Trapped in a life insurance policy with ex partner!!

[Mummy95]

Hi wondering if anyone can help me, myself and my ex partner lived together for a year, we have a joint mortgage together and took out joint life insurance together. We are no longer together due to domestic violence. I have a restraining order against him so he no longer lives with me. I keep trying to cancel our life insurance policy but the life insurance company won’t let me cancel it as they need my ex partners permission. My ex partner will not consent to cancelling the life insurance policy and I feel this is part of his abusive behaviour to punish me. I am now stuck in a life insurance policy with him for 40 years! I’m scared to die as he will get a big payout for it which I think is unfair. I tried to change my beneficiary so that when I die the life insurance money will go to our child but the life insurance company said they need my ex partners permission for that which my ex partner will not agree to! What do I do?!

are you paying premiums? Or was it a single premium when you took out the mortgage?

Stop paying it and they will cancel the policy. You may need to declare on future insurances that you had one cancelled which will increase your premiums but itis up to you whether the extra money in premiums is worth getting out of the policy.

That sounds like a very difficult situation you may have to resort to going to court about this so a good first step would be to talk to a solicitor. If you are in England quite a few will give some free advice at the start.

Is it just a term assurance policy? Is it being used as mortgage protection? If not, just cancel the direct debit, they will send you a few letters, but it will lapse if premiums not paid.

Just an update, after writing numerous complaints to the insurance company and getting nowhere I’ve decided to go to the financial ombudsman, they are currently still investigating the case so I’m hopeful they will just cancel the policy or remove me from it without needing my ex partners consent.

Can I ask what happened with this op? I'm a similar position myself?

Can you not just cancel the direct debit?

Financial ombudsman said there’s nothing they can do. My ex is the one who has the direct debit so he is paying it. So I’ve took out my own life insurance and put my parents as the beneficiaries if I die

I see. That’s different. I think it will be very difficult to do anything about this in that case. What is the term on the policy? Is it joint owned and joint insured? If it is, if he goes you will get the proceeds…

I've been paying for a joint policy for 13 years since we separated. If he dies I'm quids-in. If I die he is - I don't intend to die but he wouldn't dream I've been paying it all this time nor would he have any access to my paperwork (and there's no chance he'd have the policy details either).

It used to be standard for folk to take out life assurance on their partner, even after divorce, to ensure that income was supported should they die. Not really a human rights issue op - he's the one paying out for something that is fortunately unlikely to happen during the term.

Is it mortgage protection? What is the situation with the house now?

Which insurer is it, OP? I'd like to make sure I never use them.

I'm so sorry - they've behaved appallingly. Some insurers will allow you to split the policy and considering your circumstances I think it's incredibly poor that they wouldn't at least allow for a cancellation.

If he's paying for it will it go against you if he stops? Is it stopping you from taking out another policy?

It’s zurich, think they’re a foreign company I went with them because they were the cheapest, learned my lesson now! And it was fustrating because I explained to them my situation and how it’s still abuse that he has this power over me. What’s worse is they only have my house details they don’t have his contact details (phone or address) to contact him to even ask him if he would cancel the policy. And I don’t have his details either as he got a new phone and I have no clue where he lives he wouldn’t tell me. So I find the whole thing ridiculous and I did tell them well if he stops paying will I get in trouble and they told me then I would have to pay. Which again is just ridiculous, hopefully it doesn’t come to that. I think my ex is hopeful that I will die first so he can cash in on it

Return the post to sender. They should stop correspondence being sent.

If he stops paying you will not get into any trouble, the policy will just lapse.
Just return the letters to sender.
The same thing would happen at any insurer, if it’s a joint policy it cannot be split, only if it’s dual.
He doesn’t have power over you really. Was the policy assigned so a bank for a mortgage? Whose name is the mortgage and property in now?

The insurer is not to blame here, their hands were tied. Its a joint policy, owned by both of them. To make any changes (including a cancellation) they need consent from both parties. The FOS has confirmed this.

OP, the only thing that might be worth trying if you haven't already...ask Zurich if you can change the direct debit to your bank account. They might be able to do this without your ex's say so. If they agree you could then stop paying the premiums and the cover would lapse.

You're right in that they're not doing anything wrong by the wording of their policies.

But there are a lot of conversations going on amongst people I work with about the inflexibility of joint life policies, especially where abuse is involved. Consumer Duty rules specify that products shouldn't adversely affect vulnerable customers and I'd argue that refusing to allow for a split policy in the case of domestic abuse - with documentation given the restraining order - would squarely fall under this.

So no they're not actually doing anything wrong, but on a broader scale should probably be looking at how their products might be impacting vulnerable consumers. A recent paper from a charity called Surviving Economic Abuse specifically calls for insurers to offer single life insurance policies as the default over joint policies because of the risk in cases of abuse. It also calls for lenders to take 'a different approach' to victims of abuse - now this is a suggestion, not actual regulation, but it's something firms will be reckoning with. And it's not a leap to suggest insurers might consider doing the same and flexing their policy guidelines where a victim of abuse is being forced to stay connected financially to an ex-partner.

I'd worry that your ex may harm you to gain financially so would send that information recorded or by email.
Appalling response from the insurance company.

I was thinking this.

OP I think I would go to the police, an abusive ex who has an insurance policy where they will benefit if you die has to be a concern

I'd also be challenging Zurich as 'indirect discrimination' because it is rarely men put in this position.

Is your joint policy with legal and general? Because I’m in exactly the same position with them.