Overwhelmed with cluttered, unloved, dirty (ish) home

[Lostand44]

As the title says really … Life has been very busy, health within the household has been up and down for a year (nothing major on my part, more DH however I think my mental health has declined over this time, I’m just tired and unmotivated at the moment).

Our home is now at the point that it completely overwhelms me. I made some progress over the course of the summer but it’s back to the way it was now - if not worse! Simple things like keeping on top of the washing and dishes is sometimes too much! I’m ashamed of my home!

What I need I think, is to wake up in the morning with a plan of how to tackle it in small chunks. I would post photographs of each room so you can see what I need help with but it’s embarrassing 😳.

House has: living room, kitchen, hallway, bathroom and 3 bedrooms. It should not be hard to keep clean and tidy! I think the thing is that it’s just got lots of ‘stuff’ in it! Things are broken/tired/need decorating but at the moment I can’t even use my dining table as it is covered in stuff.

3 adults at home but I will be doing the work (I prefer it that way, 1 is ill, the other works very long hours). I have around 3 hours a day to spend on the house (very little money at the moment so would rather tackle the issues than just buy more storage to shove everything into!)

Does anyone have any advice or suggestions on how I can do this? I’d love my house to be a home again for Christmas!

Don't start anything you can't finish, so just do 30 mins at a time. Even one drawer will motivate you. I put stuff for the charity shop straight into the car otherwise I forget to take it and it lives in the hall way!

I haven’t rtft

get a bin liner - start in any room you like and start filling it up - with any rubbish or anything you see in that room that you no longer want

books, clothes, empty bottles, rubbish………

This will take about twenty mins - you’d be surprised what you can get rid of in such a window!

Another Great tip is to do a ten item declutter

Each day get rid of ten thing from each room.

Go round each room with a a black bin liner.

Best thing I did, and Im not joking when I say it took a couple of years, was decluttered

Like yourself, life took over, as did low lying depression and for years I did the bare minimum

Dont get me wrong, kept the worktops in the kitchen clean, bathrooms clean and vacuumed once in a while, but proper cleaning was beyond me so OMG , I could have given Miss Faversham a run for her money

So in my couple of functioning hours a day, I tackled one spot - a drawer, a shelf, a box , took it apart, decided on what I wanted to keep, what was no longer needed and if it was rubbish or saleable or donation. Just doing wee little spots meant I still had enough in me to do the basics I was keep up on. As each wee spot was cleared, the wiping down/dusting/vaccuming/polishing to keep it up took seconds

Every spot in my house has been decluttered , well maybe not every, but the areas that are, are now incorporated in my daily "clean" - bathrooms take 5 mins each, vacuuming 10 mins, polishing and dusting 20 mins - and then I have the time in my couple of hours to maybe decide the kitchen floor needs doing or the skirtings.

When the drawer/shelf/cupboard that was decluttered starts to fill up and look a mess, it gets decluttered again.

Clearing the clutter has been the best thing for me - I can actually clean, Im not spending 3 hours picking up and putting stuff away

I really need to do this, I've got to the point that I spend all day out of the house as I can't bear to be surrounded by the clutter. What I need to know is when you say "throw" what if your bin is full, what can you do with all the stuff?

What bin are we talking about? The Wheelie?

You dont panic

3 adult here and we can fill our recyclable within a few days, the brown household waste takes a bit longer

So you are short of space, but need to find space. Thats where we all start. So work on the space where you can put a collection crate, be that a box or tub or whatever, find where that is going and start in that area

Soon as you find that space - under the stairs, in the lobby, by the front door, put two containers - one to be recycled and one for charity

Minute that container is full - get shot - do the recycling run, charity shop run

Rubbish - pita, you have to make that as small as you can, but tbh when you take out all that can be recycled theres not a lot

Im miles away from a town so I do drive and I can drop off when it suits me. But cos I live so rural, we have a lot of community pages and if someone else is doing a dump run, they will say and lift mine and Ill do the same, Im sure your local neighbourhood page will have those offering/wanting

When I lived in London, anything that was usable but not worth the hassle of listing, Id stick out the front door early morning, be gone by lunch

Its hard to get rid of stuff when you think I said blah blah for that. I know. However Im learning that space is worth twice as much

I love this advice!
I have just had my hall floor resanded and had to clear it out. My goodness I have some clutter! Having it clear gives me so much joy walking in, that I asked my daughter to help me for a couple of hours to get the skirtings sanded and painted. I've since progressed to painting all of it. I just needed that kick. Good luck OP. I once read an excellent piece of advice that a psychologist gave to a depressed lady - she was struggling to find any motivation to clean and tidy and the dishwashing was her trigger point. He said "well put the dishwasher on twice if you need to"! It is simple things like this, and a bit of a kick from family that have helped me.

Cannot recommend Dana K White (Slob Comes Clean) highly enough. She has written a couple books - How to Manage Your Home without Losing Your Mind and Decluttering at the Speed of Life.

What sets her apart, is that she's NOT a naturally tidy/organised person. Like you, she used to feel overwhelmed on regular basis. So it's really worth a read. She's quite funny too.

What she recommends, and that's exactly what you're doing, is tackling your daily non negotiables first. So do your dishes, tidy stuff away, etc. You need to build a habit of doing something every day, as that then creates you headspace to tackle other/bigger things, because you don't need to think about sink full of dishes anymore.