Five yr olds to get "SEX" education.......

[skay]

Have a look at this

So how would you feel if your 5yr old was in a class being taught SEX education?

Should I be worried about this?

At five that can be discussed at home. At 5 - if they have to be there at all - then stick to reading and learning numbers and just learing to be at school at all.

Why shoe-horn another thing in? We're always being told it's hard to fit in the stuff they're already expected to cover. Can't parents be trusted to cover anything anymore?

Red thank you so much for that

Thing is TsarChasm, some of the most vulnerable children simply will not receive this type of 'protective' education (if any) at home. If you think about it, the most deprived children are also more likely to become sexualised early through general uncensored existence and access to sexual material and experience and thus a more formal educational exposure to the subject of sex and sexual relations might go some way to contextualise such experiences.

I am seeing a pattern here.

Most of us think that the age of 5 is much too young.

If at the age of 5 they are just covering relationships, their bodies, health, these subjects are not so bad, but some of what they are taught at this stage will go over thier heads.

I remember being given sex education at school I was in year 4 of junior school, (that's year 6). We started off learning about animals reproducing and then eventually moved on to learn about the human body and briefly covered sex. It was so brief that even I don't remember it. So what's the point of teaching 5yr olds?

haven't read all the thread so sorry if repeating...

It strikes me that once again the failings of parents in that Alphie's parents falied to supervise his activities (sorry, not unreasonable to want to know where your 13 year is. Apparently the girl even stayed over at his house in his room) mean the child ulimately suffers. Alphie is a father way to early and as a consequence of those parents failings our children will now be taught things we actually don't want them to know. We should I not be trusted to teach my child just becasue those parents didn't?

My ds 1 is 5 and I am happy at the pace we are going in terms of sex education. He knows the differences between girls and boys and we have used the proper names with him. I am currently 23 weeks prgt with ds 3 and ds 1 asks about the baby especially when I told him this would be his last baby brother or sister. He asked about how is brother got into my tummy and we said that daddy gave mummy a seed and it grew. When he asks (and he will!) how daddy gave me the seed we'll take it the next step etc ect. We are following his need to know and his curiosity. I wouldn't be happy for him to be told car blanche -here's the facts, there you go! We talk to him in a safe environment where he trusts us and I view it as my job (+dh) to tell him these things.

I do think by focussing on the mechanics of sex the government is being incredibly naive in thinking this will lower teenaged pregnancies, sex ed has to go hand in hand with education in morals, respecting yourself and others, peer pressure, self esteem and self confidence to make informed choices that are right for you.

By SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore on Tue 10-Mar-09 14:53:38

From what I can gather the new 'sex ed' isn't jut about sex, it's about families, respect, healthy and hygeine as well as sex and the biology bit.

The younger ones are going to be learning about different famiy units i.e step parents and siblings, single parents, adoptive parents etc and the importance of keeping 'those bits' clean and fresh and respecting other peoples personal boundrys.

The actual sex part comes in much later. They are not going to sit your five year ol down and tell them how to make the opposite sex climax. It's all going to be v age appropriate.
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The new sex ed being about families and learning about different family units...

Ds 1 watched Tracey Beaker the other day and became quiet and withdrawn as her mother came in and out of her life. I explained that not all families live together and not all mummies look after their children properly. He was shocked and I wouldn't have wanted him to hear that from anyone else. I have no contact with my mother and knew this would be mentioned one day and explained that my mother was like this but I am not and I would never leave him. He was very quiet as it is actually a huge thing for a 5 year old to take on board. I also have to try to tell him of a surprise cousin that we have only just found out about and are planning to meet!

We have friends (don't most people??) who have different set ups, step families, one parent families, why should schools feel the need to teach this?? Aren't we also absolving parents of yet more responsibilities?

This thread is full of misinformation.

The government are proposing to introduce a dutch style system, where at five kids are taught about relationships.

They will be taught mechanics at 8.

times article on the details here the british allow their children to be so grown uup on some levels (watching some films, tv programmes including some of the soaplines) and yet so many people freeze when they talk to their kids about sex.

What worries me is how Sex education is the responsibility of parents and school.

Some parents are pathetically bad about giving teaching their children about sex.

They leave it all up to the school and expect their child to understand all the mechanics as well as all the complex emotional and safety issues that surround sex in a few short lessons.

I think it is very really important that as they ask questions they receive accurate information. Not too much information at once as it won't sink in.

I want my boys to know how great sex is and how it should be shared with someone special to make it even better.

The amount of skewed information they get from the media if not counterbalanced from a young age is going to mean they have a messed up view of what a healthy sex live is.

I grew up in Scandinavia where sex education has a very long tradition and teenage pregnancies were very rare.

I do not think my children should be deprived of sex education at school simply because I can tell them about that at home. I can also tell them about the times table and the Fire of London. If there's any point in attending school at all for children with reasonably well educated, communicative parents, then it lies precisely in that the school and home complement and support each other. In this as in any other subject.

