Rachel and Paul Chandler

[notpartofthelifeplan]

I watched the ITN documentary last night and was struck by how much love they have for each other. When you see people that have been through such trauma they often talk about how their faith kept them going.

In the case of the Chandlers it seemed as if it was their love for each other that got them through the last year.

It made me look at my relatonship in a new light. I think dh loved me like that once but since having children I don't think we have the same bond.

The Chandlers don't have children. Is it possible to have such a strong bond once children come on the scene?

crumbs thats a biggie?! I think yes you can , and if you can't see it right now you can definetly re-capture it. And remember they have been through something utterly horrific which has made them cling on to each other literally for dear life.

I think if somehow people can manage to put more thought and effort into a relationship ( I speak from experience here, cuttently going through a divorce and just met an amazing man). I think the point is not to ignore your partner, not push them away, but actively put them first (where practical). I didn't do that with my ex, far too intent on breastfeeding for as long as possible and not too bothered about getting my son to sleep through the night, and ultimatley we cracked. he never wanted to go out and do anything with me, and the resentment built up.

But that's just me. Next time I will put time, effort and patience into the relatioship, and not just on the children.

Thank you.