It was a publicized party. If they didn't want the press there, why make it public? It had nothing to do with the fact that they were gay. The whole point was to celebrate the coming out of a prominent gay. You can hardly come out if no one knows about it. In other words, it was a party to celebrate the attention of the media and as a result it would be a bit disingenuous to expect the media not to show up.
Of course, I'm sure that many of us have made comments that turned out to be offensive to someone. But most people, when made aware of the fact that they have offended someone, then apologize, or at a minimum, stop saying what it is that is considered offensive. Ken was not able to even do the bare minimum which most people would expect of their 2 year olds - that is, apologize for something that you are told is wrong, even if you don't quite get why it's wrong.