There is a lot of misinformation on this thread (absolutely not the case that children will be taught about different positions, not at 5 or even at 15) but others have stated this well so I won't add to it. But I will say to those that are concerned, you will have the right (as now) to take your children out of any lessons you're not comfortable with. Schools must also approve sex education policies with the governors before implementing anything, and that includes parent governors.

fine by me as long as the information is correct and age-appropriate.

But then, my mother had me drawing diagrams of the female reproductive system before I even went to school. (She'd just finished a zoology degree before having us and liked passing on her knowledge.) Our childminder was a tad taken aback when I told her: "Linda, I've forgotten how to draw a vagina." But cleverly answered: "Ooh, I can't remember either, let's ask Mummy when she gets home."

Cory - agree completely

I see no reason why there needs to be an artificial school/home divide. DD (7) knows about body parts, sex (both that it is used to make babies as well as being for fun), contraception, the importance of respecting one's body and not allowing strangers to touch it etc. She is also aware of masturbation, that it feels 'nice' to play with certain areas of the body but that this is a private thing.

Lots of children, however, will be completely clueless about the above and their parents will wriggle out of any responsibility to teach their children basic sex education. Therefore, the school steps in.

I have no problem with DD learning such things at home or at school. I was a teenage mother and I'm determined that DD will not have the same warped attitude to sex that I had as a teenager. I don't want sex to be a taboo subject and I want all lines of communication kept open. I'm glad that the government and I see eye to eye on this issue (makes a change!).

My step sister was never told the facts of life by her mother(she hated the idea of having a daughter old enough to make her look old)Somehow she managed to remain naive about it all. When she had her first period she thought she was dying and it really really scared her.

Had her school provided rudimentary and age appropriate sex education then she could have been prevented that extreme distress.

I would rather my children hear about it properly than some of the nonsence their friends tell them. I have honestly taught children who think you can't get pregnant the first time you have sex, that you can't get pregnant if you do it standing up, that condoms don't work because they have holes in them, that HIV is curable.

Just what is so wrong about a five year old learning about sex if it is age approprate?

A friend of mine was sexually abused because she honestly didn't know what she was promising her older relative. A better vocabulary might have helped.

If it'srelationships at 5 and mechanics at 8 it seems sensible.Some of ds's yr4 girlfriends are very well developed for their age and having periods, at that ge it is important to know what is going on.

Some of the most important parts of sex ed are easily tauht at 5 (and very beneficial too)- things like listening skills, communication, having the self belief to say no if something feels wrong.

All things I hope I have imparted to my kids.

Sayingt hat, the two who could understand knew something of the physical rudiments too, far better to drip feed bits as it comes up than to do it in one hurried and embarassed mishmash that misses most of the important bits anyhow (or not at all which was MIL's approach apparently)

(first time dh heard of a condom ws after his Mum complained at dinner that ribbed oes didnt do mucxh- poor 13 year old !)

DS (4.6) asked about babies the other night. He said he might want to have one when he got older, but only one. It was a really sweet chat. I said Mummy and Daddy got married and decided they would like a baby. daddy put a seed in Mummy's tummy. And you grew and popped out of Mummy's tummy. He said, "So I need to find a wife? Mummy do you think that A might be my wife?"

It is obviously important to answer these questions - but age appropriate is also important.

Cory how sad

When my DD was abused i was shocked to find myself being sobbed to and asked through tears.. "He kissed me so i am having a baby aren't i..my friend said if a boy kisses you you have a baby"

I resolved from that DAY that none of my kids would ever be kept in the dark about sex again, how terrifying that thought must have been..

I am of course sometimes upset that i should have to tell a child such things at an age where IMO they should be playing with dolls ect, and one does wonder whether talking about it opens their eyes to it too young, but if you are going to tell them, you may as well make it worth it and give them the whole story, how nice it can be ect, but also the dangers. STI's for example. Unwanted PG should be explained to boys as well as it is also their responsibility IMO to use contraception and not rely upon the female, even though it is the female who will end up carrying and giving birth to the baby.

I see it as my responsibility to give my children information to keep them safe and as i said in a previous post, this includes information about sex which is just another part of life.

I haven't felt talking to my children about sex has spoiled their childhood in any way. It is part of the whole weird and wonderful experience of getting to know the world they have found themselves in. But I did find the set topic of the sinking of the Titanic tmi for my 5yo. That is a good deal scarier than having sex. And far less essential to know about.

I had another thought, surely we want our children to grow up to have a sexually fullfilling adult lives.

If they don't know how to communicate or they are too emarrassed to say things like vagina or penis or even (gods forbid) think sex is dirty, then haven't we failed them in some way.

Now I'm not suggesting anything other than age appropriate learning when they start being curious. As you may have guessed this subject doesn't bother me but I know some parents have huge difficulties broaching it with their children so why shouldn't the school step in and fill the gaps with factually correct, age appropriate education?