FLY LADIES - walk this way for Tuesday

[ByThePowerOfGreyskull]

can't believe no one has started this yet

oh dear wolf thats hard, he's still just a babe really. any idea what sets off the hitting?

oh dear wolf that's not good. How old is ds? my dd sometimes hits out when she is overtired - could that be a trigger?
IMHO - if your mum is in charge of DS then it is up to her to sort out the hitting as well as you. I always allow my MIL and mum to discipline the children whilst in their care (well, I know they are sensible in that regard) if they are naughty. But all little ones seem to have a phase of hitting I think.
Thanks for your advice btw, just need to break it to my parents now! We will not be worried about losing the night away, it's more that my mum will be offended if we don't go (she's a bit like that, very sensitive)

Evening

Wolf- Very difficult position to be left in. I tend to agree that assuming your mother doesn't go for outrageous discipline, it would be up to her how to deal with hitting out....how can you stop a two year old from doing something when you aren't there?

TMH - Glad it went ok today.

Wendy _ Your poor dd I do hope her finger heals up ok. IME children seem to heal alot quicker than adults.

DP is still not working so the house is in tip top condition, and I am trying to look busy and stay off mn all day

Only skimming threads, s sorry for all I've missed. How is tortoise?

Wolf - Does she like looking after him otherwise?
When ds1 was 2 and I was looking after him fulltime, he used to lash out on way to naps, and sometimes when he woke up from one!or if he didn't want to sit in pushchair. I suppose they don't really have any other way of expressing their displeasure/crossness. Dylsmum you probably know the developmental answer to this one. The twins weren't so bad until they got older!
If she wears glasses it is enough to make you feel very /upset when a little fist punches you.
Maybe she just wants you to tell her she is wonderful for looking after him? You probably do already. And how much he loves her, enjoys being with her and it isn't personal?

jas dyls wendy, thank you for posting, he's two by the way. Has always been like this since birth, lashes out quite badly and he is very strong. I think a lot of it is frustration at being unable to communicate fully, its getting less as he is talking more but he is strong willed and is not keen on the word no. Today's episode with the mother was because he didn't want to come in from playing in the snow and I had the exact same incident with him yesterday.

With the discipline thing I always let her do as she sees fit and I don't get involved if she tells him off etc. Actually I am pretty hands off with everything to do with him when she has him even though I don't necessarily agree with everything she does and some of it goes against things I've asked her to do (juice being a case in point). I tend to take the view that she's the one dealing with him on a daily basis then she knows what she needs to do to deal with a particular situation.

The difficulty is that when carrying him down the garden steps etc or anywhere that there's a risk he could hurt himself when he thrashes about she can't take our normal approach of lying him on the floor saying no smacking and walking away and he is just a very angry little man when thwarted.

I have had a very stern conversation with him this evening trying to explain consequences of actions (I made the poor kid cry ) but I think he is still too young to really grasp that concept fully. He would be devastated if he couldn't go to grandma and grandad's anymore.

and swan x posts

I checked your profile to find his age!

DS will be three next month, and his speech is ok, but not great, and I think he is still too young to understand telling off for something in the past (anything that happened this afternoon is an age away for a little person)

DS kicks, and is also very strong, but for us the only thing that has had any results has been totally ignoring bad behaviour, which is extremely difficult if not impossible at times.

The only way I could get ds in would be to tell him, then when he said no, go in and shut the door and wait. So far, he follows once I've lefthim.

walk this way, talk this way