I have lost my housekeeper/nanny and aupair and I am a mess. How do you do things?

[JennyLovesRosie]

I will keep this brief.

My dh and I both were made redundant, we've had to downscale everything and lost all of our brilliant help. I thought it might take a week or two to get on top of things but I am drowning under the washing/clutter/filth.The bathrooms are shocking not to mention empty fridge/creased uniforms and a baby permanantly in pyjamas after only 5 weeks!

I am ashamed to say I've never had to do any of it as I have always worked and payed other people to do it all I don't know where to start.

Could anyone spend a moment or two giving me an idea of hints/routines for keeping three children and a house in reasonable nick?

My husband is rather bemused that I am in such a muddle but I'm sure when he starts getting fishfinger suppers five nights in a row he may pitch in.

I feel like such a failure. How can I not manage?

Housekeeping is like any job: you need to get organised.

Write a list of all the chores you have to do, and then tackle one at a time. Get one chore (eg laundry/ironing) under complete control before tackling another, all the while ensuring that what is under control is kept under control.

Shop on the internet. It takes time to set up and get a revolving list going, but once you have done it it's fab. Start off with non-perishables.

Perhaps this is why I've been a bit blue. I'm a fairy organised person but we're living in chaos and I have been arrogant and lazy in thinking that it would be easy, how disgraceful is that? (I have managed to make a dent today though, a friend had my baby so that helped)

I spent the first few weeks just taking the children out all day (ignoring all chores) which was lovely and costly so no more of that either, well not for a while.

I think the FLY approach may be a bit too rigid and time consuming but I am going to start of list of essential things that have to be done on a daily basis, then weekly, fortnightly etc- hopefully that should lend some clarity- as I said this has been an eye opener.

Never go upstairs without dry washing.
Iron when you need to.
Put out your DC's clothes the night before. Always put everything in the dishwasher as soon as it is finished with.
Have a day for doing things, eg hoovering on a tuesday/Friday.

I write myself a list for the next day. I even put things on it that I would do anyway so it normally starts.
feed chickens and quail
unload dishwasher
load dishwasher
dry washing
put on washing
then I move ontothat day specific things so maybe
clean bathroom
clean out quail

etc etc
A lot of it may be things I have to do everyday but it really helps me feel good crossing things off the list.
I might have a million and one things that need to be done but I only list as many things as I know can get done so that the list gets finished each day.
Since I started doing this I've actually managed to keep on top of things (house is by no means spotless but liveable) and thats with four children, one a newborn.

I never thought I would be giving asdvice on this

I am learning to do that today! Who would have thought a grown woman could get so elated that her 4 laundry baskets are colour coded and organised. :-]

Feed chickens and quail!

??? See I have nothing that important :-0

feed kids?

I make sure i buy clothes that need no iron or very easy to iron. Try to simplify everything.

Piles would suffice if they weren't all jumbled up and in no order whatsoever. Oragnised piles are very satisfactory! :-]

I find if I can manage to do 15 minutes in each room things stay suprisingly on top

When you get up, make your bed

Go to bathroom for wee etc and while your in wipe sink over, tidy towels

Take a load of laundry down with you and get that started

Get everyone dressed (bribe/encourage kids to get ready quickly)

Whilst kids are eating breakfast empty dishwasher from night before ready to fill with breakfast dishes.

Do school run

When you get back washer will be done so put them to dry

Play with baby, potter around

When baby naps get things done that you cant do when he/she is around

Hi There

I work for Vileda and we have set up a blog with lots of tips to clean 'cleverer' in the home - have a look!

theclevercleaner.blogspot.com

you are not a failure!!!!!hi there i worked as a cleaner until 3 years ago and at one stage had 5 jobs one of the jobs was working for a dentist and his wife and they had one child at the time the first time i went to clean their quite large house it looked as if a bomb had gone off but i think the lady of the house was just overwhelmed and did not know where to start i worked for 3 hours and she was amazed at the difference ..really that first time was getting rid of clutter from work surfaces dressing tables book shelves etc i put it all into baskets she could look through later then i cleaned the bathroom and make sure the sitting room was clean and tidy opened windows etc which can make a huge difference to the feel of a room tidy i think you should concentrate on the rooms that you use most and which other people see and always always have a clean toilet after that i used to do 3 and a half hours every tuesday i got paid £17.50 for this stint i must have been mad but i got a strange sense of satisfction from it ...i hated it though when her husband used to come in for lunch just as i would leavng he would throw tbags etc into the sink that i had just spent ages cleaning grr... a great book for motivation is called home sanctuary it is great for just telling you what to do really and i must say i always feel calm and peacful when my home is clean and tidy that is until husband and sons come in at night ho hum

Oh I have found myself secretly seething when the children trudge wet mud through the living room or the not so (d)h chucks his pants and wee carelessly all over the bathroom. Strangely this did not make me want to hurl members of my immediate family out into the garden a few weeks ago.

Actually if someone else was cleaning the loo it wouldnt bother me when the boys weed all over it either!!

But woe betide them when I am cleaning it!!

How is it all going?

I think storage is a big thing too. Everything should have a place.

Get DH to help with filing paperwork and things in the evening.

Have you meal planned yet?

I also struggle to keep on top of the house - until recently i worked full time and now i work part time due to redundancy and i do all the housework myself. Its hard work and time consuming - and is not natural to me like it is to my mum and sister.

Why not get granny/grandad to take the children to the park for the day with a picnic or banish them all into one room whilst you and your husband tackle the jobs?

