Decluttering and organising thread 8 – it’s nearly summer

[stealthninjamum]

These threads are accountability threads for mumsnetters who are decluttering and organising our homes.

We’re all at different stages of decluttering from the beginning to the maintenance phase and use different techniques. Join us for support and chat .

We discuss all things to do with decluttering, the things that stop us decluttering, how to get over them, where to dispose of our clutter, how we can encourage our families to join us, and pretty storage solutions which is the fun part.

I’m doing one last big push to get rid of loads of stuff before the long summer holidays when it’ll inevitably turn to chaos again.

Useful tips
Some of us have found the Toss app (on apple) a great place to start with decluttering.

Many of us love Dana K. White (A Slob Comes Clean) on youtube and podcasts.

Many of us at the start just take a timer for 5 or 10 minutes to just make it seem less daunting. I used to start by clearing surfaces.

If you want to make a big impact quickly then increasingly charities will pick up your furniture, books and clothes so you don't even need to leave the house. Or if you have hundreds of books / CDs it's really easy to use the Music Magpie, ziffit or We buy books apps to get them taken away and earn a (very) small amount of money at the same time.

The BBC TV Program Sort Your Life Out is particularly inspiring.

When I do housework I listen to podcasts from a Slob Comes Clean, Clutterbug, the Declutter Hub and The Art of Decluttering. If you think you have ADHD then Clutterbug talks about this a lot as she has ADHD, and Amy from The Art of Decluttering did an ADHD season about 8 or 9 months ago which gave some good tips. My dc have ADHD so it’s something I’m very interested in.

@SagittariusUprising I found our cloth really hard to let go. Partly because I bought most of it when second hand prices were really high and I'd expected to make something back, now the second hand market is totally dead. Couldn't even give some of mine away for free! Still, it's all gone now- wish you luck.

I have many things earmarked to go. A bag in the car for charity and another for fabric recycling. All have been there for weeks. None have yet left.

@PissedOffNeighbour22 I'm not going to hit 2024 either (probably looking at circa 1,800) but i did hit 2021, 2022 and 2023 . . . I've lost my motivation a bit now.

Also, DH is a bit annoyed because I accepted three binbags of clothes from friend-of-friend which DS will grow into in about 2026. To be fair, I'm not sure where I'm going to put them.

@Jellycatrabbit it's crazy that one family can have thousands of items to get rid of isn't it. I didn't find this thread until last year but I'm glad I did as it does give me a way to focus on the end goal of a clean and tidy home without unnecessary tat.

I'd have taken the bin bags of clothes too. Old habits die hard 😄.

Emptied out unwanted chest of drawers and sorted contents. Binned some ancient shaving bits and pieces, and toothbrushes.
Unearthed six pairs of glasses to go to SpecSavers.

Chest of drawers now in hall awaiting donation or sale.

Bag of privet sweepings from garage to garden waste bin. Weedkiller onto weedy verge.

For vinted - Pair of too-small jeans with tags and similar pair of jodhpurs.

Iron Man costume and mask.

outgrown joggers and teeshirt for charity shop.

One dried up felt pen. Total is 2822

i've been keeping a list and it's helping ensure I get rid of one thing a day. here's the last week or so!

• books x 3

* table * sudocrem and various bathroom items * loads of kitchen food and bottles * listed the chair * two glass products and sponge bathroom * chair and grey rucksack * folders and general junk from cupboard * pants, socks, pair of trousers * lavender essential bottle. empty box kitchen

That is an awful situation @IncessantNameChanger and must be really frustrating for you to watch. Surely his uni never should have put him on a course three hours from his accommodation.

No more ‘outs’ this weekend but after my utility room declutter I spent the weekend doing diy with some of the bits I found. I moved one painting and put two up that I bought around lockdown. I can’t believe they’ve been sitting against the fire in my sitting room for about three years. I also used that sugru mouldable glue to fix a drawer front that’s been broken for about three years. How have I never found that stuff before? So far it’s still attached and seems a good hold.

Been working a lot so no real outs here. So sorry to hear that @IncessantNameChanger its difficult when you arent right there with them and they are wanting to be independent.
is there any chance uni would allow him to put the course on hold and begin agsin next year in more suitably located accomodation?

Yes the bottom has really fallen out of the market. (Pun intended).

I really want them to live their full useful life as our motivation for choosing cloth was to reduce volumetric waste, rather than save money. So hopefully we can find someone who will use them!

