It must be man humour as they seem to find funny things no matter the situation and when there is nothing funny God knows what he's going to be like with the injections.....he's already given me a glimpse by getting down by the side of the bed asked me to pretend to be asleep and woke me up whilst holding a "pretend" needle.....so dramatic my husband.

I know with ICSI that they just need a normal head and nothing else and with ivf you still need a certain about of sperm. I really didn't want ICSI as I'd read about there being abnormalities but the consultant explained that they have changed where they stick the needle in now away from where the chromosomes are. I originally wanted EEVA but the consultant said its not worth having on our first try and if this didn't work we could have it next time....not sure if this is the right decision?

Got our injections today the boxes were huge I was a little shocked luckily most of it was packaging coz I was thinking we need a bigger fridge.

Let me know how you get on with your baseline scan I'd be really interested to find out your experience.

Def couldn't be my Husband he's in China

Happy Halloween everyone ????

I can vaguely understand the over 35 due to possibly less success. But 3 yrs that is such a long time. Also something if people realise they would possibly lie. But makes no sense as if you find a low count you arent going to wait 2 yrs while it could get worse (or better). I think my area was 3 yrs ttc if unexplained but probably could have done iui in that time if applicable.
Its awful they dont tell the parents, it looks like they have learnt from experience and operate sooner now

What is EEVA?

Wow...in Surrey it's over 40....and we're only just into Surrey....amazing the difference a couple of miles can make. I think 35's a bit brutal....lots of people don't even realise they have a problem until after then...

Frazoz - you probably don't need to keep it all in the fridge, do you? The only thing I had to keep in the fridge was Gonal F until it was opened (which I thought was weird - you'd expect it to be the other way around) - and the trigger shot, which I didn't get until nearer the time. Having said that, I was on a mix of Gonal F and Menopur (which def doesn't need to be kept cold), - I guess if you're on Gonal F for the whole of your stims, you might need a bit more fridge space...

*Shellster - yes, it is an amazingly kind offer from my cousin's daughter. She's quite an extraordinary young woman. Not such a shift of mindspace for dh and me though - you know we always said 2 fresh cycles plus any "bonus" frosties, and that's what we did. My cousin told me ages ago - possibly even before we did IVF that her daughter had said she'd donate eggs if we wanted them, and I wasn't ready to discuss it at that time, so we just said "thank you very much, but we're not there yet..." - so the idea was planted as it were, and it's always been a potential plan B.

Hi Naty - I remember you from a previous thread....am I right in thinking that you went abroad for DE, or am I confusing you with someone else?

Hey gang! And welcome to new members (I feel silly saying that as I'm only just catching up on this new thread -- thanks, Purple, for starting it up!)

So I'm Day 6 on my new cycle I started my period just as a bunch of GHs were heading into town for the weekend to meet the new nephew. I didn't go in the end, as I had a stonking great cold to boot. But I did get hugely emotional when one of my SILs started banging on about ovaries popping at the cuteness and teasing my DH about whether he had got broody when holding him she doesn't know we've even been trying let alone IVFing, so it was obliviousness rather than insensitivity. My other SIL (not the new mum so many SILs!) immediately noticed and we ended up having a really good chat about things, as she's miscarried. Although, she did whip out the old 'You just need to relax and stop caring and it will happen' chestnut I really wish people would stop saying that. It makes me so stabby.

Purple and Annie, I just wanted to reiterate how sorry I am your cycles didn't work out. Purple, your cousin sounds amazing! Win-win, definitely.

Inconceivable, I think you need to change your name! Congratulations!! Please, please keep us all posted. The graduates of this thread give us all hope.

Hope everyone else is plump of womb lining and bursting of follicle.

Hey Emma welcome back! I know what you mean about the 'relax and it will happen' statement, I had to go for a blood test at the GP surgery last week and the nurse actually said that to me....arrgh! A trained medical professional. She said we should just go away for a romantic weekend and let nature take care of it. Maybe I'll take her advice and save thousands of pounds on IVF, and just do a weekend in Blackpool instead....

Emma & Blue, I would have seen red when I got that relax and it will happen comment. Oh, and stay off those buses Blue!

Realise you've still got a lot of steps ahead Purple, but seems like a good thing that the offer was mentioned at the start so the seed could start to subconsciously be implanted as a plan B. Your cousin sounds on board too which is amazing.

