T.M.I. =Sex Education for under year 5 and 6 in Primary Schools

[Poeteats4gals]

Hi fellow passionate Mums!!!

Sex Education is not mandatory ...yet. Perhaps September. Parents have many legal rights in this area. They have a legal right to ask for The Sex Education Policy for the school and to scrutinise it and to ask to see DVD's and they have the right to withdraw their children to go swimming as I did today.

If your child is disturbed in any way by the Sex Ed. materials used in the school you can take your child for counselling and have same recorded by your G.P. and seek legal advice. Groups of parents can go to a solicitor especially if you were not informed. The law after all is there ,supposedly , to protect the innocent...our children whom we entrust to be educated.

Schools telling little kids about Sex Ed.is a bit like schools telling them about the tooth fairy or Santa without telling parents. It deskills us as parents and gives kids too much information , too young...what do you think?

The kids chat about things they don't need to know, simply because they are being taught. It's the Garden Of Eden ....all over again ...knowledge!

How about reading , writing , Maths and leaving Sex Ed to us?

WE so know the stage our kids are at!
Anyway ..has Sex Ed. worked to bring down STD's or teenage pregnancy rates?

Let's have some teaching on self esteem
and gift and talent awareness instead that g further in schools that an e mail and a course at a weekend when its down family time.

We know our kids best in this oversexualised culture and this is best to come from parents as and when it comes up..What do you think?

[TheRhubarb]

Oh do shut up Crapola, your arguments are making no sense now at all.

Boatto - thanks Pedant . I think drugs ed in Year 5 makes perfect sense. Does it cover smoking and alcohol? It is worrying how many children are drinking and smoking at such young ages. We are unfortunate enough to have a heroin addict live near us and I've had to explain to both of my children about drug taking because this man has spoken to both of them and has been seen coming in and out of the bushes. So I've just had to explain to them about taking care when playing in the fields and around the bushes and to look out for needles or anything that looks slightly suspicious.

I would love to see sex ed brought in gradually, as part of the curriculum, with emphasis on their body parts, the terms for them, relationships and so on. It doesn't necessarily have to cover sex as that is irrelevant at the age of 7. Most of them are just about getting their heads around the fact that babies do not come out of belly buttons! And safety really isn't spoken about enough. Our school teaches the children how to use the internet but it doesn't teach them about keeping themselves safe on the internet. I volunteered to lead a class in that and they let me. But it's the same argument as sex, why teach them how to do it if you are not going to teach them about safety?

[TobyLerone]

A heroin addict spoke to them?

I think you should have them drug tested stat.

[BoattoHogwartsviaBolivia]

Crapola, you really seem very angry at Rhubarb0 and I'm not sure why. She didn't suggest sex ed was connected to RE, just that they are two aspects of the curriculum that parents often have strong feelings about and can withdraw their children from.
From what I understand, she really is teaching her children about sex and it just ensuring that it is done at a level that she as a parent, who knows her children, is happy with. If everyone did this as well as she suggests she is, we wouldn't need to teach it in school. I would much rather parents did it, as it is so personal, but they don't.

[TheRhubarb]

Toby - he went out of his way to talk to them and they have been told not to speak to strangers so they were worried. He also, as my dd put it, made them feel "uncomfortable". Sorry I should have said more, didn't mean it to sound that flippant.

[BoattoHogwartsviaBolivia]

They do cover smoking and alcohol as well as monitoring that there are other things, without going into too much detail. The course is good, but it is taught by a visiting teacher from the local secondary school, who is very dull! We could do a much better job ourselves .

I am a pedant on that issue, because it can be an indicator on how a person perceives Gypsies ( which is a whole other thread!). I did a MA dissertation on Gypsies in Children's Literature, so I notice it!

Regarding sex ed being taught gradually, in many schools it is. I think you have been unlucky.

[TheRhubarb]

Boatto, yes you are right most schools do cover the basics, which is why I feel these DVDs are unnecessary, especially to sit the kids down and have an entire lesson devoted to it.

I was in with the Yr6 boys when they watched DVD3 (for boys). I was there with a male teacher but you could tell the boys were embarrassed at having me there and of course there were no questions afterwards or any discussion. I so badly wanted to discuss some of the things they had seen as I could tell some of them were confused but I felt that as a TA I would have been out of line. There was a box for anonymous questions but none of the boys put anything in there and besides - others would have seen them post a question so it was hardly anonymous! I was very disappointed with the whole thing.

I'm sure my school isn't the only one to have such a bad sex ed.

We have been called Gypsies Boatto because we spent 3 months living in a caravan in France. The French were very intolerant towards them. I hate the way they are generalised and the word pikies has been used a couple of times within my earshot. In fact my brother called my brother-in-law a pikie because he came from Ireland, but that's a whole different story (my brother is of mixed race and has a chip on his shoulder). Interesting dissertation choice, I'd love to read it. My dissertation was on how Spiritualism affected the reputation of Arthur Conan Doyle - a bit dull as I see it now!

[BoattoHogwartsviaBolivia]

I agree, the discussion part is difficult. The boys are always less happy to chat than the girls. Interestingly, I always teach the videos with all the children together, although I know lots do it separately. I find the girls will start to ask questions, which then encourages the boys to join in. It does so much depend on the the teacher. Ime, the male teachers tend to be less confident than the female ones, but that is a gross generalisation , I know.

If you really want a copy, PM me an address and I'll send you a photocopy! I have sent copies to lots of Traveller Education teachers over the years. The pikey thing annoys me too!