You should not have to look after the children, do all the cleaning and washing yourself if your husband is at home too.

Don't feel you are a failure - and don't let things mount up so that it gets on top of you. I've done that before and have not known where to start to get through it all.

My husband started to leave everything to me when i went part time and i exploded after a while and refused to do it all. He does not do as much but he does help out.

Cleaning is boring and tedious, and it soon gets untidy again.

Good luck with the jobs hunt - hope you have your help back soon!

Once you have a plan for keeping on top of the house then save time in the evenings therefore freeing up time to spend as quality time with children by either batch cooking and freezing dinners (large trays of roasted veggies or a couple of lasagnes/shepherds pies can be left to do by themselves) or investing in a slow cooker.

It's amazing how much can be done just as you go along though and 15 minute bursts are (for me) more efficient than setting aside an hour and not using it well. In 15mins I feel under pressure to achieve!

I think I'd be seething if my dh chucked wee all over the floor too...

I am trying to adopt the little and often approach,eg take out bin when kettle is boiling etc.

I have good days and bad days. When it all gets too much I usually go out shopping

15 mins bursts work for me too. BUT I must get off MN. Like now!!!!!

I found that it is easiset to try and stick to a routine and do stuff in little bursts as others have suggested

.DP is ill and unable to help and dd is disabled so time is of the essence really.I find the best thing is to try and get as much stuff organised the night before ie check ds schoolbag is ready night before and dd nursery bag.Ensure that school uniform and dd outfit is ready night before.I pack ds lunchbox with unperishables night before and make sarnies quicly when I get up.I tend to get up before dcs wake and do this about 6am.I have dead quick shower then reun bath for dp(He takes a long time to get going in the mornings due to illness).Then I tend to load washing machine and set a wash off.Then dd has usually woken and I get her changed and dressed.DS usually watches cartoons while I do this then I get their breakfasts.While they are eating I do a quick sweep of the upstairs and make beds,do a quick loo clean.After that I cajole ds into getting dressed.After ds at school I tend to do a quick hoover,then schedule time with dd.Then it is usually bung a meal in slow cooker (My best ever labour saving device).Then hang washing out.I am a bit rigid re schedule so every Sun am is bed changing day,and pm I usually do a dust.Saturdays are housework free and time for the kids.Evenings I tend to wash up while everyone else is still eating dessert,so I am not tempted and am keeping the weight down!Quick clean of kitchen and empty bins..Every night after the dc out the bath I give the bath a quick going over.After dcs pyjamased milk story and bedtime I tidy the toys away and do ironing to the telly.When kids in bed I usually do any floor mopping of bathroom/kitchen maybe a couple of times a week.I put ironing away after its done otherwise house looks like permanent laundry!Meal planning a good idea,though my meals are deffo not cordon bleu,usually casseroles,or spag bol or chile etc etc.

hth.Housework blardy tedious but it feels so much better if you can keep the clutter at bay a little.

Am expecting routine to go tits up when I start back on permanent nights soon.Will have to rethink regime!!

2 mottos: stay one step ahead at all times, and use your early mornings.

Early morning: this is the best time of day - I think - to catch up on things. Especially if your DCs are still in bed. You can get dressed, do some quiet jobs and have a coffee or too, so that by the time the DCs wake up, you feel like you are already on top of your day. If your DH is going out at 5, wake up with him and have a couple of hours to get stuff done before the DCs wake up.

try to be always 1 step ahead - that is what keeps me sane. While DD is watching the last peppa pig of the day before her bath, i tidy up her toys (or get her to help) so they are not still there when I come back down stairs.

I put the bath toys away BEFORE she gets out the bath (again, she helps put them all in the box), so i don't have to go back and do it later, etc etc.

Do as much as you can while the DCs are around, so that when they go to bed, you can relax a bit more. I clean the majority of the bathroom while DD is in the bath - that way I can keep an eye on her and chat to her while getting a job done at the same time.

Tidy as you go, so you don't have to go back over everything once they have gone to bed. That way, by the time the kids are asleep, your house is tidy and you can relax, ready for your next early start tomorrow.

there/s no rule that says you have to wait til they go to bed before you do the housework. do it while they are around, then it will set a good example and they may even start to join in and help.

Treat it like a job and write yourself daily/weekly/monthly targets.

"tidy up with children is like shovelling snow whilst it is still snowing"

You house will never be perfect with small DCs but it can still be nice.

And work smart - stack like with like in the dishwasher as you put stuff in (all knives in the same section, all similar plates together, etc) so you can just grab handfuls and put away instead of needing to sort it all out piece by piece first.

Same with washing - if you have time, peg out socks in pairs, to save time sorting them later when you might have less time. And take stuff off the line in the right order to put away - e.g. all t-shirts first, then jeans, etc. Saves you a 'sorting' job later.

Again, 1 step ahead

Think the plan thing makes you feel in control even if you dont stick to it ...so break down what needs to be done daily and weekly...and set targets eg get xyz done before kids get up (eg self showered and dressed, dishwasher empty) what has to be done before you leave for school run..cereals away table cleared...then max 1hr on return to do the rest....but clean bathroom only 1/week, admin 1day/week, bedrooms tidyied/hoovered 1 day/week/ wash floors 1 day/ week..........its all just spinning plates...my aim is to keep the kitchen worksurface cleared and lounge tidy most of the time...I just dump clutter back into bedrooms each day but only sort once a week.