@IncessantNameChanger its so tough when you want to be there for them but also have to let them be independent. Who knows, the politics degree may keep him engaged for now and lead to something else down the line. The three hours commute sounds dreadful.

I have a horrid cold that I’m trying to ignore as I have a few days off and want to get on with things. Went sofa ‘choosing’ with DH this morning, now just need to order it. And get them to take away the biggest most wrecked old sofa too.

Jobs:

1. Hang up framed pictures
2. DS2 paperwork: blue badge started
3. my British passport application - after half term trip to Belgium
4. garden generally tidied for end of summer - started
5. loads of scout badges onto blanket - 8 left
6. DS1’s room: ongoing…plus some scout badges to his blanket: new bed here, nearly finished assembling it
7. bring down the wardrobe; DH & I failed on this, too heavy, need another adult
8. IKEA wardrobe for DD; sort her clothes, her wardrobe to my room for DH

Not quite outs yet:
Running leggings to go to a friend - remember to take to Parkrun - she wasn’t there!
spare tap left from building works - on FB, bumped up
knackered suitcase to put on FB - posted
old school PE shorts to a friend DD - DONE ☑️
my long gone mother’s recliner - downstairs & listed on FB free site
old duvets bagged up & donated to dog charity - waiting for collecting lady
curtains poles - listed on FB free site

Out:
nothing new I can think of, jigsaw to charity pile but not out yet
lots of tissues though 🤧
1492

3 listings done.
5items added to the sell pile. 1 item binned.
Need to test new batteries on one item and if working then will sell, and if not then it can be donated to school (they don't take toys that have sounds/lights) but will still work fine to be played with without the lights/sounds.
Spare part for bike has arrived so need to fix that this weekend - it doesn't look easy.

I have lots of bits to fix watches that Ds1 left behind, no success so far though!

Jobs:

1. Hang up framed pictures
2. DS2 paperwork: blue badge started
3. my British passport application - after half term trip to Belgium
4. garden generally tidied for end of summer - started
5. loads of scout badges onto blanket - 8 left - must do before camp this weekend!
6. DS1’s room: ongoing…plus some scout badges to his blanket. Bed DONE ☑️
7. bring down the wardrobe; DH & I failed on this, too heavy, need another adult
8. IKEA wardrobe for DD to order; sort her clothes, her wardrobe to my room for DH

Not quite outs yet:
Running leggings to go to a friend - remember to take to Parkrun - she wasn’t there!
spare tap left from building works - on FB, bumped up
knackered suitcase to put on FB - posted
my long gone mother’s recliner - hopefully collected tomorrow
old duvets bagged up & donated to dog charity - waiting for collecting lady
curtains poles - listed on FB free site

Out:
packaging from new bed for DS1’s room
knackered shoes from DD in the bin
1492+2=1494

Needed a torch yesterday, have 3, none working. Charged up all the batteries today, enough for two torches. One coroded torch to recycling. Total is 2823

I’ve just decluttered our bedding. Three of dc’s bedding sets have gone and a really holey sheet which is being replaced with a new one. I had done a huge clear out of my airing cupboard - including bedding and towels - about six years ago and I still get joy when I see how organised they are. Now the pile is even smaller.

Ds said last night he is going to completely drop out and move home. He can't work as his mh is bad. So now I have the prospect of 6 people living in our 3 bed again. Also he never has paid any rent so I will have to support him living like a child until I die. Told him it's not his choice if he wants to move back rent free with no plan. He got angry so I hung up on him. I'm so angry as he hasn't asked about the debt. He has said he knows for a fact as he hasn't paid for halls or the course yet he can just pay the debt back.

Oh no @IncessantNameChanger 😢 have you spoken to him again? Any chance of changing his mind? Has he spoken to anyone there? I’m sure lots have wobbles so early on, they must have a support system in place?

Please may I join you all?
I’m finally trying to get on top of things without feeling overwhelmed. So, I’ve started up yoga for me and gently started FlyLady for the house. I’ve gutted one DD bedroom, and living room/dining room, but there’s still such a big amount. A lot of the issue is lack of storage and no money to buy any, and keeping for “what ifs” that never happen. I’ve been doing 15 minute declutter each day which is helping but am very tired.
Today I filled a black bag for the dump. I’ll try to do another 15 min in a bit.

So sorry @IncessantNameChanger I wish I had words of comfort but all I can say is that young people can be incredibly self-centred at that age. Let's hope he soon realises his actions affect others. Sending strength.

