Almost 4 years TTC and not a sniff of BFP

[rainbowbreeze123]

Im 34, were doing our 2nd round of IVF in the new year self-funded were in the unexplained category. Meanwhile my best friend finishes work today for maternity leave, this is her 2nd baby - they started TTC at around the same time as us. In all that time ive not had 1 BFP

I want to have a determined im not giving up attitude but right now im just really fed up with it all. Anyone got any positivity going spare ??

Hi Rainbow.

I don't have any particular words of wisdom but, from one 1980 baby to (I assume?) another, wanted to wish you well. I have those fed up "it'll never work" moments - sometimes they last days. I allow myself the odd bit of resentment to those who have it so easy with the baby making, but I counter it with the reminder that I wouldn't want to make a baby with any of their husbands anyway!

Also, my DH often comforts me by saying it's just a journey - we're going to have a family, it's just that we've taken the long route to get there. We're not sure how much longer the route will be, but we're confident we'll get there eventually.

And we can enjoy the stroll (hormone-induced at times!), just the two of us, while we get there. Yes, there's the obvious downsides of fertility treatment, but there are plus sides being just a couple for a while longer. We can have romantic dinners without babysitters, a walk by the canal without worrying about a toddler falling in, lie-in on a sunday morning without a screaming baby demanding attention. And recently we treated ourselves to a weekend in Paris, and sat on the steps of the Montmartre watching couples carrying buggies up hundreds of stairs to get to the top. It's not so bad being just the two of us for a little while longer

Best of luck with your journey - I hope you're on the final stretch with the finish line in sight.

Thanks for your lovely message Rumplestrumpet I am indeed a fellow 1980 baby

You have a nice way of looking at the situation, we do try and make the most of our temporary family situation doing things we couldnt do with a baby. Including going out with our respective friends tomorrow, couldnt do that with a baby

Good luck to you also ! x