To move or not to move that is the question

[Watdaheck]

DH and I downsized 2 years ago. After living for many years in a big 4 bed house with 4 kids (all adults now and no longer living at home) we moved to a much nicer area, by the beach into a small 3 bed detached.

At the time, I would have preferred a slightly bigger house (maybe a small 4 bed) as we both have hobbies that take up lots of space but couldn’t find one in our price range or area we wanted to be and were charmed by this little house. So, atm, we have our main bedroom which is an okay size but smaller than ideal (though still the biggest bedroom) the second bedroom is my DH hobby room and the 3rd bedroom has 2 single beds squeezed in for guests, I’d say we have overnight guests for roughly 20 days of the year.

The garage was supposed to be my gym but has progressively become a dumping ground for various bits and pieces and it’s become more difficult to work out in there though we have plans to declutter.

We have both come to realise that the house really isn’t big enough for our needs but since moving in we have spent in the region of £30k on doing it up (new kitchen took the majority of that)

I would ideally also like space for my sewing machine, my pc ( currently wedged into a corner of guest bedroom) and a larger dressing table ( currently in corner of main bedroom but so small to be of not much use)

DH has suggested we remove one of the beds from the guest room and I could put in a dressing table and a small table for sewing machine but this would mean no space for multiple guests (only single ones)

The only other alternative is to move to a larger house (definitely no space to extend here)

My sticking point is that I was brought up to have space for guests in my house and be hospitable but DH says if we haven’t got space for guests they can go to a hotel or B &B.

we are in a position now to afford a larger house but would definitely not recoup the money we have spent on this house. I love this little house with its beautiful garden, 3 minute walk to the beach and lovely neighbours but it’s just too small and I hate to have to turn down guests. WWYD?

Any room for a cabin in the garden?

Sadly no.

sofa bed downstairs
And a single bed with a pull out second bed underneath .
That will solve the spare bed situation at least. For a few nights a year I wouldn't move personally.

If you like your house and don't want to move, everything else could be fixable:

• stop dumping stuff in the garage and be ruthless about decluttering
• single bed with a trundle underneath in the guest room
• fold-down wall desk as a sewing table? Dunno how much space sewing machines take up. Maybe an extra folding table when needed?
• Is there space for a dressing table in the spare room if you have the trundle bed, i.e. you wouldn't be using it while the bed was up, but there might be space for it to still be in there?
• Chair bed in DH's hobby room.

I'm with your DH, your house needs to work for you, guests can stay elsewhere !

One of the single beds has a trundle bed underneath but it’s no good for adults though for smaller grandchildren. We’ve just spent 4k on new sofas downstairs so nowhere to put a sofa bed.

Then it depends how much you want to accommodate guests, and if entertaining is a huge part of your current lifestyle then moving is probably the best option.

Perhaps have a ruthless look at your stuff and think about whether a good clear out might help. Would a sofa bed instead of beds in the guest room work so it could be used as a sewing room other times? Could you build in a dressing table in a corner? Have a 4ft 6 bed instead of a king?

I agree with your DH. Your house is yours every day of the year. Use all of the space and enjoy your it. If guests want to visit they can stay elsewhere.
Or look into Murphy beds so the room can be multipurpose.

Yeah I’m thinking DH is right on this one. I just feel sh*T telling family and friends we have no space for sleeping (DH even said he’d pay for them to stay in a hotel but still seems inhospitable to me)

Tent in the garden for kids?

Honestly, if the options are move house or pay for hotels for all your guests, I'd maybe reconsider some of your furniture, even if you have just spent loads on it. E.g. it must be possible to get a sturdier trundle bed, or to find a sofabed or chairbed for the sitting room even if it means selling one of your new sofas? Still cheaper than moving.

Do a really nice garage conversion for guests? (If planning permission allows?)
Hire a storage unit for the stuff you don't actually need.

I agree, it's most important to prioritise your day to day needs but with some allowance for visitors. We only have 2 bedrooms now but can accommodate a couple and a single with sofa beds in the living room and second bedroom ( which is mostly an office).
If the second adult child starts seeing someone we will have to look at another double sofa bed!!

https://marmell.co.uk/products/double-vertical-wall-bed-with-desk-and-cabinets-with-shelves-st

These?

I agree with you re being able to welcome guests. However I’m not sure if you are hiding behind this as a justifiable reason when ultimately the house isn’t working for you.

1. as you/we get older, being able to walk to the beach, having lovely friendly supportive neighbours (a community) and feeling safe are all very important.

2. having space to live and be your self in your home is import at. Feeling cramped and constrained isn’t good for you. What happens when you have grandchildren?

If you can afford somewhere with a better space for you then look for it. Why not view some properties to see if the right thing is out there. With house buying I firmly believe in a quick yes or no.

You may find something ideal with the market as it is just now and in a great area too.

obvs you don’t want to loose money on your house, if you break even in a couple of years that’s ok if it gets you in a better place.

New sofas is cheaper than moving house!!

Why can’t your DH minimise his hobby stuff/have better storage so there is room for a bed?

I can guarantee you have more stuff than you actually need and could invest in better storage.

Just going to say dont hire a storage unit - we did that and held on to it for years. Eventually almost 90% was put in a skip. I regret not being willing to make the hard choices at an earlier stage. I wince every time I drive past the storage units!

Interesting that it's your hobby and gym space and priorities that have been sidelined. DH has a hobby room and is happy to have guests stay at a b&b. You have no space for your hobbies, no gym and if you want these things you won't be able to have guests. Does DH need an entire room for himself - is there any room for you in there? Get the garage cleared - particularly if it's filled with crap that yoy don't need.

Can I ask why your husband's hobby room is the second largest bedroom and not the smallest - is there anyway you can swop them over?

Before you consider moving I think you need to declutter - you should do it beforehand anyway but doing it now would give you a better idea of the space you actually have.