[TheRhubarb]

I wish every school had your attitude, I really do. By taking my kids out and making a fuss it's the only way I get them to revise what they do. Scrap the DVDs and make it part of a normal class and allow parents to have as much input as possible so that we feel included and can have our say.

Will you really send me a copy? That's cool! Will PM you now.

[CrapolaDeVille]

I talk to my children about sex as part of a normal discussion, usually when they ask questions or hear/see something on the TV. I don't agree with sitting them all down as a class and making a big deal of it. I think it should be spoken about within a normal class context, within biology and when they have RE. Rhubarb0

Sex Ed in RE.

Rhubarb0.... shut up yourself dear.

[TheRhubarb]

You obviously have a bit of a chip on your shoulder there - or is it a spud?

RE covers relationships, love and respect. Biology covers sex, body parts and procreation. Or at least they should. Do you understand now or do you need pictures?

[CrapolaDeVille]

Rhubarb0.... you sound like a school girl yourself.

RE should cover RELIGION, it's nothing to do with love or relationships.

I haven't posted that I couldn't have my wittle fluffy kittens hearing that touching their own bodies might feel nice, you have. You still haven't answered why it's not appropriate either. If anyone has a chip it's you.... or perhaps you just need to know that masturbation isn't dirty.

[TheRhubarb]

RE nothing to do with love and relationships? Family values? Christianity and Jesus? Marriage rituals?

Crapola, flattering as it is to have you paying me so much attention, I can't help feeling that you would be more useful peeling that spud to make chips for your family.

[BadBagel]

Combine the two together (relationships, love and respect and sex, body parts and procreation) and you have sex education :)

Rhubarb0, if sex education was taught as in BoattoHogwartsviaBolivia's school would you still have a problem with it being compulsory?

[TheRhubarb]

I think I would have a problem with anything like that being compulsory tbh. I believe that as parents have the freedom to take their children out of RE and prayers (and funny how no-one says that affects the kids) they should also be able to take them out of sex ed if they wanted to.

I understand that it provokes strong feelings and I actually respect other peoples culture and religions even if I don't believe in it myself. Sex is such a private and intimate thing and as Boatto says, parents should be teaching their kids about sex, but they don't. However we do need to be careful that we don't take over control for this aspect of their lives as some schools DO teach it very badly. Ideally parents would be invited to be as involved as possible.

But if sex ed was taught in my school as Boatto teaches it then I would not take my kids out.

[seeker]

you do know that they don;t actually talk about the "sex act" in primary school, don't you?

[BadBagel]

I still think sex education should be compulsory, it's our duty to inform and protect our children.

I hope you succeed in getting your dc's school to improve their sex education.

[TheRhubarb]

Yes they do. DVD3. You forget that I've seen it.
I think they also have a cartoon couple having basic sex on DVD2, just to show where things go.

And you still owe a tenner to charidee

BadBagel. I've spoken to the head, to the sex ed teacher etc and nothing so far has changed, but thanks for that

We'll have to agree to disagree on it being compulsory though!

[BadBagel]

Yes the dvd's do cover the sex act, how else would you explain how babies are made. Very technically though and nothing to be getting upset about, or exited even

Rhubarb0, agree to agree to disagree

[CrapolaDeVille]

As a person that is a trained RE teacher I can assure you that RE is fuck all to do with sex ed. RE should be a broad overview of religions, it does not have the monopoly on family values, love, marriage etc.

Perhaps you meant PSE?

I'm not going to reply using your silly and patronising tone, too school yard for me.

[seeker]

Well, it's certainly not in the National Curriculum for KS2.

[motherinferior]

I would be very pissed off, speaking as an atheist, if sex ed were covered in RE. Also speaking as someone not madly keen on the institution of marriage.

Mind you I'm not sure I agree with the idea of sex being thought of as 'private'.

[TheRhubarb]

I know sex ed is not part of RE, my suggestion was, if you read the post in its entireity, that love, respect and relationships should be taught within RE and sex taught within biology. It is not at the moment, that was why I suggested that perhaps, imo, it ought to be.

Crapola really is making me laugh now

seeker, sex ed isn't in the national curriculum. Not yet.

MI - private as in, there are things you do in private such as fiddling with yourself. I mean, you could all the way and say that as there is nothing wrong with our bodies and nothing to be ashamed of then what does it matter if they get their bits out in the classroom and have a good fiddle? But obv that's not going to happen so children need to be taught about privacy and not letting anyone else touch them where their swimsuits cover. As far as I am aware, schools currently do not teach this and nor is it covered in the DVDs.

[BadBagel]

Rhubarb0, imo love, respect and relationships should together with sex be taught in SRE. RE should be facts and info about religions itself (agree with crapola).

You can teach the reproduction organs etc in biology, but sex is a lot more than that.

And regarding the fiddling (it keeps coming back to that) you make it sound like teachers say 'hey it's nice so go ahead an do it here and now'
I am sure if a child did fiddle a lot in the classroom it would already have been solved by a quiet word with the parents and/or child.

[motherinferior]

Love, respect and relationships have nothing to do with relationships, imo. They may in yours, but I do not want my children taught about relationships in the context of religion. At all.

[motherinferior]

I meant 'with religion', in my first sentence.

Love, respect and relationships have nothing at all to do with religion. Especially not since a number of religions actively attack the idea of same sex love, respect and relationships.

You can be a flagrant atheist and have a nice loving relationship. Or even just lots of cheery friendly sex with an assortment of different partners.