Fertility problems and depression

[sarah00001]

Hi, I had an ectopic pregnancy in January 2013 which caused me to be very depressed. I became pregnant again in June 2013 but it had an early miscarriage. In March this year I discovered I was pregnant for a third time, but its another ectopic in my other tube. I will now be having IVF in a few months time.

I feel very, very low at the moment and I wondered if anyone else had depression as a result of fertility problems and if so, how do you deal with it?

Thank you, Sarah

Hi Sarah,

I'm really sorry to hear you have been going through a tough time. We have been ttc for 3 years, had an iui that worked but ended in miscarriage, then two more failed iuis. After this miscarriage I was so sad, didn't know how life could be so cruel. I don't think I've had depression but there have been times when I just feel so sad & down and like I want to hide away from the world.

I try to remember that it's normal to feel this way, treat myself to something nice, go out with friends or dh. I find it useful to always have something to look forward to as well. Another thing that makes me feel better is always gave a plan of action in place, ie we are starting down regging for ivf of Sunday! Exercise also helps me realise abit of stress.

Do you have anyone you can talk too? If not it might be worth contacting your clinic and seeing if you can have some counselling. Good luck and I hope your feeling better soon x

Hi there op

Hello again happily [waves]

Can't really offer much advice but wanted to say you are not alone. I'm in bits today as AF has arrived after second IUI. Been ttc dc2 for 2years. Like happily my first IUI worked but ended in miscarriage. I feel very very low today. Ectopics must be awful and it must feel so unfair to happen to you twice.

I dont know about you but I also feel angry. Its taken 2 years and huge amounts of money for someone to finally diagnose me with endometriosis. I'm scheduled for surgery in 10 days but a big part of me was hoping I wouldn't have to go through it if this IUI worked. It hasn't so I have to. I can't see any positives today. Dc2 feels like a million miles away. I'm a rubbish mum to DS because I'm so sad and feel so guilty that he isn't enough.

Sorry, that turned into a rant all about me. I don't know what the answer is. Trying to think positively and having other things to focus on helps but some days you just have to allow yourself to feel like crap about it all.

God I really aren't my help am I!
X

worriedmum, it's so nice to hear you echo the exact words of how I feel. I too have DC1 and feel like I don't love him enough for being so desperate and focused on having a 2nd.

Wish I had the answer for yu sarah. I went to the counselor at my IVF clinic thinking they are going to give me the answer to your question on how to cope in this situation. Turns out there isn't one. I can only hope for you that obviously you and hubby make viable embryos (unlike us as hubby has abnormal sperm) but for whatever reason your tubes were a bit scarred and the embryo couldn't travel through. So you obviously have the ability make a perfect embryo and they will put it in your uterus exactly where it belongs and that will bring an end to your misery.