If you think Julia Hollander was , ahem, ^interesting^ what do you think of this story?

[Twiglett]

www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/femail/article.html?in_article_id=554769&in_page_id=1879

"Snuggling Alex under her Disney duvet in our four-bedroom semi in the Midlands that night, we vowed we'd love her for ever".

That poor, poor little girl.

She sounded like a fairly normal child TBH. It seems like they had an idea of what being parents would be like (don't we all pre-baby days) and were not prepared to give up on their dream. Unfortunately they were prepared to give up on their daughter.

ALL children are guilty of attention seeking and pushing the boundaries - it goes with the territory.

Yes, I thought the Devil headline was vile. The adoptive mother did seem to get exasperated awfully quickly with the learning difficulties the girl had (e.g. difficulty with her using the remote control).

Expat I feckin lurve your dry wit girl!

Agree with others - what an unedifying story, typical DM treatment too .
And that photo....ugh.
"Alex" seems to have been let down by every adult she has been involved with since birth. Not sure how this makes her a Devil Child.

So if their "blood son" had exhibited this type of behaviour would they have dumped him in a home and visited him 4x a year - I doubt it. Shocking.

Someone I know has adoped a toddler who has turned out to be quite a distubbed child, with severe autism and she hasn't abandoned him even though the toll on her and her dh sounds exhausting.

What a silly, silly woman. She needed a puppy, not a child.

I wish I hadn't read this actually.
I can't believe the course of events leading up to this being published. that they would write a book about it. that it would be published. that the Daily Hate would print an extract. the terrible self pity of the woman.
I am actually feeling quite despairing about it.

I have spent an entire week reading the DM. It does things to your soul...bad things.

I have had professional dealings with an individual who adopted more than 1 and less than 5 children,all with complex needs.

All bar one are now in foster care as person has gone abroad with new partner.

harpsi - I totally agree. As I was reading it I kept scanning back up to the top to see if I'd missed reference to it being fiction / a sick joke.

moondog .

I know

dh brought MIL's copy of the DM home from work today as it is Femail day

I say this headline and scanned and lobbed it

v sad

There was a thread on here recently though about a child with RAD. I don't claim to know anything about it but (from what people on that thread said) it's more than normal 'challenging' behaviour - its origins are from the child's negelect as a baby. The child, because of that neglect, has never formed the ability to relate to other people - they are incapable of forming proper relationships, of loving, if you like. It's very complex. And dreadfully sad.

I don't underestimate how awful RAD is to deal with at all.
but to describe the poor damaged 5 year old child as "little miss evil" an "ruthless an manipulative".....

Poor little girl. What will her life turn out like, do you think?

Lots of self-justification from author. Ridiculous photo. "Posed by model" - as if it might ever have been a real picture of the little girl.

I have an adopted daughter and would no more write a book about her and allow the DM to feature it than I would fly to the moon.

You don't 'rescue' children, you don't look for them to 'make your family complete'. Sheesh - sentimental codswallop. SS should have seen this couple coming.

A five year old with a history like this child's is OBVIOUSLY going to have severe attachment and behavioural problems. Disney
duvet covers and a vow to 'love this child forever' were never going to suffice.

No one comes out of this well.

makes me want to go in and cuddle my nearly 5-year-old girl.

another "oh woe poor me" book to add to the already overstocked shelves.
I personally think there should be some law to stop these money grabbers using children they have abandoned for what ever reason to make money.

No, I know, harpsi - that's the DM for you - it's a hideous rag.

What a revolting article. The DM is awful.
If she were their natural daughter would they have given her up?
So sad, and now they are making money out of it too. Disgraceful

Adopting a child who has come from a bad home situation (ie older than a baby and has spent some aware time in a bad situation) may well bring problems. Kids who are adopted because they were being (for instance) sexually abused in their biological home may display sexually inappropriate behaviour towards their new siblings, kids who have come from a chaotically violent home may be more than usually violent. But not much in that article described anything that wasn;t fairly normal child behaviour: the child didn't torture pets, start fires, steal or attempt to kill siblings.
But how much of the real sotry is acutally available in this article is probably another matter [grr]

very all round.

But, while I don't condone her writing a book, at least it appears she tried to seak help for her daughter, help which seemingly was not forthcoming. As opposed to Julia Hollander who abandoned her's as soon as she realized there was a problem.

And I do think that a lot of people romanticize (sp?) adoption. I've read threads on the adoption section by people saying that they would like to adopt to give a disadvantaged child a better chance (essentially the same as "rescuing" abandoned children isn't it?), have heard comments from several people in rl who, when talking about maybe not being able to have children (this pre ttc) say, "well if I can't have a baby naturally, I can always adopt,", as if it really is that easy.