My Daughter (aged five) was being abused by three boys, one held an arm each while the other punched her in the stomach, of course she didn't tell me, only the teacher, when the teacher did nothing she shut down and wouldn't speak to anyone her behaviour at school was to withdraw, I was constantly called in because of her 'bad' (withdrawing) behaviour.
It was a battle everyday to get her to school, on two occasions she was absent 'without permission' ( my permission didn't count), and I was threatened with the education welfare officer and social services !
When she finally told me what was happening I challenged the school, it was 'looked into' the boys were told off and that was the 'end of it', because my daughter was still withdrawn I was told her 'bad behaviour' sitting in class quietly not speaking or participating was unacceptable and she was excluded for a day and a half.
Needless to say I told the headmistress what I thought of her (quite rationally, quietly with no swearing ) and pointed out that her 'leadership' was questionable, I also informed her my daughter was leaving and would be home educated, her response was to send social services after us, apparently she was 'very worried that I might be a danger to my daughter'.
Eighteen months on my daughter is now seven is still home educated, is happy as larry and is working at a level of a ten/ eleven year old, social services looked into us and cleared us, the home ed department have given us good reports but I still feel very guilty about what happened to my daughter even though I was kept in the dark.
Good luck to the dinner lady, in my book and any other parent/ child who has suffered bullying and abuse, she is the kind of person your child needs in school watching over and out for them not someone who puts there head down and allows children to suffer.