I’m sorry @IncessantNameChanger that’s annoying for you, sending hugs. I’m actually shocked a university would first put him on a course that involved so much travelling and then on a course he’d shown no interest in.

Welcome poisonwood you’ve made a good start. I used to do fly lady but couldn’t handle the constant emails. I do still empty my car out every Friday because she told me to.

I have decluttered a handbag and another set of bedding. I have a huge pile of things to go now so I might try and fill the car with them tonight for a charity shop run.

W/E 6th October
Had to have my darling dog pts at the end of September, so didn't feel like doing much for a few days but now feeling a need to be busy. (I already mentioned this on Christmas Cleanalong).
Saddest bit of decluttering was taking all his good quality and usable things to the local animal sanctuary last weekend; he had a lot of stuff for a small dog, but at least it has all gone to a good home. Still keep finding bits and bobs...

Decluttered
Kitchen part 2
Bathroom drawers
IT stuff
Also decluttered myself out of a few more work related WhatsApp groups.
My work email account should have been closed down on 30/9 so no need to check it any more. Feel like I have properly retired now.

Donated
Unopened box of panty liners (to food bank)
18 books, cosmetic bag full of bits of jewellery, spectacle case, water bottle, 9 candleholders, 1 pair boots, 2 coffee pots, 1 hat (to charity shop)

Binned
1 x knickers
Tampons(opened)
Panty liners (opened)
Toothpaste (opened, nobody likes it)
Lip balm (opened, solidified)
Sugar scrub (opened, solidified)
Razor heads DH no longer has razor for

@IncessantNameChanger sorry to hear that. Suggest to him maybe asking about deferring and starting again next year without the massive commute. It’s really difficult when you are stuck between the uni and them. My eldest dropped out last year and is back home hunting for apprenticeships/jobs. He has accumulated two and a bit years of debt though 🤦🏼‍♀️

I know it's tough, but try to think if the debt as a payment into the university of life - they'll come out of the experience wiser! It isn't easy to find your path straight out if school, but there is so much time for 20-somethings to get back on track...

Incessant if he's determined to give up university, sounds like it's time for him to claim benefits. He can't help it if he can't work but that doesn't mean you have to care for him until you die. He can pay you rent then out of his benefits, charge him the going rate for a house share that includes utilities if you need to and charge him for a cleaner to come clean his room weekly so it doesn't turn into a typical stinking boy pit. He can do his own laundry, ill or not. If finances allow you could get him a fridge, kettle and microwave for his room then he can buy and sort his own food. Alternatively refuse him to come home and he'll have to claim homeless through the council, which might be best for him to enable him to secure a council flat for stability and lower rent, since he may never work(? Just guessing, because it sounds like he doesn't cope with life). If he needs to seek diagnosis to get on benefits then that's what he'll have to do, otherwise he'll have to jobsearch to qualify for them. He'll be able to claim housing connection in his university area and your area so he can bid on properties from two councils. He'll need to make two applications, one of them for help with homelessness in one area and one to join the bidding list due to local connections in the other area. 6 people in a three bedroom home, you with hoarding, uni-DS with MH, sounds a real strain. Fingers crossed you can sort something out to benefit everyone.

RIP DDog, Dare and congratulations on your retirement 🎈

Two unsuitable dresses gone, one I don't really like and one that's too long and needs braless (which ain't me!) Total is 2825

Binned - one set of tatty earmuffs.

One broken electric toothbrush and charger.

Charged up the other electric toothbrush that DH insisted was broken. It works fine. Maybe he’ll use it. So not a declutter, but saved me from buying replacement.

Three pairs holey joggy bottoms to ragbag.

I think I'm having a walking breakdown. Everything has just too much for me. I'm the fixer and organiser in this home and I'm just burnt out. I'm having extremely heavy periods ( I lost 600ml plus of blood in one hour day 2 of last period) and have sleep apnea, possibly peri, three disabled kids, useless uni age boy mentally unfit to work. Hoarder so my own mh problems. Mum died last year so had to deal with that. People watch me cope and fix everything but I'm done.

Got my hoarding course tomorrow so got to plod on. Listed some more bits but I have two bin bags I'm ready to take off vinted and donate.

Doing slob comes clean so looked at toys, found some back backs. They didn't fit on the cot hangers so I sorted the coats! Two coats, one backpack and three hoodies ready to go now. Toys remain pretty untouched.