front page news in MY local paper

[fryalot]

Some bloke came third in a competition

An orchestra will play in a fortnight's time

A village had a christmas fair

sounds fab - i'll swap you east london any day!

there was a story a couple of years ago - the chap from the post office forgot that he had left his moped in the garage and walked to the pub - when his moped wasn't in front of his house the next day he reported it stolen. This was, of course, front page news. When it was found in his garage all along, the next week's paper had no choice but to have front page news:

"lost bike found"

I kid you not

My local rag once had a story about a milk bottle being stolen from the doorstep

Happily we are currently embroiled in a Mayoral porn internet scandall (the hacks must be wetting themselves with excitment!)

Sadly, the front page of mine says 'Pervert spared jail for a second time'

Another thread, another time I think...

In our local paper we had the whole of page 3 taken up by a story headlined 'Donkey Visits Old People's Home'

Was a bit of a highlight, I thought.