OOh you SKIVING CUPCAKE BAKING SAHMS....read this

[HoorayHenry]

www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/columnists/janice_turner/article5484714.ece

i ADORE Caitlin.
I would have her babies if I wasnt so busy with Jack and protocols.

and madonnas dd SO needs to sort out her brows man.

And Janice is a sex goddess in real life
So gorgeous.

This article is horrible and patronising to all mothers.

I am a full time WOHM but I can bake cupcakes and look at internet shopping sites and go to coffee shops if I like and so can anyone else, it's a free country. I bet Ms French Politician does these things too from time to time.

Describing SAHMs as "idle"and "listless" with a "life [without] purpose" until school pick-up time is beyond rude. That certainly doesn't describe any SAHM I know.

arr, I reckon she's just jealous!

I bet she doesn't have children. And neither do her friends. She's just making assumptions about what being a SAHM is like.

pasturesnew and others: it doesnt describe any SAHM that I knew in the UK. However, it does describe plenty in germany.

Gymnasium (grammar school) -> University -> Job (2 years) -> Marriage -> Yummy Mummydom, and a life spent making handmade invitations for the precious child's birthday, running the kindergarten, organising elaborate receptions for the teacher complete with said child playing the oboe, coaching said child for gymnasium.....and so on.
My neighbour has a regular slot with her friends where she goes out nordic walking on weekday mornings. Others spend the whole morning in cafes.

They are to the average UK mum.

Apply Janice Turner's article to Bavaria, and its plenty relevant.

Lucky Bavarians.

Am gobsmacked by this article. Why is it considered some kind of incredible achievement and admirable strength to return to work five days after a C-section? After mine I was battered, bruised and could hardly stand up. Does JT think this demonstrates weakness? Rachida Dati must be either oblivious to pain or have some kind of warped stoical mentality in my view.

As for 'she'll have the baby for the rest of her life, this opportunity only comes around once' - well only RD will know the regrets she might have later on at not seeing her daughter grow up.

I dunno, missm, in one way I would love this life. But in another way, I feel quite sorry for them.

They really do put huge amounts of effort and worry into total trivia.

And they are so up their own arses with their perfect families, that they can have a very ignorant outlook on the rest of the world.

LOL that Washersaurus' main issue with the article was cupcakes vs. fairy cakes - it's a one woman crusade but one I fear you are likely to lose to the invasion of the nasty agressive American cupcake which is killing off our native fairy cakes.

I do baking - on my one day off/weekend - but not necessarily with my DC

Yes, when I read this one at the weekend I wasn't happy. I haven't read all the thread so apologies of someone has already raised this but I did think Janice Turner got one point bang on.

There is a a lot of truth in her assertion that being a SAHM has been "packaged" and sold to women - and that the truth is very different from the Cath Kidston/bunting/cupcake baking dream. You see it everywhere - from the f**king Boden catalogue to adverts for Vanish. A lot of my friends (strangely, those who are yet to have kids) have fallen for it because they can't understand why I want to WOH because my DH earns enough for me not to (be it with some fairly significant lifestyle changes).

Janice Turner was harsh in a lot what she said but the repackaging and reselling of domesticity to women has been quite gobsmacking.

no nannies and cleaners that I know (though plenty of Au Pairs for SAHMs). The average family size is 1,7 children I think.

nordic walking has now joined quilting on my mental dart board

no they have gorgeous houses. Huge by UK standards.

the messiest house around is mine, I fear.

I sink into despair when I visit their houses.

Riven you forgot the bit about calling your manicurist to gell your nails (see other thread). I'd like to dispute your claim to the filthiest kitchen though - mine is a hovel despite sweeping the bloody floor 18 times a day.

NN how do you hold your head up? Or can you just give the excuse that you're British?

the journalist was writing about UK mums

Shame on her

My journo friends who know sahms would have more respect

fiction

pure fiction

Love it! Frogspawn one week, this the next - and all because I got a free Times with our Ocado order.

What utter, utter tripe.

Does anyone else think that Rachida Dati may have had the baby deliberately early, or is that just me being very, very uncharitable? [catty emoticon]

Actually, I don't have too much of a problem with what she's done - fair play, her choice, not mine - but the article - bah.

I'm a journo and a mum. I have more respect.
I personally think Rachida Dati was mad to go back to work so soon, and sad if she felt she had to to avoid being sidelined. Most men can take paternity leave safe in the knowledge that their job will still be there when they get back. The least you can expect after major surgery is a few weeks' recovery time.

nighbynight, that is Bavaria though, not Germany as a whole? I had a German aupair who fills me in. Are you liking it there?

read the german schools thread blueshoes....

it is true that bavaria is rich and very traditional. People still tell you (sometimes) that they don't hold it against you that you are divorced.

I adore Janice.

Off on a tangent but I can see absolutely no problem with some German mums choosing to live their life like that. I don't realise that it was a pre-requisite of being a 'worthy' SAHM that you had to have it really hard.....

well stepford, I have a problem with it. They are here in large enough numbers to make my life difficult. They raise the average to ridiculous heights - which means that the rest of us are judged by their standards, and found wanting. Ever sent your child out in an unironed shirt? Phone the social services!
They know bog all about being a single parent, or a working mum, or being poor, but that doesn't stop them from being hugely judgemental and blaming of everyone who doesn't measure up, and giving their ignorant opinions at every opportunity.

They also perpetuate a grossly unfair school system that is heavily optimised towards small families and SAHMs (you have to coach your child in the afternoons, cos there is NO AFTERNOON SCHOOL and no school dinners, and your child comes home from school not understanding what the teacher said). They raise the bar ridiculously high, by the amount of time that they have got to put in to carry their child through the 4th class into the grammar school. They know the school work better than the child does, they are down at the school every 5 minutes for meetings with the teacher (so she expects that every parent who cares will do likewise).
( In the uk, if you aren't coached for the 11+, you can take A levels from the comprehensive. In Bavaria, hauptschule kids arent allowed to take the equivalent of A levels - they all know they are just going to be "cleaners and caretakers".)

And they are always sending out irritating little notes which say things like
"It is Frau Teachers birthday next week. To mark the occasion, we have arranged a reception on xxxxx at xxxxx time(bang in the middle of the working day, naturally!!!). We intend to present Frau Teacher with a chest, hand made by Johannes's father, containing a small present from each member of the class. Please can your child give their hand made present to Elizabeth by Tuesday.
At the reception, we will sing a song. We are gathering at ....... for a song rehearsal on Monday at ....... We are looking for children (and parents!) to accompany us, so please let me know if your child plays an instrument (guitar, flute, recorder...) to Level 3.
Please let me know if you cannot attend the rehearsal."
NO I BLOODY CANT ATTEND, I HAVE A LIVING TO EARN!