So, who feels isolated? Did anyone here take part in this survey?

[CaraLondon]

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/10/18/nbabies118.xml

Particularly liked: "Mumsnet, the most popular and the most famous [networking website], has 60,000 members and gets 250,000 hits a month."

I didn't take the survey, and yes I felt incredibly isolated and still do.

Strike 1- I had a baby in my 20's so none of my friends are even thinking about having babies, which was very isolating.

Strike 2- My parents suck and we absolutely no help, my lovely MIL was on another continent, which was very isolating.

Strike 3- I'm not at all mainstream so finding likeminded people through NCT and playgroups has been moving at a glacial pace. Which has been very isolating.

Yep, certainly one of the loneliest times in my life and I consider myself to be pretty self sufficient.

Traumatic birth & related medical probs, new town, no close family (mum deceased) & loneliness led to pnd - something I didn't know I had had until pg with no 2.

I was so lonely I used to go to Tesco daily just so I'd see ppl! I made an initial attempt to join a local mums' group but it was totally intimidating and cliquey. It wasn't until I started taking my lo to Tumbletots and returning to work after 9m did my pnd end and I stopped being lonely.

I do feel guilty about wishing away that precious time with my ds now.

I am relieved to be coming to the end of this stage. DS is nearly 1 and I have become a different person since going back to work just 2 days a week. Help is virtually non-existent and I did go round the shops ALL the time just to see adults. Mother and baby groups aren't the places to make deep and meaningful friendships.

I discovered today that in the late 70's early 80's my friends mum was given a carer for a few hours a week simply because she had 4 kids under 4. You get bugger all help these days .

It seems to me that the survey was commissioned to state the bleeding obvious, so I was interested in other mum's responses. I am a first time mum (my dd is 12 weeks on Saturday) and the opening paragraph that states that new mothers only spend 90 minutes a day in the company of other adults apart from their partners made me laugh outright - I think in the last three months, I have only spent 90 minutes in total with other adults apart from dh. I guess it is the culture we live in, whereby people don't want to help out with the pressures of a newborn.

Only one other friend in my age group has a baby and survives through NCT groups, but like dizietsma and Heated, I can't do that - it seems to be a really intimidating environment. I don't think PND is even the issue - without PND, you can feel really isolated and with it, it just feels like there is no end. I know that as my friends start having babies, it may change, but then I'll feel sceptical about their motives - which makes me feel terrible!

But I knew, throughout my pregnancy, that it was going to change for good and that I would have to put my social life on hold, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

I could relate to the results of that survey.

I remember those early days all too well. It was to me like walking through a dark valley. The first year was very isolating and lonely, a massive change to life before when I actually felt like a participant rather than a spectator to the outside world.

I also used to go to the shops primarily to see other people: I needed that social contact. Found M & T groups to be unwelcoming to any newcomers so stopped going. Parents were (and still are) unsupportive. Neighbours were non existant - they are all at work.

What helped at the time - a book called "Life after Birth" written by Kate Figes. Internet was still in its early days.

It only started to get a bit "easier" when DS started preschool.