Fraz, I don't mind you asking any questions at all. I started taking Aspirin after reading a study that showed it doubled the number of eggs collected. Bot my old and new IVF Dr have never heard of it, but weren't against me doing it. I can definitely see the difference! But you have to be careful. I continued taking it during an IVF cycle and despite starting with 16 follicles on day 2 instead of the usual 5-6, but only 3 responded to the drugs. Turns out Aspirin can interfere with follicle growth. So last IVF I took it up until day 20 of the cycle prior to IVF and then I had lots of the follicles growing - but the trigger injection went wrong instead - so now repeating the same Aspirin up until day 20 this cycle to try IVF next cycle. That was a bit of a long explanation but just don't want you taking Aspirin willy nilly and finding out the expensive way that it can have negative effects too.

Fraz, is it just that you haven't tried long enough which makes you not qualify for NHS? I am in Australia so not familiar with NHS but that seems ridiculous.

In the meantime, I shall continue to count down with you.

Hello blue and Emma and everyone else...

I'm laughing, plump of womb lining and burying of follicle - nobody has ever wished me that before!

frazoz Awww at the baby for Christmas comment, I have everything crossed for you...DH is fairly laid back about the whole thing. When we married, I was unsure about having DCs at all but he agreed to leave the decision to me and would be happy either way.

So - day 1 is here (in all it's glory!) and we are good to go!

Oddly, I have been told that the gonal f doesn't need to be kept in the fridge, and will be fine for 28 days at room temp - only the trigger shot needs refrigerating.

We're hoping not to need ICSI too, I think the risk of abnormalities comes from the fact that the natural sperm selection process is completely bypassed. In 'normal' conception, only the best sperm will make the journey and then penetrate the egg. Even in conventional ivf, I guess of the many sperm that surround the egg, again only the best will penetrate the shell. No matter how skilled the embryologist, or whether they use IMSI to select the best looking sperm, I imagine it is no substitute for just putting them in a race and seeing which one wins...

I know there are so many hurdles to overcome before we get there, but I'm in such a quandary about whether to transfer one or two blasts if we get the choice. I'm leaning towards two, but the risk of Cerebral Palsy really jumps in twin pregnancies and I'm not sure which risk worries me more, that, or a failed cycle.

It's such a tough moral one, sometimes I think fuck it, I'll do anything to have a baby, but I also think I owe a duty of care to any theoretical baby so would be better to put myself through another cycle of ivf rather than risk a disabled child. It's a hard one.

this is written from my naive first time ivf'er perspective. I have a horrible feeling I won't even get to that stage...

We're self-funding, we don't qualify as I am over 35 (by about 3weeks) and DH has children from his first marriage. We are very in the very fortunate position to be able to afford the treatment, it doesn't sit easily with me though - I really hate the idea that couples in our position who can't afford to self-fund won't be able to even try. It's horribly elitist and very unfair.

In a way, it's been quite an easy journey so far, will have been under 2 weeks from first appointment at the Lister to starting stims. As long as things go well, looking at EC either sat 15th/sun 16.

I hope everyone else is well and where they want to be in their cycles?

P.s. I wonder if any if you experienced ivf'ers could answer a question for me please?

When I go for my scan on Monday, will they find follicles already? And is that going to be the number that they have to play with (so to speak) for this cycle?

Will the gonal f make more follicles appear, or just cause all of the ones already there to produce mature eggs?

Apologies for my ignorance!

Purple nope not me with donor. I have been around the infertility board since my Jan cycle fail. Aug cancellation (3 eggs) and now 2ww taking forever.
I think my clinic only allows 1 blast at 35.
They said 1 embryo day 3 but in practice it was dependent on top quality - i had an a/b 8 cell and they let me put the 10 cell a/b back too - without me having to request though i was going to
I think they use a bit of common sense ie i only had 2 good embryos the rest didnt end up making freeze, each cycle similar low fert rates and i had a previous failure with 'ok'- b 8cell and b/c 6 cell.

If i had 3 blasts i would probably put 1 back and freeze the 2 as it makes freezing more worthwhile. If it was nhs i would be fine with freezing just 1. I guess grading, age, previous failure, whether you got ohss.

Hi there. My name is Paola, We have been trying conceiving for an year but last time we met the specialist she strongly advised us to start Ivf due to my age (just turn 39). I am waiting for the tube scan results and On the 5th we will meet the doctor again to start talking about Ivf but I have already fallen into the grasp of anxiety and pressure. More I read around more I feel as my chances are not as high as I hoped. I found this post and it makes me feel less lonely, also cause I feel very lonely by myself already as I am Italian and I miss the support of my girlfriends. I also wish good luck to who is more ahead in the process !!!!