Oh now this has pissed me off

[Longtalljosie]

www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-health/10578227/Women-delaying-motherhood-is-worrying-issue-says-Britains-chief-doctor.html

Women are leaving it too late to have children apparently. And are choosing to do so.

Nothing to do with men then? Because obviously women do it all by themselves and are entirely in charge of when they reproduce, in the manner of an amoeba?

Every friend I have in the last chance saloon was ready for years and had a male partner saying "not now... you're over-reacting... next year... soon" and in one case after years of stringing along when she finally put her foot down at 36 announced he was off, actually, and never wanted children. She's now 40, still single and very unhappy.

Lots of DH's friends without children constantly go on about how their mid-late 30s partners, desperate for children have "loads of time". I really think society looks down the wrong end of the telescope on this... There is lots of debate about why women are electing to have children later and their partners aren't even touched on!

Well, obviously it's not all on women as to when they reproduce, their partners are involved, circumstances are involved, but it's a concern for women because we have a smaller reproductive window. Men can happily send their troops out well into their sixties and seventies.

I get where you're coming from but I think you're being a bit silly. Men don't have the same concerns are women about reproducing later. If the article said it was couples choosing to have children later that would be narrow-minded as well. I don't think your personal experiences are true for everyone. At least maybe articles like this may help the kind of people you're describing realize that there isn't always 'loads of time' with a woman's reproductive system.

They don't like teenage mums either but never mention teenage dads, of course no male of any age was ever involved in a teenage pregnancy

Its no different to single mums they of course are often accused of getting themselves pregnant to get benefits and a council house, again how do you get yourself pregnant?

Well unfortunately, unless they've invented a child making machine, men need to be as concerned as women. Because they're not making or deciding about these hypothetical babies on their own either.

When they are talking about specific, biological issues relating to child-bearing, then it's fine to specify the sex.

Age of the woman is a distinct issue in regards to fecundity.

That is not a taboo area to discuss, and there genuine sex-linked biological differences which doctors are a relevant community to be discussing it.

Gender roles in society, and how those impact on reproductive choices are a totally separate issue. Female fecundity is but one strand of that.

'Bad science' is however pretty much the default position of reporters, who lazily conflate issues or use a bit of 'scienciness' to advance an editorial line.

It's the style and poor standard of reporting that is the problem. Not doctors.

The media does love to talk about their 'concern' with educated people with a uterus who are ambitious enough to do things other than have kids, though apparently not educated enough to know about fertility reducing over an age.

It would obviously be more helpful to bring in their partners and wider society's impact on having children and how much of a choice or not that is.

I think it would also be quite helpful to have information on fertility decline. As others have said, we get mixed signals that we have to have kids now or our ovaries will burst on one hand and the 'you have plenty of time' in the other. A more realistic idea of roughly how many go through menopause or otherwise infertile before 20, 30, 40+ would be a better platform than the current situation.

Early menopause runs in my family, I'm perimenopausal and 28. Not everyone will know their family history and knowing the very early symptoms (headaches were my first, around my period) could save tears later if that was what this was really about (I doubt it from the paper's point of view). Many still conceive during the perimenopausal stage though.