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Donor egg, IVF, surrogate mother, "I'm the Daddy"

12 replies

JanH · 17/05/2006 15:24

\link{http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/4986804.stm\BBC website} - BBC1 prog tonight at 10.40.

The messages at the bottom of the page are completely split - no fence-sitters at all - fascinating. (Am on fence myself Grin)

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MrsEff · 18/05/2006 10:41

did anyone else watch this????

SenoraPostrophe · 18/05/2006 10:45

perhaps they edit out those boring fence sitting responses jan?

I'm there too: on the one hand hardly anyone bats an eyelid if a single woman has a baby with donor sperm. on the other hand, well, it's a bit odd. I see there's no mention of a nanny in the article.

MrsEff · 18/05/2006 10:54

i thought b4 watching it that it was fine... as no different in theory to me and my husband having our 3 boys...then me leaving him- to be 'the daddy'.....

however after watching it...now feel quite disturbed by the bloke himself...his behaviour seemed so odd.

honestly feel for any man who wants a baby...as women can 'just go out and get pregnant' and noone is the wiser...but men do not have this option!!! (obviously!)

I ended up just 'not liking the daddy'...and definitely feeling that the idea of what he did is fine by me...but he seemed a very complex man...

i also noted with interest how the biological mother felt little attatchment to the boys...however the surrogate mum was very tearful on meeting them.

I was also very annoyed that he 'chose' the egg donor to be 'pretty,fit etc'...and then the surrogate he chose for her 'womb' ...yes...i know it is obvious that he wanted a reliable pregnacy etc...but i just felt that on the footage they showed on tv...he seemed more interested in the egg donor...than the woman who actually carried the babies.

lucykate · 18/05/2006 11:00

thats a very interesting story, would have liked to have seen the programme.

i suppose men can actually get broody too, can't they.

Sherbert37 · 18/05/2006 11:03

I didn't like the way he talked to the children - almost creepy. All that emphasis on eggs and body parts at age 5 - really very strange.

MrsEff · 18/05/2006 11:05

yes creepy is exactly what i thought.... way to much detail for such young minds...and could't help wondering what the boys opinion of women would be in future???

JanH · 18/05/2006 12:17

I forgot it was on, darn it. Will have a look through prog listings and see if it's on again.

From reading the article though I wasn't at all surprised that the surrogate mother was much more affected than the donor. Carrying 3 babies for all that time, you would be more attached than to an egg!

OP posts:
JanH · 18/05/2006 12:24

It's not scheduled for the next week or so - \link{http://www.bbc.co.uk/whatson/\BBC What's On page} (very useful Smile)

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Blu · 18/05/2006 12:39

Missed the programme....I'm a fence sitter - with strong opposing views pulling me either side!

Interesting that one of the first comments by a man in the 'talk' bit underneath says men can now 'control and nurture' children. yes....control their creation...hmmmmmm. Dodgy.

Also, sad that if he was so desparate he could not have adopted. IF sngle men were eligible for adoption, he would have been checked by SS. The route he has chosen and been able to pay for is a sort of loophole, isn't it, that means that any man can effectively conjour up a child by themselves, for better , for worse. (Not saying he is 'worse', as I simply don't know).

JanH · 18/05/2006 12:42

He'd be too old to adopt, wouldn't he, Blu? As would the woman who's been in the news recently.

I don't know if that was ever a consideration here though - men in particular seem to want their own children.

OP posts:
PinkKerPlink · 18/05/2006 12:43

I think its lovely:)

Blu · 18/05/2006 12:55

I would have been to old to adopt, too, when I had DS (with no fertility assistance or intervention - except from DP!).

He's using the same process as the first gay couple (the perma-tanned guys who lived in Saffron Walden), isn't he?

If he's a great and loving Dad, I think it's lovely, too. I expect the boys will have some weird feelings about their absent 'mums' at some stage, but that needn't be the end of the world.

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