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Original poster

Millionaire leaves her children 90p! They are challenging the will.

23 replies

JustMyTwoPenceWorth · 27/04/2010 08:03

which really raises the question - do children have the right to expect or demand to be left their parents' money?

How many people just assume that what their parents have will be theirs one day? Feel entitled to it! Hell, some even get angry if they feel their parents are spending too much of "their inheritance"

Well, it's not their inheritance, it's their parents money and surely they can do whatever the hell they like with it?

If that's give it to their children, great.If it's leave it to battersea dogs home, fair enough. If that's put it in a capsule and fly it to the moon - it's their money and their choice!

OP posts:

Original poster

JustMyTwoPenceWorth · 27/04/2010 08:04

whoopsie. link here

OP posts:

Sakura · 27/04/2010 08:08

Totally agree with you. It's up to her who she leaves her money to.

Sakura · 27/04/2010 08:11

Just skimmed it. She did sound a bit mad though. Still, mad people have rights too and it was still up to her where the money would go, even in her madness.
Or...what if it's all true...how can we ever know?

Northernlurker · 27/04/2010 08:16

She made that will 28 years before her death. Somehow I think they'll struggle to prove she was as mad as toast then and for every moment of the next 28 years so that she couldn't redo the will in their favour. Somebody thinking you are a nasty piece of work isn't in fact a delusion - it's their opinion.

BigBadMummy · 27/04/2010 08:16

It is her money and as such she can do what she likes with it.

Clearly there are issues in that she refers to it as "blood money for Judas".

I don't think there should be any "entitlement" to inherit at all.

And how much of this "inheritance" is now going to get swallowed up in lawyers fees? Same thing is happening with the Araldite family, their legal bill is running at £300,000+ now.

geordieminx · 27/04/2010 08:20

To be fair she does sound as mad as a box of frogs.

Doesnt sound like the daughters are exactly on the bread line either does it?

Sakura · 27/04/2010 08:26

Didn't notice that she wrote it 28 years ago! Haha, for 28 years she knew she was going to leave 90p to her daughters. Well, they shouldn't have had their eye on the inheritence then, should they.

TrillianAstra · 27/04/2010 08:27

No-one is entitled to inherit anything. Whicactually goes into a more serious discussion about people selling their houses to pay for care homes.

She's clearly a weirdo. They're probably regretting all the time they spent sucking up to her despite the weirdness, on the basis that they'd eventually get "paid" for it.

BouncingTurtle · 27/04/2010 08:32

My PILs are very comfortably off (and have been very generous to us and BIL and his family).
We keep urging them to spend the money now while they can enjoy it - both are disabled but are reasonably active, but have had a few setbacks that have laid them up, so both DH and I will worry that the time will come that they won't be able to get around as much as they do now
I know DH and his DB don't give a stuff if PILS left them anything, FIL worked very hard to ensure he was going to be comfortably off (plus he is a very good investor), and he is entitled to do with the money whatever he wants.
Children shouldn't expect anything in a will. However when we are right to be disgruntled is when one child is remembered but others are not, and then is no reason apart from favouritism
My mum was favoured in my nan's will, however her brothers and sister were not bothered as they appreciated mum is not as well off as them, and she looked after my nan in the last few years for her death (and frankly put up with a lot of crap from her!).

nighbynight · 27/04/2010 08:46

It is a tricky question.
I think in this case she is morally entitled, as she seems to have believed for a long time, that they had done something bad.
But generally, I think there is a moral obligation to ones family, and nobody is an individual, entitled to do entirely what they want with their money. For example, they may have inherited it from their own parents. Or they may have spent time earning it, which they did not spend with their children. Or they may have saved their money, instead of using it for things for their chidlren when they were small, so the children missed out on things they would otherwise have had.

Nobody is an island complete in themselves when they have children.
I think I will leave my own possessions equally divided between my children, unless one of them were to do something really terrible!

diddl · 27/04/2010 08:53

TBH, in most circumstances, why wouldn´t you leave your money to your children?

I think it´s when a care home is needed & children think that their inheritance is being spent

Sakura · 27/04/2010 08:54

Bouncingturtle, not sure I agree with what you say about favouritism. It's still their money to do with as they like. They might be bitter and twisted but they don't have to leave their money to anyone. In my experience, the favourite one in families ususally sells their soul to these type of devils and have worked for every penny they receive in the will.
OTOH I have heard many a tale where the carer is the one who gets nothing while the "favourite" inherits the lot. Moral: don't expect to get any inheritence.

sarah293 · 27/04/2010 09:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

zazen · 27/04/2010 22:49

I think it's a shame that your own family would be upset after your death by a decision such as this - I don't imagine her children thinking fondly of her.

