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Original poster

People who read the Daily Mail are likely to have a shorter life span

38 replies

ivykaty44 · 11/02/2011 08:59

Apparently Daily mail readers are likely to have particular DNA that could be linked to shorter life span and ability to accept change.

I can't find the link at the moment

but has anyone seen it and can link to this

Apparently it can effect your health - this could be terrible news for serveral thousand DM readers Sad

OP posts:
EauRouge · 11/02/2011 09:01

Shock Does the Daily Mail cause cancer?

Panzee · 11/02/2011 09:02

It's only a matter of time before the DM runs a "DM causes cancer" story.

MollysChambers · 11/02/2011 09:03

It's all the pent up rage you see.

Will eventually lead to bursting a blood vessel.

I believe it to be a form of natural selection...

Original poster
ivykaty44 · 11/02/2011 09:22

Has anyone come across someone who's health has suffered due directly to reading this paper

OP posts:
cory · 11/02/2011 09:33

We certainly used to notice that my (otherwise lovely) MIL was uncharacteristically irritable and prone to rants about the state of the country on occasions when the DM could be found lying around her house.

DooinMeCleanin · 11/02/2011 09:34

Was it the same article that proved that reading too much Daily Mail could be linked to lower iq? I think I read that one.

fumbluff · 11/02/2011 09:36

Oh no! The DM is currently lining my guinea pig's hutch.
Will it turn all xenophobic and nasty? It is going to bite me now.

dotnet · 11/02/2011 09:42

Good thread!

I'd get a hutch with stronger bars for your guinea pig, fumbluff.

IvaNighSpare · 11/02/2011 09:42

apparently "Daily Mail Subscriber" is an anagram of "xenophobic, gullible bigot"

fumbluff · 11/02/2011 09:48

I am going to need a bigger hutch, one which takes a broadsheet.
I am on benefits.

EdgarAleNPie · 11/02/2011 10:13

If you have more than one child, any child with SN, have you ever slept with someone that wasn't Brad Pitt, had a glass of alchohol, had your child outside the 27-35 age range, ever had a job, ever not had a job, eaten something other than porridge, toast and fish n chips?

if so you may be in grave danger from your DM ducated Guinea Pig.

EdgarAleNPie · 11/02/2011 10:13

educated.

Hullygully · 11/02/2011 10:17

It's true.

If you are the sort of person that is drawn to the DM and finds your views reflected there, your innate bile and choler will carry you to an early grave.

fumbluff · 11/02/2011 10:19

its gonna be fick, innit. im not.

I mean, on days that they cannot think of news they have pictures of pets dressed up an everyfink. Sometimes two whole pages!

he is going to be a Guinea Pleb now. Sad

GlynistheGimmer · 11/02/2011 10:20

I thought it was because reading the DM will encourage people to want to punch you in the face?

Hullygully · 11/02/2011 10:22

And that.

TallyB · 11/02/2011 10:32

I thought they died early because they become so enraged with the damage done to Middle England by immigrants/single mothers/gypsies/Facebook/foxes their heads explode a la those people in that Cronenberg film. Or is that just the fate that awaits Melanie Phillips?

Hullygully · 11/02/2011 10:44

We used to go visit my lovely lovely MIL who suddenly would get all red and irritable and come over all Tunbridge Wells, and tell us something simply astonishing, like how all immigrants eat red squirrels, and how disgusting and appalling it was, and then we would gently ask her had she been reading the DM and watch her subside.

ambarth · 11/02/2011 10:56

Natural selection at work, killing off all the all the bigoted idiots who get their blood pressure up reading that shite. Grin

ambarth · 11/02/2011 10:58

x posted. ha ha. sorry mollys chambers.

Original poster
ivykaty44 · 11/02/2011 12:07

So DM readers and have shorter life spans through blood pressure and hutches that are to small.

Are there DM readers over 80 years old or do they decline in readership at this older age?

I hadn't thought about IQ being linked to DM readers, possibly tests could be done with this small test?

Only Daily Mail Readers will fail !!

  1. How long did the Hundred Years' War last?

  2. Which country makes Panama hats?

  3. From which animal do we get cat gut?

  4. In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?

  5. What is a camel's hair brush made of?

  6. The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?

  7. What was King George VI's first name?

  8. What color is a purple finch?

  9. Where are Chinese gooseberries from?

  10. What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?

Remember, you need only 3 correct answers to P ass.

Check your answers below.

OP posts:
GrimmaTheNome · 11/02/2011 12:13
Grin
ambarth · 11/02/2011 12:44

That's a general knowledge test not IQ, and in the age of google proves nothing...

Original poster
ivykaty44 · 11/02/2011 13:58

are you saying that DM readers would cheat ambarth...? goodness

OP posts:
wahwahwah · 11/02/2011 14:02

I think it may be because every day there is some health scare story and they either panic themselves to death or keep switching between diets and food supplements.