Single parenet benefits proposed to end when youngest child is 11 rahter than 16

[uwila]

Oh this will be popular round here.

here

Uwila, I said god forbid.

And frankly, until you've been a lone parent you haven't got the faintest idea what it's like to have absolutely no time to yourself with no adult back up at all. People who tell me that because their DH works a lot they know exactly how it feels to be a lone parent, make me larf. (I know that's not what you're saying btw.)

And another thing - a rep from One Parent Families was on the radio this morning talking about this. The government's target is to get 70% of lone mothers into the cash economy. Of lone mothers with children over the age of 11, 66% are already in paid work. So is it really worth persecuting the rest of them, for the sake of that 4%?

Bozza - I'm delighted to hear that!

I imagine it's mentally much more exhausting though. (Am not looking forward to it)

Sorry for awful grammar in that last post. I am currently working my first of the three days and am full of cold and slept rubbish, but my full time colleague has been off sick since last week so I have a backlog of work on and shouldn't really be on Mumsnet.

Am I the only one who is SO sick of a government run on f&&ing targets*?

How idiotic is that?

Which bit are you delighted about caligula? Me working since the kids were babies, me staying part time when DD hits 4 1/2, teenagers being less phsycially exhausting, or me agreeing with a lot of what you say?

Slightly confused cold-brain here.

Agree about the mental challenges of a teenager. Although, of course, a 2yo who shouts at you for not getting the yellow cup out when there isn't one in the cupboard, and she actually means the purple one can also be slightly mindnumbing at times.

LOL, at the fact that they're not as physically exhausting.

I bet they are if they start beating you up.

Always look on the bright side of life...

No doubt this will be a perfect excuse for all those absent fathers, who begrudge having to support their childen, to stop paying maintenance as well.

I don't receive income support as my maintenance is a few pounds too much, but there is absolutely no way I can afford to go out and get a job at the moment. Unless I could find a job in a school environment, which would probably work ok, until one of the kids was sick. I cannot afford childcare for 4 children, I couldn't get a job that would pay anywhere near enough money.

We've been asked to go on Simon Mayo's show on Radio 5 this afternoon to discuss this - so please keep your thoughts and personal experiences coming - thanks!

MNHQ

Sorry Carrie, I think I killed it!

This government by target business has caused no end to trouble. Is Labour really that unimaginative?

Don't be fooled, Gordon will tax you to hell with one hand and pretend to give it back to you with the other.

Lower the personal tax threshhold.

Provide low cost, quality assessible childcare. And not only during hte days, since many professions require evening, night and weekend work.

DO something for REAL about the high cost of housing in this country.

Get rid of this idea that only full-time employment is acceptable.

Then maybe, maybe you have a chance of seeing more lone parents being able to return to work.

Agree Expat.

The biggest issue for me is probably flexibility. Good quality childcare is all very well, but actually when my kids only have me, they need me more than if they had me and another parent imo. When they're older, it's also about being able to work from home, do flexible hourse, etc., without being made to feel like a pariah.

Every time I think of applying for a full time job or a job outside the home, one of my kids gets sick. If I were superstitious, I'd think someone up there was trying to tell me something. But that awful thing of having to ring in and tell your employer that you have to stay home, when in fact in most jobs, you shouldn't need to do that - you should be able to shift days around, or work from home, and no-one bat an eyelid.

More rights to flexibility and a proper work life balance would benefit all employees, but lone parents would disproportionately benefit. I don't see the government making any moves to encourage employers to make flexible working a reality, in the shape of tax incentives for companies who do.

I agree with uwila. I'm not a lone parent, but dh and I both work and it makes me really angry that some of the tax I pay is used so that other people can be sahm's.

My dh works shifts, I currently work full time but am due to start working some of my hours from home. We have to co-ordinate childcare, so why shouldn't lone parents. People on this thread seem to think it isn't possible to find work that is flexible, however the company I work for have agreed to me doing some of my work from home, and I was also able to do flexible hours at the last 2 jobs I had.