Who would be happy and RIP knowing that they would be hated and cursed after they have died, and that their decision over a little matter such as 2plus million could cause such upset? By a small matter I mean it's not much use to her now is it? Neither are her jewels.

I think parents have a duty towards their children - a lot of love can be lost over a bad will, or no will at all, so it's best to be compassionate about your belongings and who gets what after you die.

I'd prefer my legacy to be one filled with love, not lawyers and arguments.

Having said that she does seem to be of an opinion that her children were murderers, and that the Men's Home Charity was a more deserving recipient of her money..

Hopefully they'll sort it all out between them and the lawyers won't take such a huge chunk out of it.

I think she could have left her children a couple of grand each, enough that they couldn't dispute it - and then the Men's home the remainder - she must have know that her children would dispute this - and I wonder why she had so little respect for the Men's Home Charity that she was so happy to put them through the lawyer's shake down also, just to make a point to her children that she didn't think they were good enough.

It's sort of vindictive and lacking respect for everyone really.

May she rest in peace however, however batty she was.

fruitshootsandheaves · 27/04/2010 22:57

My dads savings are now being spent on his care home. I have power of attorney but I still feel really guilty when I use his money for his bills! It just feels wierd to write a cheque out etc for someone elses money.
It would be nice to get some inheritance but much nicer to know that his last years were spent safe, warm, fed and cared for.

Original poster

JustMyTwoPenceWorth · 28/04/2010 07:12

I would say though zazen, if loving you after you're dead depends on whether you left them your money - they never really loved you at all.

OP posts:

expatinscotland · 28/04/2010 08:02

My folks are enjoying their hard-earned money and have made provision for care should they need it. They've even purchased and planned their funerals.

We're so grateful to them, my sister and I. I hope they can have the best of care if they should so need it. Their money is for them to enjoy and take care of their needs.

I'm going to inherit some cool vintage things and a collection of rosaries.

Other than those who are too ill to work and their carers, no one is entitled to money he/she did nothing to earn.

minipie · 28/04/2010 12:01

Completely agree expat. I've had so much from my parents already while they brought me up. I fully expect them to spend all their money on themselves - care if they need it, holidays and fine wine if they don't! Or they can leave it to charity, or whatever.

I must admit, however, that I would be a bit upset if they didn't treat my sis and I equally on inheritance. Not because I think I have any "right" to their money, but because it would suggest they felt differently about us.

In general, when talking about wills, I think we have to distinguish between the money itself, and the signals that people feel the will has sent to them. Much of the time I think people are more concerned about the signals than the money itself.

expatinscotland · 28/04/2010 12:06

I hear ya, mini.

Bit different for me and sis, though, as I chose to make my life 5000 miles away from my parents.

She is closer by and will probably be more involved in their care.

As such, I've told my folks already that, if there are any valuable assets left upon both their deaths (when one spouse dies, the other is going to get everything, quite rightly, they've been married for 46 years), I'd prefer they go to my sister.

zazen · 28/04/2010 12:24

I agree mini - and that is the point I was trying to make tuppence. That the will should be compassionate to your children, but that you can leave whatever to whomever.

One of my aunties didn't update her will for years and her main beneficiary predeceased her - executor cousin was just so FED UP of having to arrange everything's disposal. It took him two years to sort out everything, and I don't know if he was thinking so fondly of her throughout that time.

A good will is a lovely thing. Treating your children differently in a will can potentially be asking for trouble, unless there is good communication between all parties, and one/more child is acknowledged as more active in looking after the elderly parent.

ninedragons · 28/04/2010 12:32

Nightbynight raises a good point. Fair enough to give everything away to some loony charity if you made every penny yourself, but if you inherited money from the generations before you, I don't think you have the right to decide that the party stops with you.

fruitshootsandheaves · 28/04/2010 12:34

The only thing I have asked for is the cuckoo clock! But it will drive us all mad if it even works and I've nowhere to put it.
I do however have to decide what to do with the entire contents of dad's house over the summer. He never threw anything away and has all our old school books and bags, even broken stuff. I think I will have to go for house clearance. Anyone need an old TV or bed?

elliemental · 28/04/2010 12:39

my Birth Father is worth a couple of million. I have had nothing but sorrow from him in life, I want nothing from him in death.
I am skint now, I'm used to it and i don't want ever to have to feel 'grateful' to him.

From my mum, well she spent years by herself in abject poverty with 2 young children from her first husband, years of emotional abuse and financial control from my father; I hope to god she spends every last penny on a nice life on this earth, if she wants to!
I only want to be left something to remember her by. I leave it to my brother and sister to fight over her gold teeth...

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