There is a girl in my dds class whose mum is a lone parent who doesn't work, when I sent invitations out to my dd's party she said to me "I wish I could afford to hire a hall for my dd's party, I'm going to have to do her party at home" well why doesn't she get a job then.

Thanks for the insight, kslatts

Kslatts, you are VERY lucky to be offered flexible work.

Please understand that this is NOT the case for the vast majority of working parents.

Good for you that you're able to work from home, do you realise that that's is not an option for probably 90% of working parents out there. They're told NO, their employer doesn't offer it or it is not compatible with their occupation. Take nursing or teaching for example. You can't do those from home.

Also, when there are two of you, it is easier than being a lone parent.

I don't know the full-story yet! Are they going to lower our benefits? Which i don't get much to be honest.

I am a single mum to Ryan, who will be 2 in March. I don't get any help from Ryan's father at all. I am with Ryan 24/7 and it's like a full-time job to me. Cooking and cleaning etc. Some days it is so hard! I used to work from the age of 16-24.

Like Ryan's father living off benefit (income support) and living in a council house with his gf. I don't get a penny off him. Which i am so ANNOYED about. I can't see my ex will ever getting a job. While i am stuggling at the moment.

I would like to go back as part-time job, when Ryan start full-time at school!!

Jeez, you poor old thing Kslatts, my heart bleeds for you. Let's hope your dh doesn't leave you, doesn't decided that you and the kids can't live in 'his' house anymore and you end up scrabbling around like the rest of us. There for the grace of god ....

This is about helping people to best help themselves, not 'I'm alright, Jack, so stuff you.'

I think they need to concentrate on helping get the women who want to go back to work, into work.

If you are out of the workplace for an extended period, it is incredibly daunting having to go for interviews again and getting asked what you've been doing with your life.

They need to help encourage these women and at the same time, incentivise or encourage employers to offer jobs that are flexible/job-share/part time.

I applied for flexible working. I was told "no". So I work 8 hours per day 5 days per week (actually I generally work more than that but that's what I'm paid for) just like everybody else. This doesn't make me hard done by. I'm just working for abliving to get by and pay my enormous taxes, childcare, and rent bills.

Don't see why other people think they are above this life where we all work for a living. Simply don't understand why some people think they have some civil right to stay home because they want to.

I keep typing things and deleting them, Kslatts attitude has pi$$sed me off so much, I don't think I can post on this thread again.

A lot of them don't, uwila, but they are low-skilled and any job they take isn't going to pay enough for them to afford childcare.

Even with tax credits, they're still not going to be able to afford to pay childcare costs.

Not to mention, they lose housing and council tax benefits, and we all know how expensive it is to live here.

In addition, many low-skilled - as well as many skilled professions - require flexiblity in hours. Weekends, evening, nights.

Again, traditional childcare isn't there for people working this type of shift work and earning buttons.

but uwila, you're 'lucky' enough to be able to afford a nanny. Most people who go back to work after an extended break aren't going to be earning that sort of dosh.

Big clap on the back for you then Uwila. If living your lifestyle makes you as lacking in empathy as you are, I'm glad I stay at home.

Agree with foxinsox. If the government wants parents to go back to work, then they should see that that goal is acievable. You know, someone on an average income should be able to pay for childcare, pay the rent, and have enough left over for food, clothes, etc.

But, today's housing prices and childcare costs are not affordable for the average person. So, people stay on bebfits.

Again, am happy to support effort to train people and subsidse childcare so that people can go back to work. Am not happy to pay people to stay home.

I understand that it is harder for some people than others to find work that is flexible, one thing I forgot to put on my post was that to be in a position to apply for flexible working I had to be with my employer for at least 6 months, so for the last 6 months I have worked full time.

Why should the tax I pay be used to keep other mums at home (mums who are as capable as me of working).